NASCAR fans don't need help...

to see things that don't exist. That's what the meth and bathtub gin is for.

From Awful Announcing via With Leather, and sponsored by the same dipshit mentality that brought you the Red Hot Puck and many, many things that I'm blocking out of my mind because My Mind Is A Happy Place... well, play it, already. In case you're wondering, ESPN is accused of this nonsense.



As always, I have to wonder what's next. Flatulence waves for quarterbacks when they're sacked? Yellow dribbles down the front of struggling closers? Smoke pouring out of the ears of irate coaches? In the words of the late great Bill Hicks on the Easter Bunny, so long as we're making shit up...