The Fix That Wasn't

This weekend in the NBA, two Conference Finals had the opportunity to go to a seventh game. For NBA detractors -- and yes, you are legion -- this was an easy time to bitch about the officiating, to call for a Kobe-LeBron fix, and to cite the presence of Nike puppets as something sinister.

And yet, for both conferences, the simple conspiracy was that the better team won in the minimum number of games necessary, without any officiating moment of consequence. The result is an NBA Finals that will feature Los Angeles and, gasp, Orlando, but not until Thursday night, or in just enough time for the national media to exhaust every man, woman and child on the planet with LeBron James 2010 Free Agency Speculation. (I don't think he goes anywhere, but then again, I thought he was going to force Game 7 tonight. So what do I know?)

A few notes on the vanquished. For all of the early talk in the series as to how Carmelo Anthony was making The Leap and Chauncey Billups was the best thing that had happened to Denver since the discovery that snow could create tourism... well, Occam's Razor is a fine way to keep your head in such matters, and it may be just that once Lamar Odom's back had recovered from the hard foul that he took in the Rockets series, this series was over. Kenyon Martin may look scary with all that ink, Nene is a nice player with active hands, and Birdman Anderson can block you all day from the weak side, but Odom is just a poor man's LeBron with the big man passing, and when he plays well, the Lakers don't lose, mostly because he makes Pau Gasol the most effective offensive center in basketball. The Nugget bigs are good defensively, but they aren't 2008 Kevin Garnett.

For Cleveland... I just had the sense, in watching the game tonight, that they knew they were beaten every step of the way. LeBron James might be the only player in NBA history who can get a near triple double without seeming like he's having anything close to his usual game, and when he takes "only" 8 free free throws in his first 39 minutes, that's just not the same guy that was in that laundry in the first five games. James had just four points in the fourth quarter tonight, 1 before the final minute of garbage time; his tank was long past "E".

Mo Williams is going to wear the goat horns for not showing up early in the series and then making the non-valid guarantee, but if Cleveland desperately needs to upgrade their bigs. Zydrunas Ilgauskas gave them 2 points, 7 boards, 2 steals and 4 fouls in 22 minutes, and if the Cavs allow him to get a year older and a year less mobile while playing meaningful minutes for them, they are absolutely insane. The same goes for Ben Wallace, of course; had the Cavs simply had a Kendrick Perkins / Joel Pryzbilla type to mix in as a true defensive stopper, they might have won this series. Hell, a Brad Miller might have done it for them, and I could easily throw out another dozen low-tier names. A team should not lose in the Conference Finals with home-court advantage because their best defensive play from a center is a Sideshow Vareajo flop.

It was also striking that, when the Cavs season was on the line tonight,for the first time in the series, the best player on the floor wasn't wearing a Cavs jsersey. Instead, it was Dwight Howard, just running wild without early foul trouble, taking advantage of the pick your poison single defender option that Mike Brown threw at him. Every team in the East has been wondering how on earth they could comppete with an unstoppable force, but given his age and power, it's possible that the force is in Florida. The signature play of this game was a lightning-quick spin and spike that made Sideshow Vareajo look like he was bolted to the floor. It's not like NBA history is absent the example of any big man just crushing everything in his path.With the Cavs shooting terribly at the line, and not getting there very often, against the Magic when they were hitting their threes... well, that's just about the living prescription of a game the Magic can't lose.

Lakers-Magic will get similar or better ratings that LA-Cleveland, though probably not up to LA-Boston last year. People forget that James was already in one Finals that no one watched, though the anti-Spurs bias probably had more to do with that. There would have been more interest in watching him this year, since he's a bigger star and on the radar for any number of NBA+ markets that look at him and dream of the future, but not so much.

And as for Cleveland Fan, who doesn't even get a signature play to pin this losing memory on -- really, the lasting memory of this series is still going to be James stealing Game Two at the buzzer... well, I just feel bad for you. Best record in the NBA in the regular season, best player in the world on the roster, two crushing sweeps in the first two rounds, and done. You aren't the only ones surprised by this, really.

Scene (and question) from a train

For those of you who know the daily joy of regional rail, a quick question.

You board a Friday afternoon rush hour train for a 40-minute trip. The AC is off, and the car is 80% filled. The train is late, and your mood is not great.

You pass by a white male in a blue striped polo shirt and aviator sunglasses who is taking up two seats up curling up in the fetal position to snooze.

On the other end of the car, a black woman is having an energetic conversation on her cell phone about the failure of the person on the other end to arrive in Newark on time with a baby for transfer. This conversation lasts several minutes,and can be heard clearly for several cars, such is her volume.

Do you:

1) Tell the white guy to move over so you can sit next to him, just for malicious spark of ruining his nappy time,

2) Inform the black woman that, if the baby looks and acts anything like her, she's better off flying solo, especially since that might mean she could STFU,

3) Admire the white guy's stick it to the man attitude, especially since the train conductor isn't calling him on it either, and think about pulling it off yourself on some future trip,

4) Crank up the headphones so you can ignore the black woman and not be one of the pissy passive-aggressive people who are telling her to shut up, albeit not to to her face or in a way that she even actually hears, or

5) Write about the whole mess on your wildly unpopular blog to distract yourself from the lack of AC, and to kill most of the trip time with the writing, image find, editing and posting.

I'll leave it to the reader to guess which way I went...

Obvious But Fun

Plus, it shows up KanYe as being a white boy, which I'm pretty sure we can all agree on at this point.

And where there were no sand, we ate Blogrolling. (You ate what?) We ate Blogrolling.

Why Citi Field is just so twee, so pwecious, so Mets. And yet another reason why new ballparks suck, and should be actively worked against by a more mature, post-recession, America. (This is a whole 'nother post, one that longtime FTT readers probably already know, but so be it.)

Is there anything more frightening than the phrase "ESPN Innovation Lab"? I'm seeing a "Clockwork Orange" kind of situation in which I'm forced to watch a continual loop of Home Run Derby, Who's Next and Pardon The Braying Jackassery. Quite Frankly, I think this is just a Lemur move to get the hell out of the armpit that is Bristol, Connecticut... but don't tell Red Sox Nation. They'll get bent if they lose NESN2, aka ESPN, and we know what happens when those very special people face adversity.

Your $1 magazine that features nothing but random mug shots from random arrests, which made my brain give me nothing but "Raising Arizona" references for a half hour. Turn to the right!

Nick Underhill gives the heads-up on Tigers' pitcher Rick Porcello, who might be historically good. Useful to know.

Tom Scocca points out that the NBA marketing machine is also Kobe vs. Not Kobe; I'll even forgive him the snotty Bird/Erving aside. That's what happens when you're (a) really good, and (b) really reprehensible. But remember, Philly Fan was bad, bad, bad for booing him as the All-Star Game MVP. (Once again, score one for my town's ability to spot a problem before it's obvious.)

205 drop: Top 10 least-loved MLB promotional giveaways

Your drop today has one item that's in highly questionable taste, and that's not even considering the highly unseemly thought of Manny Ramirez eating a home pregnancy test. Comedy ain't pretty, people. Go click and see where I've offended.

Cavs-Magic Game Five: Where Amazing Happens Late

Tonight in Cleveland, the Magic didn't need the game. The NBA didn't want them to win the game. The Cavs, especially on their home court, came out and established a +20-point lead fast. And then for three quarters or more, the home team was good and terrified, until a bench player saved them.

Let's just say that if you are a Cavs fan, you're not exactly filled with confidence that you are going to win this in seven.

