Execution

As part of my role as the World's Oldest Sports Blogger, I need to point out the following: Bernard Hopkins is older than me. By a substantial amount.

He is, in fact, 43 years of age, and while part of that time (nearly 5 years) was spent in state custody for armed robbery -- and hence, not being spent in the meat grinder world of the ring -- that's still an absurd age to be in a boxing ring for money.

Tonight, he ensured that he can continue to pursue that profession. And then some.

Against a highly regarded fighter in his prime (Kelly Pavlik), The Executioner didn't just survive. He dominated. It went the distance, and was never in doubt.

Here's how good Hopkins is: in 54 fights, he's never been knocked out. He's only been knocked down twice. He's 49-5-1, and might be the best that's ever been at his age.

Now, I don't get too much into boxing; it's a fine thing in person when you can get deep into the live event, red meat vice of it all... but if you're looking for anything more than Human Cockfight, it's a hard sport to deal with. People who know what they are doing are relatively rare. Like basketball, the quality of the opponent is paramount; you can watch the best boxer in the world, but if he's paired up against someone useless, it's not going to be very good.

But still, think about the scope of the accomplishment here. At an age where most of us are just trying to avoid stepping up in pants size, Hopkins is beating the crap out of guys that are 16 years younger than him. In over fifteen professional hours in a ring against people trying to take his head off, he's never been stopped.

As the man himself said, after the fight but before the scores were read, "I'm tired of proving myself." Somehow, I'm thinking that won't be an issue for a while.

The Goalposts Moved Faster

Vai Sikahema is an ex-NFL punt returner for the Cardinals and Eagles who parlayed that into a local sportscasting gig in Philly. My best memory of him is below, a rather memorable touchdown celebration against the Giants.



For some reason, he wound up in a celebrity boxing match with the train wreck that is Jose Canseco.



You can now compare and contrast for yourself, which put up the bigger fight...

Today In Very Obvious News: Richie Sexson is a Tool

Tonight in Seattle, Richie Sexson charged the mound to attack Rangers pitcher Kason Gabbard on a ball that was over the middle of the plate and two feet away from being a called strike. He was anticipating contact following a couple of plunked hitters, including some obvious headhunting by King Felix Hernandez on Rangers second baseman Ian Kinsler.

Normally, I could care about baseball brawls; they are just sound and fury and more posturing than a WWE event. But Sexson's performance tonight really took it to another level. He'd have been only slightly more obvious about it if he had gone before the pitch, or called for time from the ump before he went.

Oh, and it was also a nice touch to bring his helmet -- i.e., a weapon -- with him to the mound, because Sexson is such an itty bitty guy at 6-foot-8, 240 pounds. It's just one more way in which Sexson does not, in any way, resemble a baseball player.

Of course, maybe the thought was that if it worked for the Cubs last year, maybe it's worth trying here. Unfortunately for the Ms, they have people like Sexson in the lineup, along with the phenomenally useless Jose Vidro, the previously scorned Raul Ibanez, and less, much less...

Update -- here's the video. High comedy from the Rangers analysts, too.

Can this really happen?

If you had told me the Sixers were going to steal Game 1 in Detroit, I could have given you a half-dozen ways how it would have happened.

None of them would have involved huge performances from Reggie Evans and Willie Green.

A big night from the Andres? Sure. Iggy had 16 points, 9 boards and 8 assists. Miller went for 20, 3 and 6. That gave them 9 more points, 5 more boards and 6 more assists than Hamilton and Billups. (To be fair, in 17 more minutes.)

Sam Dalembert coming up huge? Well, only sporadically. Dalembert had 10 boards and 4 blocks, but he was also 2 of 10 from the floor, and limited to 33 minutes from foul trouble.

Louie Williams doing a light 'em up job? Not so much. 9 points on 4 of 12 in 22 minutes. No, he's not shy.

Maybe a huge playoff debut for hot stuff rookie Thaddeus Young? Nope, though 10 in 22 minutes for a guy with zero playoff experience isn't bad.

Uncharacteristic proficiency from behind the arc or the free throw line? Nope. They were 1 of 5 from the former, and 19 of 27 (70.4%) from the later.

OK, well... maybe Detroit just couldn't keep their hands on the ball, and the Sixers were able to get out and run. Nope, turnovers were even at 12.

So, um... how the hell did they do it, and can they do it 3 more times in the next 6 games?

Any reasonable judge of the NBA says no; there is a reason why Detroit is a dark horse champion pick, and they've got an ungodly amount of playoff experience without being too dreadfully old. We are talking about a 2 seed playing a below .500 team here, after all.

And yet... the Sixers have been above a .500 team for a while now, at least if you just consider the last 3 months of the season. Experience is great, but wins are better. No one believes in the Sixers -- seriously, I haven't received a single email or mention about the team being in the playoffs from my local friends, let alone any interest in going to see a playoff game. You can go buy tickets to Game 3 or 4 right now... and we're not talking bad seats, either. (Heck, I just might.)

Detroit never loses a Game 1. They're great at establishing order and tempo early. And yet, here are the 7 seed Sixers, coming from 15 down in the third quarter, getting huge buckets from the extremely offensively-challenged Reggie Evans...

Well, I still don't really believe. But if they can somehow steal Game 2 as well? Well... I'm sure those tickets won't still be available.

Come for the baseball, stay for the beatdown

This is from Red Sox Monster courtesy of Deadspin, and it's from that Red Sox-Dodger game tht atracted 100K people for an exhibition game. Here we go...



A couple of points here.

1) Since when in this country did we brawl over spring training games between teams with no rivalry?

2) Independent of the merits and moments in this fracas, is Red Sox Fan actually now better understood as a soccer hooligan?

3) What, exactly, compels people to applaud acts of amateur violence? Seriously, every time there's a fight in public, people boo when the security guys come to break it up, and applaud the combatants as they are being led away. If you're going that far, why not also tip, so they'll have enough money for bail in the drunk tank?

Epic Drop: Top 10 Bad Sports Date Ideas for Valentine's Day

Your link is here, and it's something I'm actually pretty proud of. Go and spread the love. Just use protection.

You do not have an answer for the triple decker pecker wrecker

UFC 75 - Unacceptable

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No one does.

$435 Million A Week... of Utter, Utter Bull

According to a new report from Challenger, Gray & Christmas Inc. and the Fantasy Sports Trade Association, over 13.6 million people play fantasy football.

We are all also supposedly costing our employers $435 million dollars a week, since we spend 45 minutes a day (and ten minutes of that coming ON THE CLOCK!) on our teams.

Two points:

1) Don't you love how these reports always assume that any time you spend in your cube is productive? Can someone please find a similar number for the jerkweeds who need to start or come into meetings late, stand around the water cooler talking about American Idol, or try to get you to buy something for their kids' school or youth group?

2) Of that 45 minutes a week, how much of it is spent, in your own personal experience, dealing with the problem owner who wants to make you bend over and take their trade, or gets wildly bent out of shape over trash talk?

I submit to you, Nation, that fantasy football costs most employers NOTHING -- that the same opportunities and revenue that happen in the full eight hours of work are there for everyone in the seven hours and fifty minutes of work.

And that reports that tell you otherwise... are just The Man trying to get you to stop reading sports blogs.

Fight The Power!