One switch that is not under consideration at the moment: Moving Alfonso Soriano out of center field even though he began the night with a .234 average, no homers and one RBI. Piniella said the two had a "nice conversation" Monday and that Soriano is adamant about staying put. "We brought him in here to hit, and if center field is causing a problem, we want to eradicate that, but he feels very comfortable," Piniella said. -- Associated Press
Handler #4: Seriously. I can't even look at you right now.
Handler #3: Why don't you try again tomorrow?
Handler #2 (aside): What's with the old man?
(Update: Fonzie now has a hamstring problem. Cub-esque!)