Top 10 takeaways from the Nationals' NLDS collapse to the Cardinals

None of these clothes are now owned

10) Yes, this was all directly related to the incredible karmic problem of shutting down Stephen Strasburg

9) There is no truth to the rumor that Davey Johnson has changed his first name to Grady

8) The only fan base happier than the Cardinals after this game was Phillies Fan, who enjoys their pain to a frankly uncomfortable degree

7) Adam Wainwright chose to spend the celebration the same way he spent the rest of the evening (in the fetal position in a supply closet, sobbing)

6) Next year's Pete Kozma Bobblehead Day will be the first one where the doll is life-sized

5) If the Cardinals repeat, they really should give Edwin Jackson a full share, as he's truly earned it

4) Carlos Beltran is a destroyer of worlds in October

3) Someone really needs to make sure that Drew Stroren doesn't have access to a belt or shoelaces right about now

2) If Robert Griffin The Concussed gets hurt again this weekend, Congress really should cease sports in the District as a humanitarian action

1) Somewhere in Southern California, Albert Pujols is crying a little, but cheering up again when he looks out at his swimming pool filled with money