Monday, January 20, 2014

Top 12 Consolations for Patriot Fans

Forks Are Fun
12) This wasn't a home loss where the nation would have seen a huge number of you leave at halftime

11) It's fairly impossible that this team will field as anemic a group of WRs next year, assuming that aspect of team management isn't some kind of psychological experiment

10) The fact that Tom Brady is a .500 playoff QB in his last 16 starts isn't widely known or discussed

9) You haven't really ever rooted very hard for this team, since they won with running plays

8) That's probably the last time you'll ever have to worry about Danny Amendola's lack of health again

7) LeGarrette Blount is a free agent, so he can break someone else's heart next year

6) Losing to Peyton Manning is easier when he's in the wrong laundry

5) As just about every single one of you felt compelled to say, pitchers and catchers report in yada yada days

4) The longer your team goes without winning a Super Bowl, the more you can pretend to be tortured or less hated by the rest of the country

3) You didn't lose to Eli Manning in a way that will haunt your dreams and be in highlight films for the rest of your life

2) Seattle is physical enough to give Wes Welker that career-ending concussion that would make you tingly all over

1) Having lost back to back AFC Championship games makes you just like those Rex Ryan Jets, and that's a great trend to emulate

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