Sunday, November 16, 2014

Eagles - Packers Takeaways

Welcome To Pretender Land
> K Cody Parkey nearly fell during the opening kickoff, which was foreboding

> Green Bay QB Aaron Rodgers saw no reason to focus on CB Cary Williams, since CB Bradley Fletcher was also found so very wanting

> Yellow did not bother with a running game for much of the day, because, well, um, why not

> K Mason Crosby, possibly the only Packer to not have a good day, drew in a 22-yard figgie, which is hard to do

> On Yellow's first sack. QB Mark Sanchez was taken down helmet to helmet by DT Latroy Guion, who turned RG Matt Tobin into a turnstile

> On Green's first down, Sanchez overthrew the covered RB Darren Sproles without a lot of pressure, the first of many huh decisions on the day

> There was no pass rush for Green during the part of the game that mattered

> Snap and fumble and big loss for 14 is a Yellow gift

> QB Aaron Rodgers to TE Andrew Quarless to convert 3rd and 18 redefined easy in our time

> On a 3rd and 10 to somehow get off the field, the Yellow QB hit TE Richard Rodgers for another easy one, and we were all reminded how losing LB DeMecco Ryans matters

> When the secondary blitzed, they didn't bother Rodgers at all, either

> Lacy through overmatched defense for 10 as CB Brandon Boykin is down, and this is looking like men against boys so far

> Rodgers continued the surgery with a throw to WR Davonte Adams, simple six yard slant and score, and Fletcher gets a friendly fire face mask as well as the TD against

> Polk puts it on the ground, but STer Brad Smith saved this from earlier garbage time with a recovery

> On 2nd and 7, Yellow declined a holding penalty, because they correctly just wanted to get to the third down conversion fail faster

> PR Micah Hyde with the return score made sure that all facets of the team got beat today

> STer Josh Huff with the whiff on that, and he's having a fairly tragic rookie year

> After 13 minutes, it was Yellow 17, Green 0, and over

> Under the heading of glimmers, Sanchez to Sproles for 16 on a well-done screen was pretty, and he also led McCoy perfectly for 18 at the end of the first quarter

> As soon as Fox cited the impossible to sustain small sample size red zone work by Sanchez, I knew that was going away, too

> On 3rd and 2, Sanchez got destroyed by LB Clay Mathews, who didn't bite on the run fake at all

> I suppose it was good that Sanchez was able to finish this game

> Parkey from 33 connects, so he didn't, for the most part, join in the suckage

> Parkey with another stumbling kickoff and tolerable outcome

> Yellow ran play action, as if Rodgers needed more time, for another 22 to Cobb

> There was a batted ball is the first half, so I can confirm that the Eagle defensive line did exist in this game

> Packer WR Randall Cobb out-toughed Williams for 11, which is a little disturbing when you remember that Cobb is a smurf

> Rodgers to Nelson for a 27 yard TD could not have been any easier for Yellow

> Nelson is just way better than Fletcher, or anyone else who plays CB for Green

> 24-3 Yellow, with Rodgers at 232 yards in less than 20 minutes of game play

> Just FYI, the single-game record for yards passing in a game is Norm Van Brocklin at 554, so yeah, the pace was not good

> Fox confirmed that Green Bay is better than any other place to watch football, eat meat, or be white

> I've seen every play from scrimmage this year, of course, and that slow left sweep has never worked

> 3rd and 6 and time for a sack is Sanchez missing Matthews, open and deep, and that's on the WR, too

> Lacy for 6 on a screen, and yeah, that was into a blitz, so even the play-calling stank

> Rodgers was actually sacked and fumbled on a play by DE Vinny Curry, but the room service hop let Yellow gain back much of the yards

> On 3rd and 7 from the gun, Rodgers hit Cobb for 13, as the WR left Fletcher's underwear on the ground

> Rodgers took a timeout, mostly because he looked incapable of stifling laughter, then ran for 16 for something new to do

> Rodgers used a lot of clock between plays, so as to not make the blowout too extreme

> Lacy scored through Fletcher to make it 30-3, and my laundry fought more after the whistle than before

> Sanchez had many issues with snaps in this one, which is not exactly new with him

> Even on a 3rd and 12 to convert with TE Zach Ertz, Sanchez left yards on the table with a relatively poor throw

> Foles to Matthews for 40 was nice work by both ends, and could have had 15 more on a late QB hit

> Sanchez pumps and misses Matthews, 18 seconds left in the half

> Slow tempo, Sanchez shakes off a sack, then overthrows Cooper, not very open in the end zone

> 3rd and 10 from the 10 with timeouts left is slow tempo and a near grounding

> So much for the Sanchez is Red Zone Magic meme, and RT Jason Peters got owned

> Parkey connected from 33 to make it 30-6 at the half

> A third down conversion to Maclin got the WR 26 fighting yards, so he didn't give up in this one

> The fumble to end that drive took out any cheap source of dignity or comeback

> That's equal parts a high handoff from Sanchez, and the RB paying too much attention to reading the coverage, so Sanchez got the turnover more on reputation than reality

