Top 10 developments of the US hockey team beating Canada

10) Martin Brodeur deemed no longer any good, eh

9) Ryan Miller to drape himself in flag, look for father

8) NHL to keep its players in future Olympics, since it's the only time that casual fans seems to care about hockey

7) US armed forces to invade and seize prime areas and oil rights, seeing how Canada will be too depressed to offer resistance

6) Older US stars like Mike Modano and Keith Tkachuk, who were not chosen for this team, to be deported

5) Snarky sports bloggers and people in your office to talk about hockey for the first time, like, ever

4) Brian Rafalski becomes this generation's Mike Eruzione, with all of the good will hockey skank poon that entails

3) Sidney Crosby to cry like a little Penguin

2) In future, NBC to give active consideration, but not actual execution, to televising the game in HD

1) Hockey to experience same lifetime surge in popularity in this country, just like the 1980 win, the 1996 World Cup win, the 2002 silver medal, and the 1999 Women's Soccer World Cup