Top 10 reasons why the Nets walked away from the Carmelo Anthony trade

10) For some reason, 'Melo just didn't seem all that interested in being paid in rubles

9) Nets would not commit to the No Snitching commitment

8) Billy King was unable to get Anthony to agree to one of his spectacularly crippling contracts

7) Kind of wanted to see the Nuggets have their own Star Walks Hangover Season

6) Nets owner Mikhail Prokhorov, for some reason, values secrecy in his negotiations, and does not brook failure lightly

5) Just couldn't say goodbye to the riveting and emerging talent that has taken them to their 11-31 start

4) Completing the trade might have involved a computer in some way, and Prokhorov doesn't use them (no, seriously)

3) For some reason, didn't want to mortgage the franchise for a guy that has never gone to an NBA Finals and a new backcourt that's five years past its Detroit Basketball prime

2) Keeps the dream of Troy Murphy in Newark alive

1) Ensures that when Melo goes to the Knicks as a free agent in the off-season (assuming, of course, no nuclear winter lockout), the team can keep its historial standing as the area's second and easily ignored little brother