One second to douchebaggery

As a thought exercise, I flipped on sports radio yesterday about 2:20 p.m. to see how long it would take before the seething cauldron of rage that is Philadelphia Fan would raise his ugly head. I knew the meatheads would use the most exciting ending to a Super Bowl that didn't involve Joe Montana as an excuse to bash the home squad and especially the much-put upon Donovan McNabb, but I wanted to see just how long it would take for the stupid to burn through my car speakers.

I first went to 610WIP, repository of all things mouth-breathing and anti-McNabb, but the show had gone to commercial. Then I flipped to ESPN950 and after listening for literally one second I heard the knuckle-dragging host complain that McNabb would never be able to lead a last-second drive like Roethlisberger and blah, blah, blah, yackity-schmackity. I'm sure the resident blather-monkey had poorly-thought out and generally stupid reasons for his "argument," but I had to flip on the CD player (I'm diggin' on Duffy these days) or slam into a telephone pole and kill myself. Anything to make it stop.

The local fishwrappers took their turns on the hate parade today, showing either remarkable restraint or a surprising lack of foresight in that they didn't have their anti-McNabb columns ready to run Monday no matter who won the game.

Look, I recognize that the man has his limitations, but goddamn, can't the sports media in this city write or talk about anything without ragging on #5? Is it simply impossible to enjoy a truly phenomenal football game without performing incredible mental gymnastics just to take a dump on the greatest QB in team history?

Bwah-ha-ha! Of course not. They call it "Negadelphia" for a reason.