Top 10 reasons why Dwight Howard wants to be traded to Brooklyn

10) Doesn't quite understand that even in a new location, they are still the Nets

9) Didn't quite get the point of signing the option for the final year of his contract on March 15

8) Would do anything to get away from Big Baby Davis and his constant "When I was in Boston" comments

7) The thrill of getting Stan Van Gundy and Otis Smith fired is gone

6) It's been at least four months since his last trade request, so he's pretty much due

5) Thinks that more back surgery would arouse suspicion

4) Pretty sure that the Nets' Russian tycoon owner can get him all kinds of interesting trim

3) Hasn't heard that Deron Williams wants out

2) In love with that new logo, hipster lifestyle, and dream of hanging out with Jay-Z

1) Would really like to lose in an early playoff round while having his teammates blamed in a new town