Top 12 reasons why the NFL needs to create a spring league

Every year, the lack of spring football -- by which I mean real, honest to goodness football, rather than some nonsense in a closet, wrestling-esque silliness or foreign force-feeding -- pisses me off. In a country where the NFL just utterly dominates the sporting consciousness, then goes away for the majority of the year, it's Just Stupid. And it will stop any year now, because markets are like that, and even the first year XFL drew reasonable ratings. So why not start it up now, now, now and get the following benefits?

12. For the sheer hilarity of fantasy drafts with tons of unknown players, followed up by weeks of Toss Darts point spread picks

11. No matter how bad the play is, it will get higher ratings than the NHL

10. Would allow the NFL an easy and wonderfully backhanded way to cover the LA market

9. Makes my rocking of the retro-cool Philadelphia Stars hoodie earn your worship and respect, rather than your respect and worship

8. Stops cold the weeks at a time when the mainstream American sports public has to actually think, however briefly, about basketball

7. Prevents tens of millions of football fans from having to interact with their families, which, really, is all to the best

6. Takes the gambling industry off the list of businesses begging for a government bailout

5. Shuts up megalopolises that say they really want/deserve/will cry or sue for a second NFL franchise

4. Fun's fun, but seriously, Ohio really deserves a professional football team

3. It would make many criminally underused new NFL stadiums be of use for 20 dates a year, rather than 10

2. Gets some of the most violent offenders in the country off the streets for weeks at a time in the spring

1. As soon as it gets popular, the NFL Network would get more games to black out

Kei Yankee

This is the living definition of an MLB+ team; the ability to take a $46 million flyer on a pitcher, and when he doesn't work out, stash him in AAA without the fan base even really thinking a second thought about it. Of course, when Carl Pavano is scheduled to make $10 million this year for throwing as many innings for the team as you and I will, eating bad contracts is something of an art form.

That would be the story of the New York Yankees and Kei Igawa, last year's Japanese import that thudded worse than the Matthew Broderick Godzilla film, with a 6.25 ERA... and with 14 games (12 starts) that only took up 67.2 innings, and a 1.67 WHIP. it's not like there was a bad outing or two that made the numbers look worse than they were. On the hill, he looked like a nibbler control pitcher with a telegraphed change-up, rather than a good strikeout option, which is what he projected from his past career in Japan.

In spring training this year, Igawa has thrown four scoreless innings, though the last outing was walk-filled and ugly. He's probably destined for AAA no matter what he does in camp, given how the Yankees have younger and more exciting options, April will probably only see work for him as a long man out of the bullpen, and they are going to want to see a lot more than a few good weeks to wash the taste of last year out of their mouth...

But well, this is the difference between the Yankees and (nearly) everyone else. If Igawa was in camp for more than 2/3rds of the teams in MLB, given the outlay, he'd have a starting job in a rotation, and in some places, maybe as the #3 starter. In the Bronx, he's a mystery to be considered later, and a possible ace in the hole.

The Crying Game

You know it's March each year when the weather gets a little warmer, kids are on Spring Break and Roy Williams is crying at a press conference. Every year (except when he won in 2004 he didn't cry - strange) the same thing from "Ol Roy."

As a Kansas alum (full disclosure here), I'm a fan of what he has been able to accomplish as a coach. I hate the way he left KU after saying he was going to stay there, but that is another post entirely. What I could never stand was his need to cry after losing in the tourney ever year. It almost feels like a canned performance now. Same tears, same corny lines that nobody believes anymore. He needs a new speachwriter. Let me help you correct some of your tired lines from Sunday as you were Weepy Guy at the podium again Roy.

1. "I would give every cent I have right now for my team to be out there cutting down those nets and feeling those feelings that Georgetown’s players are feeling." Really? You would give away all your money, putting your family's security at risk, just so you could go to the Final Four with this team? Um, yeah. Make sure you at least keep a bag full of dimes so you can still buy that Coca-Cola you love so much. Next time try this line:

"Man it hurts when you lose. I really wish this group of guys could feel how great it is to go to the Final Four. This is very dissapointing for all of us." There - believable.

2. "We just didn’t make enough shots down the stretch today." This is an area that Roy has always been similar to Coach K in - giving blame without being completely direct about it. It's never his fault for blowing a 10, 15 or 20 point lead by adjusting his game plan, the players just didn't execute that plan well enough. More example from Sunday:

"We took one three across from our bench that I thought was guarded."

"...we came down and got a wide open three and I didn’t even want it because it was so early in the shot clock but it missed and all of a sudden they dunk it on the other end..."

"I was not ecstatic with a couple of the shots."

"I don’t think there was a single play that I diagrammed to intentionally take a three. It was a second or third option. "

OK, Roy, we get it. You're players didn't execute, it couldn't have been your game plan or lack of adjusting it. But instead of indirectly throwing them under the bus, how about this?

"I think we could have executed a little better, and I think I could have adjusted to the game better as well. We'll learn from this and I expect great things from us next year if all these kids come back."

3. "You know, I said I would give almost anything, and I mean that, to have my guys out there, but I’ll take coaching these kids. We lost, and I wouldn’t trade my kids for anybody."

Come on, Roy, nobody is buying the gosh shucks Huckleberry Hound routine anymore. You "traded" your players at KU when you went to UNC. Save it. And the crying. Enough already. Yes your team worked hard, your staff worked hard, you worked hard, but to cry every year? Try this next year to explain the real reason you're crying.

"Now I have to go explain to Dean why we lost again."

Now buck up and go have a Coke.