Top 10 NFL Week 14 Ad Questions

Unhealthy Commitment To Phone

10) Why is Target adding to the nation's helium shortage, and making Santa's job of delivering Christmas presents even more difficult?

9) How long has Wells Fargo inspired snowmen to sacrament-esque nose sacrifice?

8) How many men have to die before Coors Light gets a traditional distribution system?

7) If you are involved with someone who breaks up with you over missed text messages, aren't you secretly thankful for the poor technology?

6) Why is Santa giving away new cars to horribly smug designer children who are not old enough to drive?

5) Does Michael Jordan routinely hang out with men who wear cats?

4) Is anyone else disturbed by how the Subway pastrami/monkey's paw sandwich never changes its appearance, no matter what awful violence happens to its owner?

3) Why isn't one of the stated side effects of Viagra color-blindness?

2) Is Dodge particularly insecure about how their product stacks up to a VW Passat?

1) Should I be worried about how my life might turn into a nightmarish hellscape involving nudity, bondage and ferrets, since I own a Droid?