Burn Rothman Orthopedics to The Ground Before They Get Us All Killed

We Hear You, Rothman

 As a part-time (well, sometimes part time, sometimes full) rideshare driver, I listen to sports on the radio. And as a marketing and advertising pro, I know that radio advertising is hard. You have to write a script, hire voiceover actors, get the levels right, cut it to time and do a bunch of direct marketing tricks. It’s an art. A lesser one, but an art.

Which means that when you get it done, you don’t change it very much. You also are not hitting an amazing demographic, so there isn’t money for refreshes, and the ads get replayed. A lot. Finally, as an analog medium, you aren’t getting success metrics that allow for easy testing and more creative.

So, set up done? It’s time to talk about Rothman Orthopedics.

This is a local medical practice that caters to aging people (aren’t we all) with chronic health issues that they’d like to fix. The tag line is “Don’t be the old you. Be the Old You.”  

Capitalization assumed, as it’s confusing enough without it.

Which they execute with a conversation between time travelers, seemingly, who relate to the younger person what their diminished life is like now. OK, questionable use of time travel (tell me the Super Bowl winner please, Old Me, so I can get some bets down? Or maybe chuck me a note with winning lottery numbers, or the name of the crypto-coin I can cheat people with?) … but so be it. Health it is.

Here’s the problem – the Old You? Sounds *thrilled* to not be doing stuff. “We are getting pretty darned good at sitting,” he says, as if he’s found the answer to the world’s problems, when Younger You asks just what, in fact, they do now instead of the things they used to like.

Side note: how is the Rothman Institute supposed to cure the Older You’s fear of jellyfish so they can go swimming again? I thought you people fixed bodies, not minds or oceans.

Now, I know what you are thinking – it’s just a dumb radio spot that you’ve heard so many times that it has crowded out Kars 4 Kids in your head. No, and yes, I just put that in your head, in what is basically the War Crime Edition of Rickrolling, but let’s move on.

I’m here to tell you it is an *excellent* spot. Rothman Orthopedics isn’t interested in reaching people with small issues that could become worse – they are interested in reaching people with big problems that they can no longer ignore.

After all, your wonky shoulder can be ignored. Your total lack of mobility? Not so much. The ad is making you want to just sit! Sitting sounds so wonderful!

And it’s sick and evil and wrong and needs to be stopped.

Either through lawsuits, Congressional action, or my personal favorite, torches and pitchforks.

The latter is simpler, makes for better TV, and is excellent cardio.

Be the New You! The one that gets this radio ad off the air. With fire.

Thanks!