Cleveland came out like a house on fire, building a 22 point lead in the first nine minutes with scoring from just about everyone wearing the laundry. Anthony Johnson and Michael Pietrus cut into the lead a little at the close of the quarter, which ended at Cavs 35, Magic 18. In the second, the Magic started chipping, as everyone in Cleveland knew they would, completing an 11-1 and then starting another, which is where my family obligations ended.

The lead got down to eight on a Rashard Lewis free throw make off transition. Delonte West made an old-school three on very nice use of continuation, but Hedo Turkoglu answered with a make. Martin Gortat got a flat-footed O-board, leading to a Turk turnover in traffic. Rather than get back, the Turk and van Gundy went nuts over a non-call, leading to a van Gundy technical. Mo Williams made it to push it back to 10.

I'm been trying to avoid talking about the zebras, because it's such a chalk argument to make. It's like going to a baseball or football game and bitching about the weather; it won't make you happy, and it will distract you from the game. And as bad as the officiating has been, I'm not sure what kind of golden standard we are comparing it to. I don't remember NBA officiating ever being good; it is what it is. I'm also not sure how it ever gets better. So, moving on.

After the Cleveland celeb crawl, Craig Sager talks to CC Sabathia, who gets to talk as a Cleveland fan despite, well, being a Yankee now. How the hell is that OK for Cleveland Fan?

Back to the micro blog, where the Turk hits a three to cut the lead to six, and the pick and roll has just murdered the Cavs; the run was 27-11 before Mo Williams connected on his fourth three of the night. James penetrated like a knife through butter, finding Joe Smith for an uncontested layup, and this is the Cavs team I picked to win the series. The lead went back to 11 with four minutes left in the half.

In the timeout, we hear Mike Brown telling his bigs that fouling Dwight Howard is better than giving him dunks. And to think, some people wonder about Mike. Not surprisingly, Rafer Alston left his jumper in Orlando, along with Dwight Howard's free throw stroke. The Cavs offense went stagnant in James' hands, and the Magic started to feed Howard with success, but Z rolled to the hoop for a slam, only a small respite before Howard owns him at the other end. Z can't even foul Howard right. Yeesh.

The Magic then makes another run as James can't avoid turnovers, the Cavs can't get back on defense, and Howard is just alone in the world as a big man with hops in this series. Howard with 14 and 4 at this point, 11 in the second quarter, and the Magic are doing everything but shoot threes. The Cavs just can't defend this team at all; the Magic are shooting 44% from the field, with tons of open misses, and yet they are in the game. Two LeBron free throws stops the bleeding until Lewis makes another easy runner. James can't make, and Lewis drains the three to close it to one at the half. Right now, it seems like the Cavs don't even think they can win this series. Cavs 56, Magic 55.

The third quarter began with a miss trade, and then the Magic took the lead with Howard owning Z. Lewis then stole from Z, and the Turk nailed a three, and it's a four point game and a dead, dead, dead building. Z should just fake a blown hammy at this point; he's putting up Maginot Line level resistance to Howard. A quick Brown timeout gets them a West turn and a Lee make, and that's a 7-0 run. After matching turnovers, the Turk hits a runner, and the Magic are up 8. West gets a make out of a stagnant set, but the Cavs are dead team playing right now, and Reggie Miller was openly begging for James to do everything.

Williams makes his fifth three pointer, and he has 20, to cut it to three. The Turk drove around Sideshow with ease, but can't finish. James gets a steal and Alston picked up a very iffy clear path foul call; James makes both and it's back to one. West missed the corner three, Lee did that, and that's the series in microcosm; instead of a Cavs lead, it's the Magic by four. Z gets an old school three with Alston doing the honors; kind of lucky there, but they'll take it. Z is 5 for 5 from the floor, and yet a crippling problem. Alston misses, James doesn't, and the Cavs take the lead back halfway through the quarter. That was fast, and yet Cleveland Fan was still on the fence about it.

The Turk misses a quick three, and Lewis drew his third. Z makes again, and the Cavs lead is three. Howard walks trying to punish Z, on his awful cross-court hook thing that makes me wonder if he's ever going to be a good post player. Lewis missed at the rim, and James take it a million miles an hour at the Turk, who puts him on the line in self-preservation. James missed both to stop the momentum, and the Turk scored, now has 18, to really kill it.

Reasonable ball movement ends with West not wanting the shot, but then taking and missing it. The Magic remember that they have Howard, and used him; fouls on consecutive plays puts him on the line, and he gets a ridiculous hop and roll to give his team the lead back. Z finally missed, a foul line shot that was easier than many of his previous makes. After a Williams miss and a Sideshow board, Z makes a good move to the hoop and draws Howard's third foul; one make ties it again.

Lewis with all day for the three, but couldn't get it. Z missed from the elbow, too much going through him now. Sideshow flops to no effect, and Howard slams for the fresh lead. Williams has to go to the dressing room with a cut. James found Sideshow for a runner and Howard's fourth foul, and maybe the Cavs can finally take advantage of his absence, given that the Magic haven't been hitting their threes (yet). The Sideshow miss kept it tied.

The Turk drew Vareajo's fourth, and that's a problem for the Cavs. Two makes send the lead back their way. Wally Sczerbiak missed, then fouled, putting Lewis on the line; the Zerb is not a part of a balanced champion's breakfast right now. Two makes and it was four. West with a nice make on a hesitation jumper. The Turk can do anything he wants to West on the other end, and he makes the jumper. James finds Gibson for the corner three, and Gibson's been huge for the Cavs tonight. Gortat can't finish, and James feeds the Zerb for a miss to end the quarter. It's Magic 79, Cavs 78, with twelve minutes left to close the series.

Williams starts the fourth with a three for the lead on James' ninth assist. Gibson dominates Johnson on defense, and van Gundy would have his first tech if he didn't already have one. James missed over the Turk, and he's just 5 of 14 tonight; the MVP then picked up his third on Pietrus. If James is going to win this game, he'll have to do it with penetration. Pietrus got one of two, keeping the Cavs in front. Williams moving nicely tonight, fed James who got blocked by Gortat, but Wallace got the o-board and the Turk's fourth. James gets his triple double in assists with Gibson's second triple, and West then turns the Magic; transition ends with James collecting the Gortat foul and two makes. The Cavs are suddenly up six, and van Gundy has seen enough for a timeout; Cavs Fan was getting loud.

I love the Association, but after 40 days of this, I've really heard quite enough of how Dylan McDermott IS DUMPING THE BODY! I mean, do I share my personal problems with him?

Better Cavs defense is spiked by Howard scoring over Wallace. Gibson missed a three, Wallace board, West missed... and Pietrus connects. Series in microcosm again, and it's 86-85 Cavs, with Brown going for the instacall timeout. James goes by Pietrus for the half-court layup that's his stock in trade as a ridiculously good player. Johnson's three stayed out. James drove on Lewis for no call. In transition, Z gives Howard his fourth, rather than a monster dunk, but Howard hits both. The Cavs got stagnant, but James picked up Pietrus' fourth late in the clock. van Gundy continued to hyperventilate, and James missed the second. Cavs by 2, seven minutes to play.

Z with a touch foul, his fifth, on a push to Howard's back. The end of this game is not promising much flow. Pietrus makes a high degree of difficulty three for the lead. James has to force and missed, but Williams gets it back with a transition steal, missed another three, then made a great hustle play to save the possession.

James then made the shot of the night (so far), getting Howard's fifth on a drive and scoop layup for the old school three. With six minutes left, van Gundy leaves Howard out there. The Turk missed a quick and not very good three. James missed a runner, no call. Alston missed another three, and he's 1 of 9 tonight and the sole reason why the Magic aren't ahead. James in stagnation over Alston to make it four. West buys a Turk fake and puts him on the line for three; wow, that's not a good play. The Turk makes three, and it's a 1-point Cavs lead.