> Rodgers with the deep ball to Nelson, but Fletcher separates it, and that's a nice play by the CB, which we should recognize, given its relative rarity

> A long clock after the bomb failed should have been a delay flag, and was finally grounding against Yellow, with CB Brandon Boykin ending the play by engaging in patty cake with Rodgers

> On 3rd and 22, the Green defense did get off the field, proving it was in fact possible to do

> Sanchez from the gun double pumped on the screen, but LB Clay Matthews ended it anyway, and that was one of many moments of bad comedy for the QB

> Sanchez throws it away on big coverage, and Yellow is now rushing few and making him by exact, which you will see a lot of in the future

> Sanchez missed an open Ertz, bad overthrow from a secure pocket, and yeah, he's still Mark Sanchez

> Jones with a weak kick, and we've got 28 minutes of garbage time ahead

> Rodgers from the gun shakes off pressure, then gets 16, and he's just unfair

> Rodgers with his first bad throw of the day, but it's safe and out of bounds

> Williams stopped RB James Starks on a screen, and yay, moments of defensive competence

> I did see Connor Barwin on the field today, just in case you didn't

> Sanchez to Celek for 10, good pocket, then McCoy for 5, not quite quick enough to get past S Ha Ha Clinton-Dix, who is down after the play ends

> The rookie S left under his own power, and for once, Eagle Fan can't really be all that grumbly about takes to stop tempo

> Huff drops a catchable ball, and yeah, he's keeping Brad Smith and Jeff Mahel employed

> LB Julius Peppers with the TAInt and Lambeau Leap, and yeah, he's still Mark Sanchez

> On the TAInt, Sanchez was flagged for a 15 yard clip, which I've never seen in 40 years of watching football

> If you wondered about seeing if QB Matt Barkley could be any worse, or why the last 21 minutes of this required the use of QB1 and RB1, you were not alone

> Maclin for 7 as Yellow looks fighty for turnovers

> McCoy for 13 on small pride by the OL, then Sanchez to Cooper for 14 off play action

> Sanchez misses Cooper, open in the end zone, and nope, neither of these guys are good enough, scheme be damned

> Sanchez to Ertz for 6, then misses Sproles, crazy open on the wheel route, could have been a score against the LB

> 4th and 4 as Yellow's crowd gets loud, and Sanchez hits Ertz for 22; small amount of hope that the TE is coming alive again

> McCoy for 4, then Maclin for 4 on slippery screen

> 3rd and 2 from the 10 is a screen to Matthews, and the rookie WR shows excellent strength with the straight arm for a score

> Not S Morgan Burnett's finest hour, but Matthews does have beast-like tendencies

> Kelly did not go for the onside kick while down 26 with 17 minutes left, because, well, he knew there was no point

> Max clock and Lacy for 6 and 5 and 37 and yeah, so much for the defense being able to stop the run, even when it's an obvious play call

> Rodgers throws one away on good coverage, then converts on 3rd and 10 for the 45th time today, this one to Lacy, who beasts his way through the Eagle defense for a 32-yard score

> After the touchdown, Yellow threw a bucket of confetti on Green while whistling "Sweet Georgia Brown"

> 46-13 Yellow after 45:20 of play, so, um, yeah, this isn't good

> McCoy for 6, Sanchez misses the covered Sproles on a what are you doing throw, then throws a terrible back foot pick against pressure

> You can safely end those Sanchez Renaissance memes now

> Crosby missed from 50, and honestly, the score could have been a lot worse today

> Kelly did what he could for the fantasy players of America

> Sanchez with the comedy snap fumble for the leisurely Yellow defensive score, and that one's going on the Benny Hill highlight reel, too

> C Jason Kelce has had problems with snaps since coming back from injury, and it's nice that Green is making sure this one is as bad as humanly possible

> Matthews went for 36 on a 3rd and 12 for the least relevant 100 yard yardage game ever

> Maclin ended the drive with a 20-yard score, so not as if Green quit out there

> Packer Fan lives to yell Kuhn, for some reason

> Flynn to Cobb for 12, and it looks like the WR snuck on to pad his numbers

> Cheap shot by LT JC Tredder on LB Trent Cole with 4 minutes left is a little telling

> Jenkins with a punt block as the Green ST pads their numbers, 5th of the year

> RB Chris Polk gets 3 as McCoy's fantasy owners curse a blue streak, then loses 2 on the stretch play that hasn't worked all year

> Sanchez to WR Brad Smith, drops a good ball at the 2, and yeah, he's not exactly pushing Huff for playing time

> Fourth and goal is Polk on the right side stretch for fail, just to make Yellow's defensive day complete

> Kneeling ends it, and my laundry is 7-3, but with nearly no chance of a first round bye, since they keep losing head to head against teams they might be competing with for slots

> That's the most points allowed in 42 years for my laundry, and a thorough beat down in every aspect of the game, on national TV

> Next week is a bounceback game against the putrid Titans, but honestly, it's kind of hard to care when the ceiling of your laundry has been shown so clearly

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