NFL Week Five: Top 10 Ad Questions

10) What's less appetizing -- Brian Wilson or Taco Bell?

9) Isn't Aaron Rodgers disturbed by how much he's lowering the collective IQ of America with his twerpish touchdown move?

8) If I drink Coors Light, will I hallucinate miniature Mike Ditkas, or can I just vomit instead?

7) Will Dish Network and Blockbuster make me wear a moronically oversized hat as the price for subscribing to their service?

6) Are Southwest's customers all prone to running like goobers at the airport when no one is impeding them?

5) Why are State Farm's wish-enabled douchebag customers so angry?

4) Is the reason why Southwest's flights are so late is because they are so busy looking at every other franchise?

3) Does learning a second language make me more likely to take a same-sex lover into my new VW?

2) Is anyone else disturbed by the over the top loving penile profile and slow motion elongation in the Budweiser Select ad?

1) If I take out a Farmer's Insurance policy, will someone take a bucket of hell for it?