Epic Drop: Top 12 Reasons Why The Bears Went WIth Orton Over Grossman

Your list is here, and as a blogger and a football fan, I'm kind of pissed off about it. We don't need another low margin, low talent, low excitement game manager. If you're going to lose -- and dear God, Bears Fan, you are going to lose, in double figures and more -- why not go down with someone who is clearly the cause of all of your woes, rather than a guy who is just going to be a passenger on that bus?

It's kind of like how the NFL has evolved away from wacky coaches like Jerry Glanville and Sam Wyche. Dammit, I demand my losing teams to be more entertaining than this!

And finally, this. By dooming Rex to the ashcan of history, we dishonor the memory of ex-Dolphins quarterback David Woodley, who (and this is true, at least according to Wikipedia) died from complications of liver and kidney failure following a history of alcohol abuse. Dammit, Lovie Smith, why are you denying Woodley his due as the worst quarterback in the history of the Super Bowl? He needed that!

The Sky is Falling in Chicago

Man, do I love Cubs fans. All morning on Chicago sports talk radio it's caller after caller crying about the Cubs. General consensus is that they're doomed. Put aside the fact that they're still in first place and are in the worst division in baseball. The only happy person in Chicago today is Rex Grossman. He's thankful that they're complaining about anybody but him.

Let me help out the Cubs fans. Here are the top five reasons why you're correct and the Cubs will fail to win the division:

#5: It's the Cubs.

#4: It's the Cubs.

#3: It's the Cubs.

#2: It's the Cubs.

#1: It's the Cubs.

I know you all thought this was the year the Cubs would win it all. Finally get to hoist that trophy, fly the World Championship flag at Wrigley and get some rings. You can always head down the road to St. Louis to check those things out. In the meantime, here's what a championship ring looks like.