The Five Answer

After an opening week in which he finished with just 39 passing yards in a road loss to the Chargers, there are all kinds of Donovan McNabb Is Finished stories on the Web... and all I can think of is how the best QB in the history of my franchise is going down, at age 35, with a quickness, and how unseemly the glee of many people in my fandom is.

There is no doubt that he's not the player he used to be, or that the team didn't do well in getting him out of town when they did. The fact that second year safety Nate Allen, the player they got with the second round pick, is looking less helpful by the day will make the trade less of a theft, but moving him was clearly the right move. Some of his comments since leaving town have also seemed somewhat churlish or curious, and there's that whole matter of the 1-4 record in NFC championship games to discuss.

But, um... why does Kevin Kolb get a pass and our general good wishes, while McNabb's struggles and decline are met with barely contained glee?

The answer, as always with McNabb, is complicated. He never *really* fit into the zeitgeist of this town, seeing how he was articulate and didn't seem to be having a life and death life experience out there. For a man who beat teams with his legs early in his career, he seemed gun-shy about running later, and maybe even a little heavy. Low interception rates also spoke to ineffectiveness in the red zone, and for every great memory in the division (the Tecmo Bowl scramble and throw to DeSean Jackson against Dallas, the phone call punking of the Giants, any number of games against the Redkins), there was misery outside of it. Some blamed him for "losing" Terrell Owens; others conflated him with Andy Reid to question the team's decisions in the red zone and game management. By the time he was sent out, there was surprisingly little loyalty left for him, either in the front office or in the fan base.



The biggest problem with McNabb, really, is that he disappointed, mostly because his Eagles could never do anything but disappointment, given their level and opportunity.



But it's not as if anyone in town hates the Vikings, has any connection with Christian Ponder or anyone else in Minny, or should give him grief for the way everything worked out. He got old, they shipped him out, he's not good anymore and will probably be out of football in another couple of years. In other words, he's done everything you could ask of him to do, and you'll probably cheer him in a few years when they bring him in for that one-day contract and number retirement. (How much do you get paid for those one-day deals, I wonder?)

So why not just let him be now.. and why did the same fan base keep rooting for, say, Charles Barkley and Allen Iverson until the ends of their careers in opposing laundry? (Because we're haters, and hateful, and don't do well with smooth guys. But still, y'all should be ashamed of yourselves.)

Top 10 takeaways from the Phillies clinching a playoff berth

10) It's not technically true that this happened on the day they signed Cliff Lee

9) It's fitting that it happened in Houston, since Ed Wade has been such a consistent help to the team over the years

8) When you've made the postseason in five straight years, you really don't get too excited about these things

7) Some of the younger players might have actually noticed

6) Since Old Time Phillies Fan remembers 1964, this matters a lot to a portion of the fan base

5) If they do this for another consecutive decade, they will finally be even with the Braves

4) With 16 games left in the regular season, the team can now finally relax and have some fun out there

3) Maybe now, the team will finally draw some fans, and get some of their fans to travel to see them

2) Real Phillies Fans, of course, are convinced this is just the precursor to immense disappointment

1) Not only is this the best era in the history of the franchise to be a fan of the laundry, it's also the second through fifth best eras in the history of the franchise

Top 10 reasons why the NBA season won't start on time

10) What with the MLB/NHL/NFL/CFB overlap, very few people are actually going to notice

9) The Association would rather protect the Maloof Goofs than the fans

8) David Stern is just that committed to increasing the public awareness of Turkish basketball, Rucker Park games, and the WNBA

7) Now that Yao Ming and his continent of fans and potential financial backers are no longer with us, no one really sees the point of continuing

6) The Association is banking on the idea that if the lockout just goes on long enough, people will transfer all of their LeBron James Hate over to the suits

5) If Shaquille O"Neal, with his legendary commitment to fitness and being ready for the opening bell, is no longer around, there's just no point to playing games before Christmas

4) Will need extra time to process this whole Ron Artest name change weirdness

3) It will give everyone a fresh chance to enjoy the college game, where there's very little of that distracting athleticism, realistic 3-point line, or one-on-one defensive ability to get in the way of the game

