Sunday, April 29, 2012

Top 10 takeaways from the Derrick Rose Injury

10) It's all Tom Thibodeau's fault, since he's the only coach in the NBA who plays injury prone starters in blowouts

9) The Sixers totally wanted to play the Bulls instead of the Heat, so they could get a better view of a gruesome injury

8) Rose now becomes the youngest reigning NBA MVP to ever become totally irrelevant

7) Michael Wilbon thinks that the NBA is blame for this from the sprint season, because that's what an idiot thinks

6) Chicago is totally different without Rose, despite the fact that they were without him for most of the year, went 18-9 without him, and probably weren't going to beat the Heat with or without him

5) Chicago Fan is absolutely despondent over this injury, and will remain so for the next 2-3 playoff series

4) The fact that this totally opens the door for Boston yet again is proof that God really has it in for NBA Fans

3) Everyone in America should feel bad about this, since it means Rose won't play in the Olympics, and we all care so much about that

2) Anyone who thinks that this means the Sixers will actually give the Bulls a challenge now hasn't been watching the Sixers for the past three months

1) Somewhere in Oregon, a shadowy figure in a Nike executive office is watching the footage of Rose getting hurt and laughing like a Bond supervillain

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