Epic Drop: Top 10 Signs That The Dolphins Didn't Want Jay Feely

Well, the downside of being fungible is when you're the fungi, and that's never been more true than for the well-traveled Feely. I'd say more, but, well, he's a kicker. Click already.

Football Politics

One of the nicer points in the great Michael Lewis book "The Blind Side" is that football fandom falls on a continuum. If you are more into offense and innovation, you fall towards the Bill Walsh side of life, which Lewis refers to as a kind of football leftism. If you like the smashmouth defense approach that's more in line with a Bill Parcells team, you are a right-winger. (Realizing, of course, that Walsh's teams were more physical than you remember, and that Parcells' best teams were smarter and more innovative than given credit for.)

Now, I'd like to take this farther.

If you're a football leftist, you are, I submit, in the majority of the audience, and definitely in the world of fantasy sports. (Perhaps this is even part of the reason why many fans have such an antipathy towards it.)

You can, of course, just say that network execs are more leftist, which, of course, falls into a standing litany of Red State America. However, the ratings also back it up. Ravens-Giants, also known as the worst Super Bowl in the history of the universe, tanked in the ratings. Pats-Giants, not such a problem. The XFL, a league of low scoring and hard hitting, tanked in a year, despite being closer to actual NFL product. Arena Ball, with pinball scoring and a near-total lack of meaningful hitting, will soon be in its second decade of existence.

Most people, of course, don't fall into one clear distinction, and will mostly follow their own team more than a kind of team. But I'd also submit that the kind of team that you have when you are growing up helps to inform your place in the continuum. For me, the Eagles were a right-wing club, with a defense that really seemed to prefer smashing mouths than preventing points. This might also help to explain why the fan base has been so snarly towards the Andy Reid Experience, because his defenses have never been like that.

I have no greater point to make here, other than to wonder if it makes you a better or worse fan to change your orientation depending on your team's talent. Steeler Fan last year had to feel some sort of cognitive dissonance for having a team that did best with Ben Rothlisberger throwing for his life. Niner Fan has been made even more miserable by their recent failures to score, in addition to, well, sucking. When your team stops playing in the way that it's always played, it feels like a betrayal.

Let Us Now Show How Clever We Are

The Lemur wasted my time and yours tonight with trade rumors for Jason Taylor, and guess what they called the possible destination teams? Yes... wait for it... sit down because here comes the funny...

DANCE PARTNERS!

Get it? Because Taylor spent his off-season dancing on a reality show! And that means that for the rest of his life, no matter what he might do on a football field or off, including but not limited to an OJ Simpson-style freakout... he's going to be known for his wacky dancing!

Just like Emmit Smith, right? Oh, wait, Smith was on that show. Funny, I forgot.

Next, the Lemur then ran through the list of guys who rushed the quarterback who got run off once Parcells came to town. Without, of course, the context that NFL players are incredibly fungible, and that any list of pass rushers is going to include a lot of guys who are not there any more.

Now, will Taylor leave Miami? I don't know, and the Lemur doesn't, and if it actually has an impact on a team making the playoffs this year, I'll be legitimately surprised. But on the plus side, hey, dance jokes. I feel smarter now.

Epic Drop: Top 10 Views You Won't Hear Expressed About The Dolphins and JasonTaylor

Your link is here, and while I don't really concern myself very much with Dolphin Football -- in that this blog mostly deals with teams that are actually in the NFL -- dumb team moves against players just always bother me. It doesn't matter how much Taylor's paid; this is a case of an employer being a douchebag, and not cutting any slack to an employee that has performed above and beyond the call.

(Full disclosure: I've never watched the show Taylor was on. Or "American Idol", or "Survivor", or any of the other reality television shows that are lowering the standards of what it means to be entertained. But that's a whole 'nother barrel of hate.)

Besides, Bill Parcells is the biggest media whore in the NFL. (And yes, it is a heavily contested title.)

Epic Drop: Top 11 Reasons Bill Parcells Took The Miami Job

Your list is here, and all snark aside, I'm happy for the Dolphins to have achieved their dream signing of a broken-down big name who could no longer win in the NFC East. I'm sure this will all work out fine.

And in other news, WILLIE PARKER IS DEAD TO ME. DEAD, DEAD, DEAD.