LeBron drives on Pietrus, hits Sideshow in the hands, gets the stone deflection, then fed Gibson for another three. Yes, he's really, really good. Wow. Sideshow with a block on the Turk after the Turk walked. A bad Williams three and miss goes off Howard for the Cavs team board. James runs clock on an iso, then makes over Pietrus to push it to six, and while it's not exactly pretty to put the ball in LeBron's hands and watch him do everything, it's also effective, at least tonight. It also tells how much faith van Gundy has in Pietrus, that he keeps letting him try his luck even up; considering how much LeBron is doing without a jump shot, it's not even a bad tactic.

All series long, the Cavs have not gotten stops. Can they start here? Pietrus missed the three badly, and the Cavs run iso clock with LeBron. A great pass to Sideshow ends in a missed dunk and the O-board. LeBron wisely ran clock, then owned Pietrus, fouled out Howard, scored the runner, drained the free throw and, I think, cured cancer. I think we're getting Game Six, folks. Your fresh play of the day there, and start the highlight reel. Nine point game with 2:22 left, and Howard's gone.

Of course, the Magic Will Not Die. Pietrus gets Vareajo's fifth and the old-school three with an awkward drive that could have been a charge, but it's not and it's six. James runs iso clock again, then nails the jumper over Pietrus; huge. Alston's nightmare continues, and the Zerb gets the board. James runs iso clock, but mixes it up with a supreme bullet to Sideshow on the back door, who finally hits the open make and the free throw. The lead is 11, there's 67 seconds left, and Orlando can start the bus. For the first time this series, the Cavs will win a game and deserve it. James with 17 in the fourth, and his line reads 37-14-12 right now, and he's got the most points in Association history for someone playing five games in a conference final. Yes, he's very, very good. Ye. Gads.

The Zerb makes a bonehead foul, but Lewis misses the tech. Lewis fouls out Sideshow, the second straight game he's given all six; his 7-8-2 line tonight was useful, even if his point-blank misses were not. Lewis makes both to get it to nine, but with 62 seconds to go, they'd need to reach deep into the George Karl playbook to blow this one. Z converts on a Gortat foul; it's an 11-point lead with 60 seconds to go. The Turk gets a call on Z, and now he's fouled out as well, and the game will take three hours. Ow.

Williams gets the inbounds and is able to run some clock, blissfully. Williams makes two, and those are the first points in the last 32 (!) that James wasn't involved in. The Turk with a layup, and the Orlando press requires a Cav timeout. 31.2 left, and Just. End. It. Already... and it finally does. Cavs 112, Magic 102.

What it all means for Game Six? Hard to say. James was, if possible, even better tonight; he delivered on possession after possession late, even on a night where his jumper wasn't much. But the Magic were right there on a night where no one really shot very well, and Alston shot terribly. At home, with the refs probably reverting back to them after van Gundy planted seeds all game, it's far more likely than not that they will close it.

But James is simply playing better than anyone since vintage Jordan right now, and you pick against him at your peril. I just hope the game has flow, because as much as James's individual moments make the series riveting, three hours of free throws is just not as good as it should be. We'll see it on Saturday.

The Magic's Trick

When you sit down to watch the Magic try to end the Cavaliers season tonight, they are going to look, to the non-NBA obsessed eye, like a lot of other basketball teams. But they aren't. Here's why.

What you have with the Magic is something of a unique hybrid that straddles a middle ground. On the far left side of the spectrum (yes, everything eventually goes back to politics here), you'd have a team like Phoenix -- fast shots, three pointers, run your opponent into the ground with superior conditioning and score easier points than them; the signature play here is a three in transition as a soul-crushing unequal trade for the opposition's hard-won deuce.

The downside of that approach is that the defense usually falls to pieces, because the coaching staff needs to spend all of their time getting the players to recognize good shots and forget their own numbers, despite the fact that compensation is based on numbers. Also, it's a team based on jumpers, and when they aren't falling -- particularly in half-court grind games, or late in a series when the legs aren't there anymore -- you lose. When this kind of team works, they are a joy to watch, and beloved by fans as if they were a champion, even though they almost never are.

On the far right side of the spectrum would be an old-school walk-it-up power team, like the Shaq and Kobe Lakers, the Billups-era Pistons, and on some level, the Spurs. Here, you stress the importance of every possession and try to make sure that you are always taking more shots than your opponent with superior rebounding and ball-handling; you also get to the line more. This kind of team is more consistent and less explosive, and the downside is that talent acquisition and evaluation is harder, because fewer elite-level players really want to play like this.

Even when it works, it's not very pleasing to the eye, and whether you like it or not, there's a level of artistry to pro hoop, especially among the best and most highly compensated, that has to be indulged. If you don't accommodate this to some extent, you get guys just executing the game plan, rather than being a fanatic about it, and in such differences, wars are won and lost. When this kind of team works, they seize games in the fourth like an anaconda, because the opponent is just unable to get points for 48 minutes against this kind of relentless pressure.

So here is the Magic, and to the naked eye, they look like the Shaq and Kobe Lakers, in that Dwight Howard resembles nothing more than a young and lithe Shaquille O'Neal. His hands aren't as good, but he's a better leaper and more committed on defense; he's also been better at the line, so that you aren't as afraid of using him late in games. It's not a perfect match, but it's 90 to 95% of the way there, and Howard's demeanor is also a good match for Shaq, in that he alternates between determined bulldozer to foul-prone flake.

But he has no Kobe. Hedo Turkoglu is a point forward with a good passing eye and fourth quarter confidence. Rashard Lewis is a matchup problem small forward who is very good from distance, but prone to giving you absolutely nothing if his jumper isn't falling. Neither has Kobe's all-around game, the ability to finish in a game and mood-altering way, or the curse/gift for scoring 1-on-5 if his teammates aren't bringing it.

In the backcourt, the similarities to the Shaq champions really falls apart. None of the Magic guards are the kind of oversized defensive stoppers that the Shaq teams employed. Instead, they are guys that can create their own shot off the dribble more than creating for others, and they all push the tempo. No one calls them tough, or defensive-minded, though they actually are, at least this year.

So are the Magic closer to the Suns-Kings axis? No... because those teams are, by necessity, defined by their point guards, who keep everyone involved and positive by meting out the opportunities to shine, like a conductor. The Magic have no one like that.

They also, and this is really where they aren't like any championship-level team I've seen, do not have a key player who you can neutralize as a tipping point to victory. When Howard is unavailable due to suspension or foul trouble, it makes for better ball movement on offense. When Turkoglu can't find the range, Lewis has a game that can compensate, and vice versa. Sporadic explosions from the guards -- today Rafer Alston, yesterday Courtney Lee, tomorrow Mickael Pietrus -- seem to come easily, because the opposition just has no one they can play off, and in pro hoop, unlike football or baseball, good offense always beats good defense.

When the Magic aren't committed, they look like a soft Euro team, just another in a long line of hoopsters that feel like a passing dome team in football -- i.e., a regular season mirage. But what they are really are, this year and this playoff, is a covert defensive hammer.

Cleveland came into this series as the lockdown masters of opposing three-pointers; after four games, that reputation lies in a smoking ruin. Cleveland has the best player on the floor and the planet, and honestly, I don't think I've ever seen a player better than LeBron James in the first four games of the series. He's a defensive monster, and breathtaking on offense. When he isn't scoring, he's generating some of the easiest looks you'll ever see in a playoff game. His teammates aren't hitting them, not because they are terrible basketball players, but because, despite the easy road in the first two series, their legs have been taken away by this Borg-like team from central Florida.

