Top 10 NFL Week 15 Ad Questions

10) Why do I want to buy a mobile phone from a provider that makes their products in a pink-haired midget sweatshop?

9) If I get wish-granted powers from using State Farm coverage, how does that routinely avoid pornography?

8) Do Wal-Mart's retarded cow customers all react to price-matching offers by looking like they are about to have a bowel movement in the middle of the store?

7) Why does Ford think it's a good idea for Mike Rowe to harass people at the mall?

6) If I buy a pair of Pumas, will they stay on my feet, or will they self-replicate, stick to the ground, and plot a course for any pursuer?

5) Can someone please stop the iPhone from littering the world with app balloons?

4) How does behaving like a tool to Santa Claus help to sell electronics, especially given the fact that presents from Santa are free?

3) If you are intrigued by the leather inside a Jeep, aren't you kind of, well, a freaky pervert that usually doesn't get their needs taken care of in mass market adertising?

2) Do I have to believe in a creepy Santa to buy my woman something from Kay?

1) Is there some federal law requiring 1 out of every 3 seasonal ads to use the dance of the sugar plum fairy music?