Top 10 takeaways from Mariano Rivera's Injury

Woopsie

10) The team is completely devastated by the loss, and will somehow have to console themselves with their obscene salaries, annual trip to the playoffs, and seemingly endless flow of corporate and cable TV cash

9) That's the last time you will see a high priced reliever shag fly balls ever again

8)There's no truth to the rumor that upon hearing the news, Trevor Hoffman grabbed a baseball and started warming up

7) GM Brian Cashman is now totally on board with that Rafael Soriano signing

6) It's completely unfair, unprecedented and tragic when a positively ancient player gets hurt randomly

5) Conspiracy theorists will note the timing of the injury during the Roger Clemens trial

4) The time off will give him the opportunity to get that second pitch he needs to be truly effective

3) If the end is a cart ride in Kansas City, that's clearly more tragic than how Babe Ruth and Lou Gehrig went out

2) The respect of baseball fans worldwide was shown in a mad rush of fantasy baseball players to their league's waiver wire

1) Now that he's been hurt with a season and possibly career-ending injury, we will begin untold hours of media coverage that will add nothing more to your understanding of what happened than this sentence