Monday, February 2, 2009

Top 10 inappropriate Super Bowl questions

10. (To Tony Dungy on the NBC set At halftime) "The Cards have just suffered a hideous and devastating tragedy on the final play before halftime. How do they get over that?"

9. (To Kurt Warner) "How much does winning the Walter Payton award mean to you right now?"

8. (To Larry Fitzgerald Sr.) "Do you even know the names of your other kids anymore?"

7. (To Charlie Batch) "Was getting your second ring sweeter than your first?"

6. (To Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie) "So, all in all, how would you rate your rookie year?"

5. (To Mike Tomlin) "When Ken Whisenhunt was making all of those correct challenges and getting his team to come back from the biggest deficit in Super Bowl history, how tight was your anus?"

4. (To Justin Hartwig) "If the safety had been a critical part of a loss, how would you have had the ref killed?"

3. (To Ben Roethlisberger) "Since your wide receivers keep winning the MVP in your Super Bowl wins, aren't you more or less a glorified game manager?"

2. (To Edge James) "Was playing in the Super Bowl everything you hoped it would be?"

1. (Once more to Warner) "Why is Troy Polamalu's god better than yours?"

3 comments:

Tracer Bullet said...

By committing so many penalties, do you feel like you honored the memory of Pat Tillman in that you died largely due to friendly fire?

Kurt, win Holmes caught the game-winner did you hear a soft voice saying "It was then, my son, that I dropped you"?

Larry, you were the big-name WR coming into this game, yet you were outplayed by Holmes. Is his penis larger than yours as well?

Coach Tomlin, as the youngest head coach and only the second African-American head coach to win a Super Bowl, are you planning to have your way with every white woman in the greater Pittsburgh area?

Coach Arians, your offense, and especially your offensive line, have been the subject of heavy criticism this year. Now that you've been vindicated, will you switch to chaps so your critics can more easily kiss your ass?

Stoeten said...

Mike Timlin must have bet a lot on the game to be so concerned-- I didn't know the Red Sox still paid him that much.

DMtShooter said...

Fixed, sigh...