Thursday, July 16, 2009

The Joba Tragedy


Here's the first half of Joba Chamberlain.

4-2, 4.25 ERA, 1.56 WHIP.

17 starts, 89 innings (just over 5 innings per).

78 Ks, 42 Walks.

To give you an idea of just how Meh all of that is, here are just a few of the starting pitchers that Yahoo ranks as being more useful to your fantasy team than Joba, so far in 2009.

Brandon Backe
Jeff Karstens
Jason Hammel
Tomo Ohka
David Purcey
Brad Thompson
Brett Cecil
Anibal Sanchez
Shane Loux
Chan Ho Park

Needless to say, these guys are Very Available in your free agent pool. (Yahoo's metrics are a little screwy, in that they also rank guys who haven't pitched at all as being more useful than Joba, but you get the point.)

Now, if you listen to some folks, this is proof that Chamberlain has been horribly misused by the Yanks. If only they had left well enough alone, the 7th and 8th inning dominance that he showed in 2007 would have continued ad infinitum, and the team would have its obvious next closer in waiting. Along with at least five (ten? twenty?) more wins.

This, however, misses four key points.

1) The team needs a good starter more than a set-up man

Which makes them the same as every other team in baseball.

2) Chamberlain was actually quite effective as a starter last year

In a dozen starts last year, he was 3-1 with a sub 3-run ERA, and a 74/25 K/BB rate in 64 innings. Sure, he still wasn't going deep into games, but you can win with a guy getting more than a strikeout an inning and good numbers, even with 5 and 6 inning starts.

3) Young pitchers *always* break your heart

Ask Marlins' fan about how much fun it's been to watch Ricky Nolasco, for the most part, this year. (Or me, since I had him as my Cy Young pick.) Or Mariners' fan if they feel great about that Brandon Morrow uniform purchase. Scott Baker is making Twins Fan break out in hives on a near-weekly basis. David Price has had control issues that makes Rays Fan wonder if they are just looking at an unfortunate Scott Kazmir rerun. There's also, well, Kazmir.

All of these guys are highly similar comparables to Chamberlain; all have disappointed. It's the nature of Pitching, especially Young Pitching, and it's why your fantasy league is routinely not won by the guy that drafted Brandon Webb, Cole Hamels and Johan Santana. There are no real sure things.

(You'd think Yankee Fan would know this by now, having spent much of the decade being disappointed by Sure Thing Free Agent Pitchers. But I guess when your eyes fall in love with a guy, and he pumps his fists after getting outs, that goes out the window.)

And, finally, this...

4) The most unpredictable pitcher on a team, from year to year, is the set-up guy

Naming a guy that has dominated the ninth inning consistently for the past three to five years is relatively easy. Joe Nathan, Mariano Rivera, Jonathan Papelbon, Francisco Rodriguez, Bobby Jenks, and that's just off the top of my head, and AL only.

Now, the eighth? I can only think of one, Scott Shields, and he's fallen off recently as well. It's a fungible role; your only real hope, as an organization, is to get a steady stream of guys that miss bats, and let them move on when dumber clubs sign them away. (Baltimore, a few years ago, locked up a bunch of established middle inning guys, then watched them all implode. It's like the baseball equivalent of having good kickoff return coverage.)

So when you see Chamberlain nibble, drive big pitch counts, and become a maddening six inning or less pitcher, the answer isn't to just wave the magic wand and make him Mariano II. Especially when, once you do that, you'll wind up turning back to Phil Hughes, who will magically return -- I guarantee it -- to becoming the same guy who has driven you nuts for the past 1.5 years of starts and injuries once they put him back in the rotation. It's just the way of the world: young pitchers break your heart, until they don't, and it's a hell of a lot easier to come into the middle of a game, throw your best gas for 25 pitches or less, and get guys who have been playing for two hours or more out. (Ever notice how often extra innings games go on for a while with no offense? A tired hitter is not a good hitter.)

