Taking The Test

So in the middle of my Twitter feed, there's a link to a simple four question poll, devised by a division of Harvard Medical School, to determine whether you've got a problem. And since I'm just the kind of over-thinking person who can't leave well enough alone and just enjoy a hobby... let's take the test.

During the past 12 months, have you become restless, irritable, or anxious when trying to stop/cut down on gambling?

I play poker, Doc. If you don't have this condition as you wait for cards, or watch your aces get cracked, or grip during a tournament... well, I'm not sure you are alive. But as I don't think that this is the manner in which you are intending the question, let's take a pass on it and say no.

During the past 12 months, have you tried to keep your family or friends from knowing how much you gambled?

On every single bluff, yes. Otherwise, not so much.

During the past 12 months did you have such financial trouble as a result of your gambling that you had to get help with living expenses from family, friends or welfare?

Wow, that's hardcore. No, but really, you can do that? Tell me more.

And after one last question about reducing the amount of gambling that you do, this assessment...

Answering "yes" to one of the previous questions indicates that, currently, you are at increased risk for developing or experiencing gambling-related problems. You are not alone. About 1% of adults and 5% of college students report that they have experienced a severe gambling-related problem during their lifetime.

Hey, just one out of 100 adults, and 1 out of 20 college students? We've got a long way to go before we really experience market saturation in this gambling thing, Doc. Let me go take the amount I was going to spend on my next tournament, and put it on a casino stock sale instead. Thanks for the tip!