NFL Week Two: Top 10 Ad Questions

10) Why do people pimping Miller Lite in bars care about the eyewear choices of customers, and how exactly does this translate to a reason to drink beer?

9) When the fine print for a stunt says "Do Not Attempt", does this refer to jumping out of a second story window, or eating a Burger King breakfast?

8) If you win free Outback Steakhouse for a year, is there any chance in hell that the restaurant would still be feeding a live person in 12 months?

7) Is the NFL viewer demographic really a match for people who use very, very precious iPad aps?

6) How long will BP keep buying ads to remind everyone how nice they are about that whole negligence causing environmental devastation thing?

5) What drugs were the marketing execs who greenlit the buy for "Legend of the Guardians", a PG kids movie about a mythical race of barn owls?

4) Why is Tom Brady so touchy about who touches the remote, and how does this help to sell a cable, Internet and phone access package?

3) How will a competing cable, Internet and phone package rock me like a hurricane, and why should a presumed technology solution be sold with 30 year old hair band music?

2) Why should I want to have the same television service of a Midas-y Russian douchebag with Liberace-level bearded ho action?

1) Why should I want to buy the car that's driven by anachronistic Revolutionary War re-enacters, even if this does make me feel proud to be a citizen of the place where my parents copulated?