2) Unlike the NFL, the NBA is committed to the idea that their sport should shoot itself in both ears, then through the mouth

1) It's not as if there was any good momentum built up from the playoffs, or that people really want to see James and the Heat, the Mavs try to repeat, the continued emergence of Kevin Durant and the Thunder, the Amare/Carmelo Knicks, the traditional Laker-Celtic powerhouses or anything else that drove the Association's best playoff ratings in decades

Top 12 reasons why Jerry Jones called Tony Romo's Week 1 Flameout "Outstanding"

12) Needs to say wild and crazy things to distract people from the fact that he's had one -- one! -- playoff win in the last 15 years

11) Wanted to give me a slam dunk list topic on an off-day (thanks again, Jerry!)

10) As much of the Jones Era has shown, the owner really doesn't care about winning, so much as he does about hype

9) Hasn't realized yet that the Rex Ryan Jets don't have a pass rush right now, or any past history of being good in September

8) Jerruh will pretty much say or do anything to keep his overrated team of playoff pretenders on ESPN's front page

7) If your only other option is Jon Kitna, you'd say anything to make the starter feel better, too

6) Like the rest of us, Jerry cares more about winning fantasy football than real football

5) Having the franchise's first loss after being up 14 in the fourth quarter means that Romo's making history, and that's always good

4) Believes that throwing a godawful pick to Darrelle Revis is excusable because, hey, that's Darrelle Revis, and he has mystic powers to make you stupid

3) Hasn't noticed that the Cowboys are 1-6 in Romo's last 7 starts, since that would involve remembering anything about last year

2) Doesn't think that anyone else in the NFL will be as innovative on defense as Ryan by sending extra rushers on passing downs

1) Has flat out lost his mind with the stress of his debt payments in a down economy for his Xanadu-like pleasure palace and memorial to himself

Top 21 Week 1 NFL Takeaways

21) Sebastian Janikowski connected from an NFL-record tying 63 yards, causing thousands of fantasy football fans to pule that they didn't get any bonus for a field goal of more than 50

20) There's really no reason to think that Green Bay won't win the Super Bowl again

19) If Donovan McNabb had retired instead of leaving Philadelphia, his Hall of Fame candidacy would seem a whole lot better right now

18) Someone forgot to tell the Dolphins that the weather in South Florida is supposed to be to their advantage

17) If you'd like to go to an Indianapolis game this year and/or buy a Kerry Collins jersey, Colts Fan is pricing to sell

16) By losing by 34 at home to the Bills, Todd Haley and the Chiefs had their 2010 AFC West division crown retroactively removed

15) It turns out that the Steelers and Ravens don't have to play tight games after all

14) The Niners-Seahawks game was decided by Ted Ginn Jr., just in case you were tempted to draw some sort of significance from it

13) Cam Newton already has more career yards than JaMarcus Russell and Jimmy Claussen

12) Kevin Kolb had over 300 yards and 2 touchdowns with no picks for the Cards, and actually didn't throw everything to Larry Fitzgerald

11) The traditional second half of the season collapse from the Giants came a little early this year

10) The Browns proved that when you are playing a team with a bad rookie QB, it's really best to make sure he ends the game healthy

9) Matt Ryan threw for the emptiest 300 yards, and Michael Turner ran for the most meaningless 100 yards, you ever did see in their loss to the Bears

8) Now that there's automatic instant replay on every touchdown, Andy Reid's capacity for worthless challenges has dropped dramatically

7) Miami's goal line offense of 100% Fade Routes isn't exactly intimidating

6) Tom Brady threw for over 500 yards, and Chad Ochocinco still sucked

5) In the battle of national tragedies, 9/11 Pentagon beat 9/11 WTC, but 9/11 WTC beat '63 Grassy Knoll

4) Five games had both QBs throw for over 300 yards, so if you don't like pinball, you really need to go find another game to watch

3) If you want to make the Arian Foster owner in your fantasy league hurl, just start listing the similarities that their high pick has to Steve Slaton

2) While you might think that the Broncos and Raiders just don't like each other from the rampant penalties and cheap shots, it's more along the lines of shameless flirting

1) Dallas Fan might say that they haven't lost faith in Tony Romo, but we all know they are lying