I've never seen anything like it before, and I don't think we're going to see it for very long, like, say, this year's Celtics. (That team was doomed as soon as they signed Marbury, Garnett injury or no Garnett injury, and now that he's in a career-ending way with that knee, they are a 50-win and timber mode, because Allen and Pierce can't stay this good. But I digress.)

The Magic will tune out Stan van Gundy soon enough. When Howard develops more of a post-up game (honestly, what he's got now is kind of embarrassing for a guy with this level of publicity; it's Ben Wallace-esque) and Jameer Nelson returns, the balance will be thrown out of whack. They also won't be able to keep all of the pieces over time, and the loss of someone like Pietrus could be as problematic for them as, say, the Celtics losing James Posey last year.

But for the time being, they are fascinating, dangerous, and could have the highest ceiling of any of the final four teams. For a club that looked vulnerable in the first round to a middling Sixers team, heart-free against the D-league deep Celtics, and the near-universal fast out against the Association's best regular season team with playoff rest and home court... well, it's all unprecedented stuff.

And no, I'm still not really believing it myself, because my faith in James is nearly absolute.

But with just one more win, they'll prove me, and the rest of the world outside of central Florida, definitively wrong.

At least for this year.

205 Drop: Top 10 approaching ethical crises in sports

Today's list is educational all over. For instance, I wasn't quite sure of the plural of crisis before. But seriously...

It has long been the belief of this writer that, as base and craven meatbags, we're in a bad way to deal with the ever-increasing speed of ethical concerns that breakthrough tech can bring. As a very small aside/example... I am, on average, a fairly dramatically short adult male. (How much? I'm looking up at Nate Robinson, and eye to eye with Muggsy Bogues. It comes in handy on trains and planes.) This (really, honestly, truly) doesn't bother me, and I'm sure it helped me develop my grinding worker ways; I wouldn't change my size, even with a pain-free one-shot pill.

But what if the Shooter Wife and I had the ability to give that one-shot pain-free height pill to the Shooter Kids? Would they be better off being more likely to be average height? (And, um, especially if the Shooter Kids were male.) And if we really want to up the ante into realms of not sports and not politically correct, substitute "sexual orientation" for "height."

In any event, my brain isn't big enough to deal. So, um, very big brained people? Please work these questions out, and fast, because the tech isn't slowing down... and I'm not sure our brains are speeding up.

Anyway, go click, post a comment, tell me I'm short, etc. And thanks, as always, for reading.

Lakers-Nuggets Game Five: Welcome to the Series, Lamar Odom

Tonight in Los Angeles, the Lakers took the predictable 3-2 lead over the unpredictable Nuggets, with a surging fourth quarter run that showed just how potent this team is (a) when their bigs show up, (b) when Kobe Bryant doesn't dominate the ball, (c) when they are at home with the winds to their backs, (d) when Phil Jackson buys the refs with his annual costly referee jockeying, (e) when they've lost a game and have had their hearts questioned. Pick any that apply, or all. And now, your micro-blog.

The first quarter was back and forth, with neither team getting any real separation; the signature play was Chris Anderson rising to block a Lamar Odom dunk attempt with seconds left in the quarter, which kept it tied. The Lakers shot the ball much better, but lost the rebound battle by five as the Nugget bigs continued to dominate. Kobe Bryant worked to get others involved, taking only two shots and generating two assists (along with two turnovers). Chauncey Billups hit two three-pointers but also two fouls, and considering that the home team usually jumps out to an early lead, a tied game wasn't too bad for the Nugs.

The second quarter started with a nice play by JR Smith to set up Kenyon Martin, but he missed the free throw; already four misses from the lines for the Nuggets. As usually happens, the start of the second quarter was ragged, marked by Carmelo Anthony stretching his bad shooting to 1 for 6 before a nice shake and bake jumper. The Laker offense seemed awkward, but Odom collected Anderson's second foul, showing his usual home-court-only aggression. The refs let the Lakers go with some exceptionally physical interior defense, and both teams looked like they left their legs in Game 4.

Anderson guarded Gasol nicely in the post, leading to a Smith make and a three-point Nugget lead. The Lemur gives us the never-tedious celeb roll, ending with more Jack Nicholson face time, because that guy never gets any pub. Bynum found Walton for a lay up where Walton was open for so long, the audience called for it, and I'm not sure how that wasn't three seconds. In general, I wasn't very impressed by the Nugget energy here, but Smith was playing well, and the Nuggets score easily than the Lakers, just from the bigs.

The Lakers played volleyball on the o-glass to tie it back up, but Nene finds Carter -- really, I had no idea the big man was such a good interior passer -- to tie it back up. Bynum got Carter's second foul and made the first, then saw Odom collect the second free throw miss for a fresh possession; Odom then fed Bynum for a made hook, and Bynum is showing some small flash of utility there. After the ads, the Lakers volleyball but can't finish, and Kleiza avoids three Lakers on a runner for the lead. Nene got whistled on a 50/50 loose ball, Fisher with the makes and new lead. Kleiza got Bryant's second foul, this one on a three, and to say that Kobe has snoozed so far this first half would be 100% true. Kleiza made one of three, and that's 6 of 12 from the line. A miss trade ended with Garol finding Bynum for the flush, and the younger Laker big now has 9 points on the night, albeit with another free throw miss.

Anthony to the rack and looking stronger. Bryant walks baldly, and even the most hard-core Association hater has to admit that the traveling calls have been made in this playoff season, at least for the most part. Billups missed a three, and the Lakers answer with good ball movement on confused Nugget rotation, but the Fisher miss from the arc now makes them 0 for 7, and Anthony gets an easy block call on Odom in transition. The Lake Show was in the penalty, and Melo made both for the new lead.

Despite all of the back and forth and the stakes, the game wasn't all that good here; just a dead crowd and the sense that no one should get too excited, since we all know this game is going to the wire. A Fisher layup; an Anderson dunk in transition. Kobe draws the third from Billups -- rut roh! -- with 2:35 left in the half and the Nuggets up by two. Furious George leaves him in anyway. After a pair of Kobe makes, Smith drained a three, but Bryant answered with a circus layup for an old-school three over Anthony; heck of a play by the Mamba. Melo's answer is very nice and healthy, from the top of the key. Odom to Bryant at the cup, and the stars are feeling it. Anthony fed Carter for a corner three. Home Court Odom fed Gasol at the rim for the make and Nene foul; it's missed, but the o-board follow isn't, and that's a four-point trip. Anthony owns

Walton to the line for two makes, and he now has 13 and is looking like his old unstoppable self. Fisher couldn't connect, and Martin called time on the floor to save the possession. The game picked up a little at the end of the second, but no one is mistaking this for crunch time intensity just yet. Karl puts Kleiza in for offense on the last possession, and the Nuggets fail to inbound as Kleiza turned it. Just inexcusable, if you're a Nugget fan, but that's who they are. Bryant fed Vujacic for the Lakers' first three of the night; he had all day to line that up, and it tied the game. Vujacic is shooting 23% for the series, but maybe he can pick it up after that; he certainly can't be any worse. Anthony's half court bank misses, and the first half ended even up at 56.

In a way, I feel the same about this game as I did Cavs-Magic last night -- that the star was doing what he could to have his teammates get comfortable, but knowing that they're going to have to saddle up and lead. But with the Nugs playing as if winning this game was more optional than mandatory in the first, maybe the Mamba picked to right time to conserve his jets.

The third quarter starts with a bang, with Anthony nailing a three and Bryant answering at the rim on a feed from Odom. Dahntay Jones collets an o-board for a layup. The teams traded misses, and Ariza then made an awkward drive and lay up. The Lakers continue to disregard Martin's jumper to their peril off a Billups feed. Bryant owns Jones on a pull up, and the Mamba is now 5 of 6 from the floor; danger, Will Nugget. Jones collected Bynum's third foul and made both for the 3-point lead, 3 minutes in.

