Free Ricky!

Today, erstwhile Dolphins running back and full-time enjoyer of the high life Ricky Williams petitioned for reinstatement to the NFL. Frankly, I'm a fan -- the fact that a pothead can be a tough hard inside runner is, really, a wonderful chance for the kids to learn some subtlety in their assessments of drug users -- and if nothing else, this would be Entertaining, and the Dolphins are anything but that right now.

Besides, let's face it -- the Dolphins need players all over the place, and the possibility of Reggie Brown getting cuckolded by an infamous idiot is pretty great. (Can you tell I don't own Brown in any league? Yeah, I bet you could.)

So, come on NFL. Much of this year has been unwatchable; the games have been bad, teams in the major media markets are pretty terrible, and a Cowboys-Patriots Super Bowl will cause America to collapse in a vortex of smugness that hasn't been seen since the Mets-Yankee World Series. I dream of Ricky being the Week 15 blemish on the Pats Quest For Perfection. Bring back Ricky, and lively up yourselves!