Top 10 reasons why Ken Griffey Jr. should retire

10) Pretty sure that he doesn't need the extra pension money

9) When you can't stay awake long enough to pinch hit, that's a problem

8) Would save the Mariners the trouble of telling their fan base that they sent him to a farm upstate

7) When your OPS is less than three dozen player's slugging percentage, That's Not Good

6) In general, when you can't throw, field, run, hit for average or hit for power, you should probably find other work

5) No one cares if he gets hurt any more

4) Even Griff won't own Griff in his fantasy league

3) There are an ever-increasing number of Mariner Fans who won't remember him as anything but that terrible old guy

2) Getting those last 221 hits for 3,000 at his current pace would theoretically take until 2014, and break Craig Biggio and Pete Rose's record for Longest Death March To A Meaningless Number

1) Getting those last 133 home runs to become the all-time home run hitter, at his current pace, would, um, never happen, since he hasn't hit a home run in 2010