Oh, and if you want to find someone to blame for Chamberlain's trouubles? Well, I'd note that he now pitches in a bandbox that gives up Coors-esque homer rates, which means that his 4.25 ERA might not be that bad after all. He also works in front of a left side of the infield that's fairly range-less, with outfielders that don't have plus arms. His bullpen has, until recently, been fairly fire-friendly to inherited runners. You'd nibble, too.

Or you could also just blame the guy throwing the ball, too. Or is that too hard, seeing how he pumps his fists when he's happy?

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Top 11 reasons why the Pedro Martinez signing will work for the Phillies

11) By the numbers, there has to be at least one player per year that's helped by the World Baseball Classic

10) He's only got to be better than freaking Rodrigo Lopez

9) If he doesn't pitch well, he can't suck the Phillies into signing him to a longer contract that they'll really regret

8) Now that there's been a race-based controversy in Philadelphia from that swimming pool story, he'll feel like he's back in Boston

7) He's just 86 wins away from 300

6) As this is the first time since 1999 that he doesn't have an 8-figure salary, he might have a wee bit of incentive

5) From all appearances, he's now 100% midget-free

4) Charlie Manuel looks enough like Don Zimmer to Pedro to reanimate his warrior spirit

3) He's only 37, which with his Dominican birth, means he's no more than 42

2) For heaven's sake, Bruce Chen has a job in MLB right now; you are telling me that a guy with a career .694 won-loss percentage and 2.91 ERA in a Roid Era can't come up with a few good months?

1) If he pitches really well, it will prove yet again that God really, really, really hates Mets Fan

Top 10 changes for the Cubs in bankruptcy

10. Ryan Theriot has to switch to store brand cereal and juice boxes

9. Geovany Soto to go in the tank and limit his arbitration earnings

8. Carlos Zambrano can only destroy water coolers instead of Gatorade dispensers

7. Team HMO to no longer pay for Milton Bradley's crazy pills

6. Kosuke Fukudome to be paid in yen (and still be wildly overpaid)

5. Lou Pinella to keep doing that "Relief Pitcher / Outfielder" move to cut down the overall roster size

4. Try very hard not to sign any more 33 year old leadoff hitters with sub .300 on base averages to $17 million a year contracts

3. Auction off the closer role to Carlos Marmol's desperate fantasy owners

2. Convince the insurance company that how Ryan Dempster hurt himself was an act of God

1. No longer going to pay to have Steve Bartman stalked, ostracized and audited

Monday, July 13, 2009

Blogrolling Asks If You Have A Little Bit Of The Douchebag In You

A UFC guy has Johnny Cash ink. I also understand that he's so tough, he sentenced a man to a beatdown, just to beat him down.

What happens when you let guys from Minneapolis party in St. Louis. Embrace the whiteness!

One more from the Human Cockfighting, here's the fun part of beating a man when he's more or less helpless. Sporting!

Is there anything more painful from Home Run Derby? Yes. Home Run Derby trivia.

Donovan McNabb gives Eagle Fan more fuel for the fire by being photographed at poolside in Vegas with women of ill repute, which is now being posted on blogs of ill repute. And to think, I wasn't sighing enough for the lack of real sports today...

Top 10 shocking revelations about NFL training camp

It's just about that time again, kids! Now, let me ruin the whole movie for you by telling you how it ends.

10) It's hot outside

9) Many of the bigger players eat a lot

8) Your team's star player is convinced that this is the year they are (a) going to the playoffs, (b) having a very big year statistically, (c) going to the Super Bowl, (d) winning the Super Bowl

7) The final cuts are going to be very, very difficult

6) The late round guy that was drafted for his speed might make an impact on special teams

5) Fantasy football players really need to keep an eye on Unknown Bench Guy and/or Rehabbing Injury Guy

4) Older players aren't quite as fond of training camp as the younger guys

3) Even though the pre-season games don't count in the standings, the coaches and players are still Playing To Win, Dammit

2) It's very, very, very important, and anyone who doesn't think so is probably a Communist

1) After six months of No Football, and two months of nothing but baseball, you will eat it with a fricking knife and spoon and beg for more