Epic Drop: Top 10 Implications From the NFL's Videotape Review for Gang Signals

Yes, dear God in Heaven, this is what they are concerned about. Honestly. I'm not sure I've seen a bigger waste of time and corporate fascism since David Stern became the NBA's fashion hall monitor. And is it too much for me to wonder, out loud and everything, of the relative dangers to the world at large from gang violence, as opposed to the everyday horrors suffered at the hands of the league alcohol, fast food, automotive, oil and pharmaceutical sponsors? (Oh, dear, there I go being all political again...)

Anyway, your list is here, and to all my gangbangers in the house, let me hear you say whatever it is that you say when you, you know, exist...

Suggested Gangs for some of this weekend's most Well-Known NFL Players

Look, let me put it to you this way: the NFL all too often looks like a game between the Bloods and the Crips without any weapons. There, I said it. - Rush Limbaugh, Noted Gang Expert, 1/19/07

Drew Brees, Saints QB -- Habitats for Humanity

Peyton Manning, Colts QB -- Sharks from "West Side Story"

Tedy Bruschi, Pats LB -- 2Tuff42 Consonants

Brian Urlacher, Bears LB -- FatHeadz

Tom Brady, Pats QB -- Baseball Furies

Stephen Gostkowski, Robbie Gould, John Carney, PKs -- Chess Club

Adam Vinateri -- Illuminati