Top 10 NFL Week 9 Ad Questions

10) Will our troops overseas be more likely to come home safely, now that they know there is a free Bloomin' Onion waiting for them?

9) Is there something about jewelry from Jared that's especially appealing to hags?

8) Does any legitimate business use GoDaddy for Web services, or is there really that much money in Web work for soft porn enthusiasts?

7) Has there ever been a Ninja Assassin (solo, of course; more than one makes them as weak as kittens) who wasn't (a) the best, and (b) the biggest badass ever?

6) When the Bud Light redhead uses the nail gun to attach the boutonniere, how many people were maimed for life before the advertiser put up the graphic telling us to not attempt this?

5) Does Lipitor's side effects include baldness and wandering around like a castrato?

4) Is the fact that you can call Flava Flav supposed to make me want to change my cell phone plan?

3) Is following a green cursor as it goes down the sidewalk like a cult member really the best analogy for investing?

2) What will happen if my phone doesn't get me, but instead, just performs as a phone?

1) Isn't the fact that Honda has enough money to make musical highways, and make and show ads about musical highways, proof that Honda is charging people too damn much for their cars?