A few questions for NFL advertisers

> When Roger Ebert calls a movie "the best in the 'Mummy' series", do you suspect that he was being less than straight forward?

> Why does the only African American Packer fan bleed paint?

> I understand that NFL game coverage has a contractual obligation to show fans dressed in costume, but why do they need to be in commercials now?

> How much gold does Beyonce Knowles have to suck until she overcomes her self-esteem issues?

> What was the Jane Seymour media buyer high on?

> Did anyone else miss, kind of in a "Stockholm Syndrome" way, the Toyota "Save By Zero" and DirecTV "Chevy Chase" ads today, and do you think their absence has anything to do with the Eagles' resurgence?

> Do people really buy cars if they have different colored tags on them, if Denis Leary does some of his usual schtick, if it's got a big bow on it, or if it's being compared to some noxious childhood memory?

> Has anyone ever made a purchase decision based on which company has provided the blimp coverage?

> Does the NFL Network only broadcast on phones?

> Has anyone ever bought their own electric razor, or have they all been gifts?