The San Francisco Giants Are Asshats

Toolish

To the right, you see an actual licensed shirt that you can buy from the Giants.

No, really.

You see, the franchise that has a universally admired ballpark, two recent rings, virtual domination over the airways and broadcast rights over one of the most prosperous areas of the country, and a long-standing fairly tenuous hold over the San Jose market, therefore cutting off the A's only obvious move to stay in the area and to avoid scarring their fan base for good...

Has decided to make a few extra bucks being a douchebag via swag, and to give all of their fans an opportunity to join in the fun.

You know who has too much class to do this? The Yankees and Mets. The Cubs and White Sox. The Angels and Dodgers and Padres. The Jets and Giants. The Raiders and Niners. The Knicks and Nets. The Lakers and Clippers. A pretty wide cross-section of sports ownership groups, many of them ran by guys who are not generally known for good decision making.

And then there's the Giants.

You know, the franchise that got its ballpark built on dot-com thievery (Webvan, if anyone remembers it, and the innumerable investors that lost everything from putting stock in that mess) and the era defining steroid cheater. The franchise of people who like a place more than they like the game. The franchise that signs one of the biggest free-agent bust / poison pill contracts ever in Barry Zito, and then watches him bunch all of his good starts into one brief burst in 2012 to get them a second random ring. The franchise that moved from New York, but since it wasn't Brooklyn, no one kept a vigil for them back East. The franchise that has still, despite all of their recent success and 3 to 4X payroll advantage for the past 10 to 15 years, far fewer World Series wins, even if you only want to count the past 40-odd years when both teams were in the area.

Yeah, no one mentions the elephant. Which is why Michael Lewis and Brad Pitt and the best seller lists and Oscar nominations went to a book about them. Which is why they've made the playoffs and won their division far more often, along with developing Hall of Fame talent like Reggie Jackson, Ricky Henderson and Rollie Fingers, and any number of guys who have gotten consideration (Dave Stewart, Mark McGwire, Jose Canseco) or will get future votes (Miguel Tejada, Tim Hudson, Jason Giambi, Billy Beane).

But by all means, Giants, sell merch for cheap shade, in a way that no other franchise does, while being exceptional asshats on any number of other fronts. Poke at the very small subset of the Bay area populace that roots for a team that, well, does not impact your revenue in any way, but does live on the less prosperous side of the Bay. And show everyone involved just how much class and decorum you have, despite your higher money and station in your life.

Because that's what you are, and what you do. And it's as plain as the shirt that you sell.