Top Ten Little Known Facts About Cliff Lee

The October tradition returns!

10) Sometimes he uses his telekinesis to will foul balls into the stands, just so that he can finish the strikeout

9) Every time an umpire rules that he has issued a walk, their wives and daughters service a hobo

8) He prefers to pitch road games, since he gets to hear despair from people other than his direct opponents

7) Lee thinks that Roy Halladay and Tim Lincecum are quaint

6) In tonight's game, he used his Jedi powers to make Brett Gardner not touch first base with his hand, smacked the Yankee with his calf, and also dosed him with chili gas

5) Lee is so good that he makes opposing managers not use their closers when they are behind, preferring to save them for games they could actually win

4) He is the first pitcher in postseason history to have three games with over 10 strikeouts, because in past lives, his soul prevented MLB from expanding the playoff schedule

3) When he is no longer interested in baseball, he will ascend, rather than retire

2) His son was diagnosed with leukemia, but not after Lee heard about it

1) The next contract he signs will involve a ludicrous sum of money and an undisclosed number of souls