Top 10 reasons why the Lakers hired Mike D'Antoni

Mike D'Antoni Knows What Matters

10) Really wanted to recreate the magic of his last stop with the Knicks

9) He promised to be nothing like Mike Brown, in that he's white, cares about offense, and won't make talented isolation players run a Princeton offense

8)  Still remember how his Phoenix teams were so dominant, especially in the playoffs

7) Are convinced that if Metta World Peace just gets into a Seven Seconds Or Less Offense, everything will work out for him

6) When you have four established stars who don't really want to play fundamental defense, it's best to just set them up in a system where no one can figure that out

5) Kobe is sure to get better from the three-point line when he's given the green light to do it as often as he wants

4) Pushing the tempo is going to do wonders for Dwight Howard's back and Pau Gasol's paunch

3) Have finally gotten to watching those Finals tapes from last year, when Miami won by going small, without realizing that no one on their team really plays very much like LeBron James

2) Up-tempo basketball is sure to result in the only thing that Laker Fan cares about, which is meeting that 100 point Taco Threshold

1) Somehow weren't up for a home-only head coaching situation with a senior citizen, which was their other possible choice