Friday, November 30, 2012

The First Rule of Cons

Scum Comes In All Sizes
Two quotes for your consid- eration today. The first comes from Indians GM Mark Shapiro, confronting a season ticket holder who asked the relatively straightforward question of why he should renew, since the 2013 team looks a lot like the bad 2012 one...

“I told him if the sole reason, the only reason, for renewing is predicated on us winning, then they shouldn’t come. I stand by that. Baseball has to mean more than just being a fan when you win."

So if you pay a few thousand bucks, do it for the love of the game, Indian Fan. The game is more than enough. You're lucky the Tribe tries at all, really.

And this little tidbit from Jets' linebacker Bart Scott, on the opinions of the paying customers who pay at least $50 a ticket to see him and the other merrymakers perform acts heretofore unseen on a football field:

"At the end of the day, if you made it to be able to put an NFL uniform on, then you are one of the best athletes in the world. The person yelling at you probably was picked last in dodgeball all through high school. So do you care about the opinion of them? No."

Left unsaid, of course, as to why you would care about the opinion of a guy who will be lucky to be walking in his mid '40s, sane in his '50s, and financially solvent in his dotage. Oh, and plays for the laughingstock of the league.

Now, the fun part about both of these quotes is that they are basically saying the same thing, which is... that if you are paying to watch a bad product, you should just shut up and smile while you do it. Since you were stupid enough to buy a ticket in the first place.

And the really awful part about both quotes... is that they are more or less representing the current state of affairs in the media, and the sports world in general.

Boo the team? Some swell near you will text your unruly behavior to the stadium police to have you removed.

Advocate the dismissal of the coach? You must be a radio station level mouth breather who can't possibly know what the national media swells know, which is that this wonderful man is the best you could possibly hope for.

Question authority in any fashion that could be considered disrespectful? Well, you must not be much of a fan of the sport.

And, well, you can hardly expect anything better from them. Every sport has had labor issues and work stoppages and drug scandals and skyrocketing ticket prices, and nothing -- nothing at all -- has dissuaded the raging popularity of just about every league.

So, well... why should Shapiro, or Scott, or any number of other ass clowns that will put their face into a microphone while forgetting the first rule of cons, say anything remotely respectful of the people who indirectly pay their salaries? (The first rule of cons: don't remind the mark that they are being conned.)

Dealers don't respect addicts. Con men don't respect marks.

But there is one saving grace in all of that...

They don't win anything of consequence, either.

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