I Will Then Set Myself On Fire
BEHOLD, Dear Readers and my fellow Blogfricans, the long-lost music video from my '90s rock and roll band. (No, really.)
I know you have questions.
1) Is that really you?
Yes.
2) No, seriously?
Yup. Nearly 15 years ago, but yes, yes, yes.
3) WTF?
Agreed.
4) No, seriously, dude, WTF?
You really want to know what the song is about?
5) Um...
When I was a musician (yes, that's me singing), I held a McJob at Penn. One day, I had to copy old law books, and one of the books was about the history of animal law. Animal law is what happened in Europe in the time before television when a pig that ate garbage munched an infant, or you were plagued by locusts, etc. People would actually dress the animals up and put them on trial.
6) Uh...
Yes, and also had trials when they caught someone buggering a beast. That's why the dancer has a tail. (0:45.)
7) Dude, WTF?
The song is from the point of view of an offending farmer. He takes the Marion Berry route of claiming the she-ass set him up. The town sees it differently, because, hey, that's one nice donkey. The whole song is based on a true story. Hence, the France graphic (0:18).
8) Were you high?
Later, but not during. We flew in a dancer who worked with Prince; I met her at a music conference. The whole thing was shot in a day. It even got some UHF airplay back in the day. We figured, hey, chick with a tail and FIRE! FIRE! FIRE!, it was bound to make us famous. Or something.
9) OK, OK, I'm actually watching it. What a train wreck. How did you do that whole burning at the stake thing at the end of it?
I had myself burned at the stake.
10) Seriously?
Seriously. Second degree burns, melted the hair off me in some places. One of the townspeople -- and all of these folks were friends, fans and fellow musicians in the Philly music scene, it was like a Ren Faire party -- really got into her motivation and spit in my face. It was a cooling moment, and the highlight of the day, really.
11) Um... dude. Why are you putting this up in public?
For your amusement, clearly. Go ahead and laugh. I was young and stupid. Now, I'm old and stupid.
12) And if I like the music, and want to know if you could get the band back together...
Ah, shaddup.
6 comments:
#*$)#$*)(*&!~~~!!!!
:) It's great stuff, except for that idiot ruffian overacting from 1:34 to 1:44.
. . . I don't . . . what . . . I . . . owww.
I suppose it's too late now that this is online, but you should destroy this before your kids see it. If you must tell them about your career in the entertainment industry, say you can't show them video because you were the hardest working power bottom in BDSM gay porn for seven years. They'll be scarred, but not as badly as they will be when they this. "My father nearly killed himself shooting a video about French animal rape! Bobby will never take me to the prom now!"
You assume that I want them dating. Consider this my artistic alternative to the shotgun.
I hate to tell ya, Dave, but if this was the only song a person ever heard by TETY, he'd assume that you were a progrock band.
Sorry,
-Z
(shrugging)
Between the cello, viola, saxophone, and Celtic harp - along with actual trained musicians on the more "rock" instruments - I'd always thought TETY was more alt-prog than alternative...which, now that I think of it, may have been part of why fame was elusive.
Thanks for posting the video, BTW; I'd seen it before, but now I can add it to the collection. ;-) Yes, I still have all that stuff, including the T-shirts, 10+ years and 2500+ miles later.
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