Top 10 reasons why the Dolphins are letting Tony Sparano twist in the breeze

10) Never really believed that sunglasses excuse, or stopped trying to spell his name "Soprano"

9) Can't understand why an offense with matching Chads at QB would have a hard time scoring points

8) Only watched the home games, so they think the team is one of the worst in the league

7) Feel that if Jim Harbaugh turns them down, it won't be awkward at all to go back to Tony

6) 7-9 coaches don't deserve respect, or dignity, or straight answers

5) Just haven't been able to get a hold of him, as cell phone reception in south Florida is really, really bad

4) Waiting to see what Brandon Marshall and Ricky Williams says first

3) Sparano has put on weight, and won't let them do that thing with the thing any more

2) It's not as if the man is going to get another head coaching job, since only NFL announcers are still impressed by the Wildcat

1) Now that Bill Parcells doesn't begin and end their existence, no one remembers why they hired him in the first place