Nene with a nice steal, and Anthony makes one of those hidden plays that mean points later on a great catch from a terrible entry pass. Another arc-free Martin jumper goes to make the lead five. Ariza draws Nene's fourth on a pump fake behind the arc, just a terrible decision by Nene. At least there hasn't been any technicals tonight, mostly because there also hasn't been a whole lot of energy. Man, you people are some spoiled sons of bitches.

Jones with a make and a miss, but Anderson gets the board and fed Anthony, who scores and goes to the line on his own. He makes his free throw, and the four point trip pushes the lead to 7, the Nuggets' largest. Bynum picks up his fourth and a turnover; Odom returned for him. The Nuggets volleyball for o-boards but can't score. Anderson's fourth (!) block of the game comes on a drive, but the Nugs turn on the trip back, leading to a Gasol dunk. People talk about how Gasol needs more shots, but the real issue is that the Lakers just don't pass that well, and it's not like Gasol can get down low without the entry pass.

After the commerce, Gasol stops Jones at the rim, and flow be damned; Chris Anderson is going to call time on the floor with a loose ball, and does. Jones with another o-board and make. Bryant with another good assist as Bwon gets the lay up. Anthony feeling it with the drives, but Lakers are D'ing up here and now. Billups turns it, and Brown finishes over Anderson. A good coach calls time there, but not George. Billups turns it on the next trip down, but Bryant matches with his third foul of the way. Anthony travels, the third straight turn for the Nuggets. Still no Karl timeout. Odom hits the open three, and the game is tied. Heckuva game you are watching, George. Fourth straight Denver turnover on good Laker defense. Crowd getting into it now. Bryant missed a long three, Odom can't control it, and we get a TV timeout to stop the bleeding for the Nuggets.

Billups with a monster triple out of timeout, but Kobe Does Not Care, and make his own right back. Martin's jumper missed. Odom begs for a call to no avail on a miss. Smith with a bad and missed three. Smith damn near kills himself on a steal attempt, but can't control it. Odom turned it, leading to Anderson missing at the cup. Smith gets the board and runs clock before missing, Bryant's pass, picked. The third ends with Smith missing from the arc, and just like at the end of the first and second, we're tied after three, 76-all. Buckle up, folks.

A quick flurry to open the fourth to give the Lakers a five-point lead, the largest lead of the game for LA, with Odom continuing his solid game; he's now at 14-9-3, with 3 blocks, and the simple fact is that when Odom plays well, the Lakers rarely lose. Nene got his fifth on a push, and Laker Fan smelled blood as the Brazilian added a technical to the trouble. Bryant missed it to keep it at 5 with 9:33 left. Odom again in the lane to push the lead to seven. Anthony missed the three as Anderson got hammered on the o-board attempt; coming back the other way, Anthony clocks Bryant with a foul that would have been flagrant if Bryant was smaller. Kobe made both and the lead is nine. Anthony missed a tough runner. Brown drains a beautiful leaner as the clock expires, and the Nuggets are not long for this game if things don't change soon.

Two Anthony makes from the line stops the bleeding, but only for a moment, as Gasol scores over Anderson; the Nuggets defense is just not good right now. Kleiza with a corner three to make it 8. Gasol down low on Anderson, and it's a pick and roll clinic right now. Gasol makes two to push it to 10. Anthony can't finish at the rim; nice Gasol block there. With 6:35 left, the Lakers lead by 10, and it's like they just flicked the switch in this game.

Anthony blocks Walton, and Kleiza shows good speed to get to the rack; 8 ponit game. Walton can't finsh inside. Kleiza misses the three after Billups defers. Nugs get another turn. Kleiza fed Nene down low, and he misses a wild layup rather than dunk it. Lakers nearly turn it again on a Smith steal, but Bynum gets it on the floor and calls time. Four second to shoot, 4:58 to go, down 8. Not a game the Lakers should lose, especially not with Kobe Bryant, and especially not with Brayant fresh... but he misses the three, and Kleiza continues his solid play by going hard to the rim and getting the call on Odom. Two makes, and it's six. Nugs are getting something from this small line up... and then Smith stripped Bryant, leading to a Melo slam. Four point game.

At the 4:02 mark, Gasol picks up Nene's sixth on a very questionable blocking foul -- how you block a guy when the offensive player hits you in the gut with an elbow, I have no idea -- but the home team gets calls. Two makes pushed it to six. Melo down low, gets Fisher's fifth, not quite a get even call. Melo now 11 of 12 from the line, a big part of his game. Gasol feeds Ariza on a back door cut, and the Nugs defend it horribly; Kleiza with the foul for the old-school three. Gasol's fifth block on Anthony is huge, and the Lake Show now has five in double figures. Another questionable call, this one on Billups on an errant entry pass to Odom, and the karmic misses are inevitable. Odom and the basket blocks Martin at the rim, and if this Odom showed up every night, the Lakers would be as good as they think they are. Martin gets the block back on Gasol, and the refs are letting things go, with Ariza the next to take advantage, erasing Anthony at the other end. The Nugs got the team board, and there's 144 seconds left and a 7-point Laker lead. In other words, the Nuggets are going to have to be close to perfect to pull this one out, and I don't like their chances.

Billups three misses out of the inbounds; this could be over soon. Not on a Laker turn, but Smith misses the open three. Fisher misses horribly, and Anthony drives and scores to make it five. The Nugs are 3 for their last 21, and still in the game, Amazing. With 65 seconds left, Kleiza and Anthony both inexplicably move away from Bryant, leaving a clear passing path to Odom, who was also open. Wow. Old school three, 8 point lead, ball game. Kleiza missed, and this one's over; Bryant makes two to make it 10. Anthony drives and scores an old-school three, just to show that Trevor Ariza doesn't have much of a basketball IQ, either. Melo puts Fisher on the line, just hoping for drama, two makes gets none. Smith misses a three, the Nuggets don't foul, and that is that. Lakers 103, Nuggets 94.

I don't mean to chastise the Nugs overly much, or to disparage the Lakers; the former weren't going to win this game, or this series, because then the Lakers bring their "A" game, they beat this team, and probably the Eastern reps, too. They are also going to win Game Six, because the Lakers don't show up on the road when they don't have to. But for all of the good things this team has done in this playoff season, and for all of the good feelings that people have from Billups' return and Anthony's emergence, they will never -- never -- get to the Promised Land with George Karl as their coach.

Karl as your coach means small guys inbounding late. Karl as your coach means coddling talented rockheads like Smith, Jones and . Karl as your coach means that players like Kleiza have no clue on help defense late in the game, and that the bigs can't stay out of foul trouble, and that everyone on the team feels compelled to take technical fouls. There's a reason why he's never won, despite some really good talent (the Kemp/Payton Sonics, the Cassells/Robinson/Allen Bucks, these Nuggets, etc., etc.); he just doesn't control his team enough to win when there's no margin for error, and at this point in the Association's development, there are no teams with that margin for error. Game Six is in Denver on Friday...

and as a small programming note, FTT won't be covering that one live, as I'm previously booked. So enjoy the inevitable Nugget win to force LA to win in seven, tune in on Saturday or so to catch my recap, and we'll all regroup on Sunday, when Melo gets his chance to earn the undying hatred of the ABC honchos that really aren't hoping for a Kobe-free Finals. Even in the best playoff year in the history of the Association, some things are predictable.

Blogrolling knows where the bodies are buried

MLJ with the true crime story of spreading his mother's ashes at Fenway. Kind of amazing on many levels, and certain to become a huge story, I think.

