Top 12 consolations for the silver medal US hockey team

12) They've tarnished Martin Brodeur's legacy for good

11) Ryan Kesler still allowed to play for the Canucks

10) Unlike the victorious Canadians, they don't have to stay in Canada

9) Would have felt guilty after the mass suicides

8) You can always blame this on the 4-on-4 overtime rules

7) J.P. Parise (i.e., Zack's Canadian dad) doesn't have to be deported

6) Ryan Miller joins the pantheon of close-but-not-quite Buffalo sports heroe

5) At least the winning goal wasn't scored by some nobody

4) If the Habs mouth off too much, we can always invade

3) The team they lost to didn't have that many Frenchies on it

2) Silver goes better with that blue uniform anyway

1) Everyone in the U.S. can go back to not caring about hockey

(Oh, and puckheads? If you want to blame anyone for the loss, blame me. I finally tuned in to the Winter Games for the first time when it went to overtime.)