Wear an ugly jacket

A quick list of why golf can actually be fun to watch, if only when spring is in the air and we haven't seen so much of this as to be bored (yet)...

1) A former caddy who doesn't speak English wins after scrambling from a place where people like me hit the ball

2) An old white man faltered, breaking the hearts of all of the other old white men who had to be happy once that uppity Tiger Woods failed

3) We didn't have to watch the Augusta club officials have to fit that ugly thing around Phil Mickelson and his man boobs

4) Watching the reaction shot from the families of the players that failed, knowing that Dad's just had a life-defining failure

5) Getting to watch the Lemur and others talk about how wonderful the tournament was, knowing that no one remembers the ones that Tiger doesn't win