Barney Frank continues to make me happy. Harry Reid? Well, let's just say I wasn't thrilled to have to speak well of him in 2004 when I canvassed in Reno, and I'm even less thrilled about it now.

National MLB ratings on Fox down about 9% from last year, 23% from 2000.

Meanwhile, the NBA is getting some of its highest ratings ever.

Fran Tarkenton is not a Favre hag. But he does speak the obvious truth that, well, anyone with eyes who hasn't been polishing Brett's knob for quotes over the past decade knows. It's the little things in life that make you happy, really.

205 Drop: Top 10 items on my sports bucket list

Some nice morbid moments on this list, and if I'm lucky, a headline grabbing amount of interest for my refusal to get over my hate for Harold Katz. Go check it out, will you?

Cavs-Magic Game Four: 48 Minutes Wasn't Enough, But 17 3's Were

Straight to the micro-blog for the continuing saga of the best playoff year in the history of the Association...

I missed the first half as per usual for family obligations, but judging from the game trackers, Orlando came out fast in the first with threes, but the Cavs finally got some support for James. Mo Williams managed twelve in the first half on multiple trips to the line, and Boobie Gibson emerged from utter irrelevance to make two triples, one to close out the half. Add in a little Delonte West support, and the Cavs look like themselves again, and the half ended at Cavs 58, Magic 50. Looking at the numbers, it's hard to see how, but at this point in the series, the Cavs will take any lead they can get.

At the start of the third, Rafer Alston made three in a row on lax pressure from James to cut it to one, and in just 130 seconds, the lead was down to 1, and Magic Fan was alive. After the timeout, James got to the rack and picked up Howard's second on the old-school three. The Turk's new school three attempt was off, but the Cavs turned as James continued to look a little passive, at least in comparison to previous games. Lewis missed, leading to Williams scoring off the rebound, and Alston answered with his fourth three. West scored over Lee to make it five again, and then West found Vareajo alone at the rim for the flush. Doug Collins correctly called out Dwight Howard, who is just not into this game defensively, at least not this half. The Magic's run was answered.

After the timeout, the Turk hit the Magic's ninth triple of the night, and Vareajo missed a dunk. Lee missed the triple, and Williams tossed in a nice banked off side runner, adding in a Lee foul for the three point play. Z stripped Howard down low and got clocked for his trouble; incidental, but ye gads, and the big man is not pleased. Alston got a banked three to fall, and everything is going in for him right now. Z missed from the corer, and Alston picked up a charge on James to boot. Vareajo with a great steal on the Turk, but Williams couldn't get the three, and the Turk answered with a bank to get it back to two. West posts the Turk beautifully to stop the bleeding. Alston finally missed a three, and James drew Howard's third with a spin move; lazy, dumb foul on Howard, and Magic Fan doesn't cover himself in glory by howling at the replay. James made one, and Vareajo picked up a loose ball foul and some pain. Howard wrestled a loose ball away from the corner, and Vareajo tried to foul before the dunk to Howard's disgust. The refs want nothing of Howard's disgust, and that's his sixth technical of the playoffs, a major issue for the Magic. Patrick Ewing picks one up from the bench as well, and Magic Fan sings the Bulls*** Song very, very loudly. Hopefully, this won't lead to 18 minutes of free throws.

Once all that was over, it was 74-71 Cavs. West missed the corner three, but Howard continued his awkward play with a turnover rebound. James drains the three over Pietrus, and when he hits that, it's Crazy Time for his opponents. Alston with a bad miss, but West couldn't add ot the lead. Wallace battled Howard well down low, and the Turk took a foul to stop the break. Pietrus flops on James for a no-call, but Williams can't hit, and Pietrus answered with a three. Gibson couldn't make, and the Cavs are taking too many from distance right now. Two Turk makes cut it back to one.

Very physical defense from the Magic ends with Howard goaltending Wallace, and the Cavs are actually getting something from him tonight, as he follows up by taking a charge on Pietrus. James settles for a long three and misses, and Alston got the dish -- he now has 15 in the quarter, and 21 for the game -- to cut it back to one. James with another bad iso three, and Alston misses from 35 to close the quarter. It's a Magic win, but the Cavs still have the lead, 79-78.

Van Gundy hates his team in the TNT interview. Big surprise! Williams missed the jumper, and Pietrus gets Wallace in the air, but West goes hard for the block, and that's just playoff basketball, along with West's third foul. Pietrus misses both to add to West's karma. The Ghost of Wally Sczerbiak missed, and Howard gets hacked on the board. Pietrus makes a go-ahead three on great ball movement. James can't finish at the rim, but Z can to tie it; Alston responds immediately, and so does Z with his jump shot. Much more balanced attack from the Cavs, but Alston hits again, his sixth three pointer of the night. I'm not sure when Alston sold his soul, but Magic Fan isn't bemoaning the loss of Jameer Nelson right now...

The Magic got a ridiculous home-court call on the inbounds and that's a shot clock violation; I'm pretty sure the buzzer sounded before the ball was even touched. Lewis with the bank gave the Magic a five point lead, and the Cavs were on the ropes. A Zerb miss and a Wallace board leads to a James miss; Pietrus can't sink the dagger, but Williams can't finish tin the trees. Zerb flops on Howard before a dunk. With 8:05 left, the Magic lead by five, have the ball, and just look like the best team in basketball right now. Color me surprised.

The Turk and West return for Wallace and Lewis. The Turk misses from the baseline, but gets the O-board and finds Lee for the triple -- the Magic's 14th -- and the lead was 8. James to the rim in Determined Mode, and he gets to the line, but only makes one. The lead was 7. James blocks Howard from behind, but the MVP then missed Z with a pass for an unforced turnover. Pietrus to the tin, but can't finish, and the Cavs are sloppy but lucky with the ball. I don't like their game right now; it's all one on one, but at least its James doing it, and he gets the call on Pietrus, and two makes got it back to five. James with 27 now.

Howard walks and misses, just a sad move for a great player, and Z got the board. West hits from the post, but Lewis answered, and it's still five. James posts Pietrus and gets a layup; better offense from the Cavs now, and Howard continued his indifferent game with late weakside help. Lewis turns on decent defense from, of all people, the Zerb. It's a 3-point game with the Cavs having the ball at 4:55, and Magic Fan has to feel more antsy now.

Howard and Vareajo each have four fouls; no one else has that many. James with a great drive and dish, but West can't make the tying three, and Lewis nails the Magic's 15th from 30 attempts. I don't know if any team can lose when they shoot 50% from the arc on this many attempts. James turns it. The Turk misses, but the Magic get the team board on good Howard effort. Alston finally missed from the arc, and James finds Vareajo in the lane for the make and a Turk foul; his free throw cuts it back to three with 3 minutes left. The Turk walks baldly on a drive, and it's called. Just another classic game here; I don't root for either of these teams, and I'm totally into the game. I can't imagine how Cleveland Fan or Orlando Fan feels.

James elbows Pietrus hard on a spin and drive, and the Frenchman goes down for James' fourth foul and a bad turnover. Pietrus got up and stayed in the game. Vareajo turns a pass to Howard, but James turns it back, his second in a row. Pietrus with a three miss, and this time in transition James goes to the rack with killing speed for the flush. Vareajo has to foul Howard down low, his fifth, and Howard missed the first badly, and the second goes down; 2 point game, 100 seconds left. Wow.

West drives on Howard and scores; just nice. Alston missed. James to the lane and draws Howard's fifth, and he can give Cleveland the lead... but he missed the first badly. The second goes down, and that's a 1-point lead with 1 minute to go.

