Top 10 Ways John Madden Likes To Service Brett Favre

10. Apologizing for back breaking bad decisions as being just part of the whole package

9. On both knees, looking up as if a child in the most rapturous of prayer

8. Espousing the belief that no one, with the possible exception of Tony Romo, has fun playing quarterback ("fun" = "white QB with improvisational skills")

7. Reverse spoon style, so that post-coital cuddling can be achieved with an economy of motion

6. Pretending that any time the Packers lose, it must be because of the lack of a consistent running game. rather than from Favre's own mistakes

5. Role-playing like a geisha, with foot-binding, whiteface makeup and girlish giggling

4. Refusing to discuss whether or not Favre's constant retirement speculation hurts his team

3. "Old-time-football style" -- we won't get into the details, but it involves blood, sweat, "mud" and tears

2. Citing Favre's consecutive starts streak as an umabigious source of awe and wonder that's just about the individual, rather than a team accomplishment involving a long history of good to great pass protection by the Packers offensive line

1. With food