Top 13 questions in regards to Marvin Harrison

If you missed the recent piece on the Marvelous One, um, don't. But you might want to read it in daylight, or in a secure room. Yikes.

13) If Harrison and Chris Henry had been drafted by each other's teams, would their relative living status be swapped?

12) Will Harrison be available to do voice work for the next installment of the Grand Theft Auto series, "GTA 4: Famous Athlete"?

11) Will the NFL refund all of its fine money to Chad Ochocinco under the little known "Maybe Being Quiet Isn't A Good Idea" rule?

10) What's the over-under on when Al Sharpton or Jesse Jackson calls a press conference to denounce, well, something?

9) Are we certain that Harrison didn't also kill Tupac and Biggie?

8) Does Harrison owe the writers of "The Wire" royalties?

7) Will Carmelo Anthony come down against Harrison's accusers?

6) How did Harrison hire famous deceased Eagle DT Jerome Brown to be his attorney? (There are two people with that name? Inconceivable!)

5) Will American gun makers protest Harrison for refusing to buy American?

4) Once again, where are the Second Amendment enthusiasts to have Harrison's back, and is anyone else noticing the general pattern of them not coming forward when the accused has more melanin in the skin?

3) If Harrison had been a little more vocal about his off-the-field habits during his playing career, would he have gotten a little more separation from defensive backs in the playoffs?

2) How much is Gilbert Arenas hoping that Harrison goes on a rampage to take him out of the spotlight?

1) If Harrison were still an active and valuable player, would the NFL or his team suspend him?