Top 13 takeaways from the US World Cup Loss

13) The hardest crying will be from ESPN and ABC, who just saw their ratings for the rest of the tournament go into the toilet

12) All of the U.S. fans will feel better if Ghana goes on to beat those Uruguayan bastards

11) If Ghana does this again, we're just going to have to invade

10) Ricardo Clark might not be able to... well, actually, no one in the US will remember that it was his giveaway that led to Ghana's first half goal

9) Landon Donovan's marriage is said to be back on, which is a damn shame, seeing how so many women in America want to have Consolation Sex with him

8) In the future, maybe Benny Feilhaber can play the whole game, seeing how he made the whole team better, and was born in Brazil

7) The world now knows that the U.S. can play this game, but they do not know that they can defend in it, or prevent goals in early minutes

6) Fans in the U.S. will take the better part of an afternoon to get over this

5) The U.S. has never, it needs to be said, scored on a corner kick

4) Finally, we can stop eating all of these orange slices and Capri-Sun

3) The game united the country... into remembering just how much we hate to watch losers

2) As much as a U.S. fan might be disappointed, at least they aren't French or Italian

1) Now that the U.S. is out, we can go back to not caring about this game