Saturday, January 20, 2007

Ask Not What FTT Can Do For You, Ask What You Can Do For FTT


We have heard your cries.

We know what is in your hearts.

In every campaign stop, in every little town, in the expectant eyes of every man, woman, and child.

You are looking for a new way forward.

For a sports blog that dares to hope for a better future. (Oden or Durant in a Sixers uniform, an Eagles parade, Terrell Owens signing with the Raiders, Daric Barton earning the ROY for Oakland…)

About sports, not titty. (Unless the titties, like in the case of Coach Parcells, are integral to the plot.)

One that does not -- nay, refuses! -- to hang out in locker rooms, because they smell really, really bad.

One that knows no celebrities, does not eat press box food, and isn't afraid to watch the games the same way that you do.

Unlike other sports sites, FTT pledges to never do the following:

1) Expose ourselves to co-workers via nude photos on our cell phone, and rationalize our behavior by citing the serious health conditions of our father. (Hi, Sean!)

2) Equate our devotion to the teams in our bias (for the record, mine are the A's, Eagles, and then a long ling way down to the Sixers) to the point where you can predict, with absolute certainty, what we're going to write before we write it.

3) Hire insufferable writers with bizarre eugenical beliefs, fire them for due cause, and then re-hire them several years later, because we just can't find any other insufferable writers. (Not exactly a hard hire, really.)

What do we ask in return? Precious little.

If you like any of the posts here, e-mail them to your friends, enemies, relatives and prison pen pals. Post comments when you feel so moved. If you'd like to join the writing staff and get in on this gravy-free gravy train, get in touch.

Because together -- and by together, I mostly mean me -- we can change the world. Or, at least, mine.

This has been an unpaid and non-political announcement.

1 comment:

athletics fan and runner said...

this blog rocks. I am so down!