Top 10 takeaways fron Round 1 of the NFL Draft

10) Just ten minutes between picks decreased the ESPN yammering by 33%, which makes life 33% better

9) Miami proved that they could overpay for a QB that didn't come from Philadelphia first

8) Dallas got a good CB, which by the rules of NFL hype means that Dallas got the best CB in the history of the universe

7) Eagle Fan is so happy to get Fletcher Cox, they're going to be really pissed off at me for giving him the nickname Chubby

6) By drafting Michael Floyd, the Cardinals will give Kevin Kolb great WRs to miss all over the field

5) Romeo Crennel stuck his neck way out for Dontari Poe, which is very impressive given that he actually has no neck

4) Roger Goodell really enjoys the draft, since it's the only time in an NFL player's career when anyone even pretends to be happy to see him

4) The Giants got a fumble-prone RB to replace their fumble-prone RB, but since the new one is small enough to be expected to go down on first contact, it's OK

3) The Vikings are very excited to get two immediate starters, as if you have to be a first-round pick to crack the lineup for this juggernaut

2) Dre Kirkpatrick said he had a feeling that the Bengals would draft him, in that he's got a lot of crimes on his to do list

1) This drat was the most epic, amazing and talent-rich one in the last 12 months