Top 10 things to know before Celtics-Lakers Game Seven

10) Since any technical foul called in this game won't be disciplined until the utterly meaningless 2011 regular season, you can pretty much bet the house on Rasheed Wallace getting rung up

9) If the game is close, Andrew Bynum is planning to have his knees drained at every timeout

8) Since even the Celtics have admitted that Kendrick Perkins won't play, you can be pretty sure he's going to die

8) Between the ref puling, injury wringing and suck chants, both team's fan bases are really bringing their Super Obnoxious "A" game

7) Since the series has gone seven, the national audience has been blessed with the maximum possible exposure to "Grown Ups"

6) Now that the Celtics have activated Brian Scalabrine, the Lakers are just in for a world of eye hurt

5) This should be the last basketball game in North America where Adam Morrison has a good view

4) Your natural urge towards sympathy for Perkins to have to miss Game 7 is tempered by the fact that Perkins is, well, a big freaking douchebag

3) I, personally, can not sleep with the anticipation of how deep Mark Jackson will make his voiceover before commercials

2) The losing team's coach has to get his head shaved and leave town

1) As a final and irrefutable proof that God loves us, this series will end