The Turk can't get the three, and it was an ugly possession. The Cavs match with James missing. No timeout. Pietrus can't get the three to fall, but West fell/was tripped on good hustle from Howard, and the Magic got the ball back with 6.4 seconds left. For every Association detractor who wants to talk about how the last minute takes forever, I give you this game -- it just freaking breezed by, mostly because I think both of these teams are too exhausted to do anything else.

Will Cleveland contest the inbounds, unlike Game Two? The Cavs bring in Wallace, and James doesn't contest until the last second, when the Turk calls for time; no Magic player was close to clear on that. Hmm. Some ref issue delays things, and Lee comes in for Alston. The Turk finds Lewis unconscionably open on the uncontested inbounds, and he drains the Magic's 16th three of the night. Wallace will wear goat horns for that and should, but give credit to Lewis for being that difficult a cover. The only problem is it might have happend too fast, as there is still 4.1 seconds left on the clock, and the Magic are only up two, but can LeBron James win two games in the same series with miracles?

Will the Magic guard the inbounds? It's Williams. He finds James, and with five tenths of a second left, James gets the block call on Pietrus. Conspiracy theorists will look askance at that call, but when the best player on the planet goes down in a tangle of limbs on a drive at the buzzer against a no-name defensive player... well, I'm sorry, Magic Fan, but that call will be made for the offense 100 times out of 100.

James had to make both to tie. The first is all cotton. The second just leaked in, and James knew he got away with something there. With half a second on the clock for the Magic to dodge overtime, Z guarded the Turk inbounds. A lob to Howard draws contact with Vareajo, and that's going to be a controversial no-call, especially after the James draw on Pietrus, but I'm not even sure that it shouldn't have been Howard to get the over the back call, or from hooking Vareajo's arm. Just an impossible situation for the refs; a no-call is probably their bet option. 100-all, and it's free basketball time.

The Turk is owned by Vareajo with a steal, and Gibson gets to the line in transition; he made both. Howard drove Vareajo into dust with an old-school Shaq dunk. James turns it. West and Vareajo fall, and Howard flushes for the lead. West missed, but Vareajo boards, and James hits the three to take the lead back. Howard again on Vareajo, too easy. James turns it, and Vareajo picks up his sixth by proximity; that's going to hurt, not that anyone is stopping Howard right now. Z replaces Sideshow.

Pietrus hits the three right away on the weak Cav pick and roll defense, which is the problem with Z. James misses from the arc at the clock, and the Magic now lead by four with he ball, and James looked tired on that miss. 100 seconds left. Alston's three front rims, but James turns it for the eight time in transition. The Turk walks and misses, but the first isn't called and the second is finished by the suddenly dominant Howard, and it's a six-point game with 72 seconds left. The Cavs look dead in the water. Again.

James scoops and scores; he has 39. The Turk misses on a bad drive, but James gets a call on Lewis on a drive, and he hits both to make it two points again. James just won't die. Howard gets it down low, and Wallace gives the foul; 21 seconds left. Howard makes both; huge, and he's got 27-14-4, 10 of the Magic's 13 points in overtime. The Magic let the Cavs back into this game with missed threes late; they've taken the lead in the overtime by forgetting about that shot.

James is blocked by Pietrus and Howard, and it's a jump ball call with 16.5 left. At this point, the Magic should really just win this game; Howard has the reach and height on James, and it's a two possession game with little time on the clock, really. James got the tip anyway, saving to West; James got Howard in the air at the arc, but the refs don't give the call. Z to to the line on a whistle against Pietrus, his fifth. Z made both to cut it two, and West fouled Lewis on the inbounds, the man the Magic want to have the ball here. Lewis makes both, and that should be that... and Lewis had 4 points through the first three quarters, and ends with 16. James makes an insane three off the catch, and I can't imagine the human that can do that at the end of 53 minutes. Lewis goes to the line and misses the first, and with 3.2 seconds left, it's, amazingly, still a game. He makes the second, and Cleveland has to inbound from their own basket. The inbounds gets to James, and from 40 feet, moving left to right against seemingly the entire Magic team... James finally misses. Magic 3, Cavs 1, 116-114, and what a game, what a series, what a year.

The most meaningful thing to take out of tonight's game is that the Magic took Cleveland's best shot -- balanced scoring from West, Williams, some support from Gibson and Z and Wallace, another 44-12-7 from James -- and won. They made 17 three pointers, got a 27-14-4 from Howard, and took the game they had to have, mostly because they limited Cleveland's assists and, well, rained down threes like a Biblical plague.

I still think Cleveland wins this series, because I've just never seen a team depend so much on three pointers go all the way... but the Magic are just a game away from making believers out of all of us. Or should I say... witnesses?

205 Drop: Top 12 ways to get a small child through an MLB game

Today's drop goes to dark places while having tons of useful suggestions for the baseball-loving parent. Honestly, your best move for such things is to never buy very good seats -- the kid will never be able to take anything less -- pack food if the stadium allows it, and keep in mind that you're not really going to see a game, so much as you are trying to indoctrinate a new person that will take you to games when you are old and feeble. Anyway, go click, there's some nice nastiness today.

Lakers-Nuggets Game Four: Denver Rebounds, and Rebounds, and Rebounds

Tonight in Denver, in a game where the home team got little from their best player, the Nuggets more or less ran the Lakers out of the building, because the Lakers are just that gutless, and didn't need the game, or much want it. That may sound harsh, or dismissive of a great night for Kenyon Martin, Nene and Chris Anderson, but having seen this Lakers team do the same thing a few weeks ago in Houston... well, ask any Lakers Fan, and he'll tell you I'm not wrong. (He'll also tell you that Kobe isn't a blight on the face of humanity, so don't believe everything he says...)

And now, the micro-blog; there will also be Final Thoughts after the minutaie. I missed the first half of this game due to family obligations, which means I miss Carmelo Anthony's 1-for-11 half, as well as his early exit with an ankle problem. Despite the terrible work from their best player, the home team was still up 7, mostly due to J.R. Smith, Birdman Anderson and Kenyon Martin -- in other words, three sources that aren't likely to hold up in crunch time. Despite shooting 38% in the first half, and getting an incredible load of nothing from their bench -- 3 points on 1 of 8 shooting in 38 minutes from six players, including Lamar Odom -- the Lake Show was just down seven at the half. I didn't see the half, but I can't imagine Nugget Fan is geeling all that great about their chances right now, and if Anthony is incapacitated, that would make the second straight series in which the Lakers have seen their opponent lose their best player due to injury.

The second half began with listless Nugget play and an old-school Gasol three. Anthony got away with a walk en route to a layup, and the Nuggets defense picked up with a steal. The Lemur told us that Anthony had an IV and a re-tape on the ankle, neither of which helped his three-pointer go down; he doesn't look right to me. Anthony then made a great hustle play to start a break; Nene made a nice pass to close that. Ariza's wide open three stopped the bleeding and made it five; Billups whiffed on the answer. Gasol made an easy hook, and after a miss, Fisher's three hit every part of the rim and stayed out; the trip back gets Nene to the rim after a Melo drive and miss to push the lead back to four. Ariza was denied at the rim by good Nugget big work, and Billups then makes a classic drive to blow past Odom and create contact on Gasol for the old-school three. Seven point game again, which means the first four minutes of the second were even.

Jones collects Ariza's third on a block, which given how bad the Laker bench was in the first, could be meaningful. Bryant cut it back to seven, and it's just like he's lurking in this game right now. A miss and a Billups make brings it up to 11, and that's a 10-2 Nugget run: hmm. Odom with just one make, and Nene volleyballed for a putback and his double-double. Odom hits a three as Jones abd Bryant got tangled up, and Kobe was irate. Another Melo miss from three, and another o-board from the Nugget bigs, their 14th, ending with a Martin make; the Denver bigs were in control. A frantic Laker possession ended with Odom not finishing the o-board, and Ariza getting the call on a loose ball with Anthony.

