Top 12 reasons why Amar'e Stoudemire signed with the Knicks

12) Wants to be certain that he never, ever gets outplayed by the bench players again

11) After eight years of playing in Phoenix, was desperate to spend a winter in New York

10) Pretty sure that he can make everyone forget Eddy Curry

9) In the Eastern Conference in an up-tempo offense, he's going to make his fantasy owners very happy

8) He hates David Lee so much, he's going to New York just so he'll have to leave

7) Seems to have missed what happened to Shawn Marion's career ever since leaving Steve Nash

6) Can't get over the fact that the Suns once actually thought about improving the team by trading him

5) Knows that the team will either sign someone better than him to take the heat, or that he'll always have April through June off

4) So long as Danilo Gallinari is around, knows that he can't be accused of being the softest forward on the roster

3) Has always dreamed of playing with point guards the caliber of Chris Duhon and Eddie House

2) Knows that the only thing standing between him and big commercial endorsements is playing for the Knicks, his utter lack of charisma, and the certainty that he's never, ever going to win anything of consequence

1) Two words: Max Freaking Contract