Top 10 reasons why the Nets are trying to trade for Joe Johnson

10) Getting an aging shooting guard is totally how Boston won a championship

9) By trading off all of their expiring contracts they get to stop having all of those annoying possibilities of getting better

8) Didn't want to go away from the off-season empty-handed, regardless of what winds up in the hand

7) Keeps him from Mark Cuban, also known as the only other dumb money billionaire in the Association

6) Trying to establish themselves as true Brooklyn hipsters by overpaying for mostly useless retro artifacts

5) Would rather not have the experience of dealing for Dwight Howard, then having him ask for a trade in 18 to 24 months

4) Johnson has the biggest contract in the league (no, seriously), which must make him the best player

4) By making this trade, the Nets can prove to Deron Williams that they are absolutely committed to making him the centerpiece of a team that never really contends, which is what he wants most of all

3) With Gerald Wallace joining Johnson and Williams, they are building a great open court team for 2008

2) Think that by making this move, and then matching whatever offer comes Brook Lopez's way, that they can construct that super-thin injury-prone team that's all the rage these days

1) Haven't actually watched Johnson play basketball for several years, and haven't checked out what happens to 31-year-old shooting guards that rely on athleticism