Pissing Off Euros

As part of our mandate (his name is Steve) to irritate myopians all over the sports world, FTT notes the coming arrival of one of the worst sports events of the year: the Tour de France.

For sheer uselessness, it's very hard to top the Tour. Let's take them all in order...

> Pompous. Check. You can't beat any sport in which Euros tells you that you are too stupid to appreciate it. Why, yes, Pierre -- guys pedaling *is* riveting. If only I were more cultured.

> Unpopular. Here's a rule of thumb. If your sports is on Versus, no one gives a crap. (We're waiting for the outraged comments from NHL fans, but that would involve the NHL still having fans.)

> Tedious. In spades. And this comes from a guy who rides trains for 15 hours a week, and watches film with subtitles.

> Scandalous. Is there a cyclist that isn't a confirmed needle ass, or someone who hasn't spent their life screaming to the skies that they aren't a needle ass? Bud Selig thinks that cycling has an image problem.

> Anonymous. If you can name a cyclist that is actually racing in this roid circus, you're either on someone's payroll or have absolutely no life. Actually, scratch that -- you're probably both.

> Not really a sport. The link gives you a longer post about this from earlier in the year, but the short of it is this: if what you are doing is commuting, it is not a freaking sport. (That takes out NASCAR, walking, ski jumping and a great many other Olympic non-sports. We're not wrong about this.)