Top 10 reaons why Yu Darvish doesn't think he deserves an All-Star Game slot

10) Reached to own himself in his fantasy league, and feels that the pick is totally the reason why his team's not winning

9) Doesn't quite understand that the rest of the parks he's now pitching in are a lot easier to work in than the Arlington Launching Pad

8) Like many Japanese, has a very questionable work ethic and wants to avoid any extra days at the job

7) Doesn't want to end up like Neftali Feliz

6) Somehow isn't seeing an extra trip to Kansas City in July as any kind of a reward

5) Thinks that if he goes, he'll have to pitch a complete game, just to impress Nolan Ryan

4) Was really hoping to spend the 3-day break to fly halfway back to Japan

3) Feels much shame for his 1.38 WHIP, which has brought much dishonor to the Darvish name

2) Believes that no rookie should be able to be in the All Star Game, and that to cross that line would show a critical lack of humility and what the Japanese call wa

1) Already feels terrible about taking one American job, and doesn't want to double the damage