Top 10 NFL Week 7 Ad Questions

Buy a Fiat, get the crabs

10) Now that Papa John's has invented the pizza-sized cookie, can you get them with diabetic testing strips?

9) Why do people who drive Fiats put up with crabs pinching their bikini asses?

8) Does Geico also insure screaming sentient trees?

7) If I start playing Call of Duty, will the lines between game and reality blur until I become incapable of going to work?

6) How sad is it that James Earl Jones is now reduced to stilted line readings in cell phone ads?

5) Did the creation of a signature dance cause Falcons WR Julio Jones to suffer a season-ending injury?

4) Does the NFL Network feel that, if they do not tell us they make football a half dozen times, we'd forget?

3) Is the presence of questionable celebrity required to make drinking Miller Lite pleasurable?

2) Are there enough fetishy design nerds to support the existence of the new iPhone?

1) If I get new phone tech from Verizon, do I have to become an out of control Star Wars nerd?