Thursday, May 13, 2010

Top 11 Reasons Why the Cavs Quit in Game Six

With 2:06 left in Game Six, LeBron James dunked the basketball to close the lead to 7. The Cavs (a) didn't score again, (b) commit a defensive foul to try to stop the clock, (c) jump for rebounds, or (d) show any evidence that they wanted to be standing upright. Why did the team decide to only play 46 minutes?

11) Knew that they didn't stand a chance in one of the two games this year where Rasheed Wallace tried

10) Watched enough film of the 2009-10 Celtics to know that they never, ever had problems finishing games

9) LeBron's flight to New York, Chicago, New Jersey, Dallas, Denver and Los Angeles was leaving soon

8) Halfway through the fourth quarter, coach Mike Brown told them that he was coming back next year, no matter what

7) When two-fifths of the starting line up is Antwan Jamison and Shaquille O'Neal, you should not expect much in the way of stout behavior in an elimination game

6) Team was really only trying until James got his triple double

5) Team just wanted to be closer to JJ Hickson on the bench, who played for less than a minute in this game, despite being, unlike O'Neal and Zydrunas Ilgauskas, alive

4) Knew that the Celtics' 63.6% free-throw percentage in this game was just going to get better with more attempts

3) Really didn't want to hear any more of Boston Fan's devastatingly clever chants

2) Wanted to give sports blogosphere something, anything, to talk about other than LeBron's free agent status

1) As a final coup de grace for Cleveland Fan to make sure that he not only put his head in the oven, but also shot himself in the head while swallowing pills

1 comment:

The Truth said...

Let me be the first to welcome Mr. James and Coach Cal to Chicago.