At the 3:54 mark, Bryant doesn't get a technical, despite two solid minutes of chirping over the Jones call, which the Lemur cameras now show might not have been an accident. The Kobe I remember destroyed guys for cheap shots; curious to see how he reacts now, in a game the Lakers don't need. The Lakers got into foul trouble, but Anderson missed two, and the lead stayed at 11 when it should have gone higher -- but Kenyon Martin gets to 13 and 13, and then Anderson follows his miss with a slam, and you could file a missing persons report for Lamar Odom right now. Yeesh.

Chris Anderson missed his corner heat check three. Um, that's Nugget basketball, and I'm not kind in that assessment. The Lemur dwells on Jones' trip on Bryant, and in retrospect, yes, a clear flagrant. Smith drills a triple to make it 14, and Bryant couldn't answer, but Billups can't can the necessary transition shot, and the Lake Show enters with a Vujacic corner three. Smith's heat check three missed, as did the final Lake Show shot, and the third quarter ends with the Nuggets up 11.

I got the feeling, from watching this quarter, that the Laker Run was coming, and that Bryant was just biding his time. But why it didn't come earlier, as an immediate response to the Jones trip, was curious. Was he biding his time, disgusted with his bigs, exhausted from carrying his bench, not feeling the need since he already had home court... all of these questions. The Nuggets had 47 rebounds to the Lakers 29 in the first three quarters. Unreal.

Bynum made an easy bank off a nice Walton pass to start the fourth, then got a block at the rim. Vujacic continued his nightmare year with a miss, and Bynum ended his useful play with his third foul, this one on Smith. Smith missed both free throws, then a bad three; what an idiot this guy is. Bynum made another to cut it back to 7, and Vujacic ties up Smith; who wins the tip. Billups gets the old-school three and gets up hobbling, and that was Bynum's fourth foul in 19 minutes. Let's just say that I'm not seeing Bynum's name in Laker big man history. Smith steals, and Billups finally gets one of those Mr. Big Shot triples to land, an absolute rainbow out of transition, to push it back to 13. Live by the instant triple dagger attempt, die by the instant triple dagger attempt...

Brown got one of two on a drive. Nene feeds Smith on a flush, and the Nuggets are feeling very good about themselves right about now. Walton missed from the arc on a bad decision, but collected the O-board and Smith's fourth foul. For some reason, Luke Walton picks up a technical after more or less ordinary contact with Nene, which Billups drains, and that's a 15-point game. Bynum picked up Anderson's second, but can't finish the old-school three. A Kleiza triple makes it 16 with 8:40 left, and the bus is leaving for the airport after Walton's loose ball foul on the other end. With 8:30 left and down 16, time is running out on that Laker run I was expecting; this is the largest lead of the series for Denver, and Bryant is still on the bench. Hey, if you're not going to try to win the game, Coach Philip, why not make it obvious and send Bryant home early?

Billips missed from the corner. Odom finally shows his height, and picked up a foul on Kleiza; he got it to 15 at the line. After a bad Smith miss, Farmer makes over Billups, but missed the free throw. Gasol sat next to Bryant, and Smith picked up a technical because he's just that kind of dumb and the refs are that kind of scared; Vujacic blows it badly to keep it at 13, but hits his three to make it 10 with 7 minutes left. Finally, Jackson decides the game is worth Bryant's time, just in time to watch Anthony make two from the line. It was 12 with 6:43 left.

Bryant's three missed, and so did his bank shot two after an Odom o-board. Anthony feeds Anderson down low, who picks up a flagrant from Bynum, who's about as subtle as a wrestling heel with his two-handed hammer job. I think if I were a Laker Fan, I'd welcome any new Bynum injury right about now; it really does seem that the team is better off with Josh Powell or even DJ Mbenge. The intent might not have been flagrant, but the body language was, and Anderson's made both to push it back to 14. Billups missed, and Bryant answers, but doesn't get the extra foul call, and lobbies for it afterward. I guess when Kobe says he's not going to get his sixth technical this year, he must be referring to an NBA memo to the refs.

Anthony answers with an old-school three, but Bryant makes a ridiculous jumper. Anthony goes iso on Walton for an ugly possession, but it ended well for him with Walton's fifth foul, but only one make. Bryant drains another three to make it 11, and he's starting to glow with nuclear power, but Anthony fed Smith for a straight up three to answer. Bryant continues to fire from distance and finally missed, but Gasol collected the board and got to the line on an Anderson foul, and two makes cuts it to 12 with 4:05 left. It's antsy time in Denver.

Anthony ends Walton's night easily, with six fouls in 13 minutes. Jackson pulled a jerk move by delaying to substitute Brown for Walton. Anthony made two to push it back to 14. The Laker offense now is Have Bryant Do It, and Anthony gets his fourth foul and a technical, because it's Everyone Gets A Technical Night in Denver, and this is the second straight night that the Association is going to see over 70 free throws in a 48 minute game. Martin picks up a technical next, and just laughs as Gasol didn't get one as well; Bryant makes it to cut it to 10.

Smith missed a three, but another o-board, this one by Melo, burns more clock, and Odom fouled Billups, who made both. The Nuggets are up by 17 boards and 13 free throws. Anthony collects his fifth foul trying to guard Bryant, which means that someone else will be getting whistled the next time down the floor. Bryant makes both and this game may last 4 hours. The Lakers almost turn Billups but can't, and Smith goes to the line on Brown; he made just one.

Billups on Bryant this time down, and a deflection lets us go to commercial with 2:51 left and an 11-point Nugget lead. It's 8 minutes to midnight on the East Coast, and as much as I love hoop, I don't love this game; it's just 100% Flow Free, and while I'd like to credit the Nuggets for being morons, the simple fact of the matter is that when you have four technicals in a half and 52 fouls and counting, you have bad officiating.

An awful turnover off the inbounds -- and hey, the Lakers can do that, too! -- results in a Billups layup. Bryant misses another quick three, but the Laker bigs collect the board, and Brown scores it. Denver solved the Laker trap, ran clock, and got a Smith three with 2 minutes left. Bryant misses a drive, and Smith cans another three to end all suspense, then proceeds to walk like a doofus back up the floor, because that's just Nugget Basketball. It takes work to be the second-most likable team in a series with Kobe Bryant, especially when you get here on hard work, but the Nuggets do what they can...

Brown with a three to make it closer, but it's 14 points with 79 seconds to go, which is to say, Impossible. After the timeout, Nene off a dish from Billups, and Karl pulls out Billups and Anthony, wisely. The last minute was garbage time, punctuated by a Jones slam and general Nugget happiness. The final was Denver 120, LA 101.

A few final thoughts on this:

1) If J.R. Smith shows up like this in Los Angeles, the Nuggets can win this series. He won't.

2) If the refs want to make us forget how good this playoff year has been, just keep calling every possible touch foul and technical.

3) Andrew Bynum is cursed.

4) Phil Jackson knows when his team is quitting, and quits first.

5) The next two days, you will hear nothing but how bad the Laker bigs played. Then, they'll play well enough to win Game Five.... and fail to show again in Game Six.

6) Post-game, Karl talked about how J.R. Smith drove him crazy. Um, George? That's because his coach enables him to do all of that nonsense. Why don't you just make Billups the coach already?

7) Kenyon Martin is Lamar Odom's Kryptonite. That, and any serious amount of adversity.

8) As bad as the Lakers played tonight, they were close late -- and Jackson had Bryant and Gasol on the pine. Game Five, they'll both play 42+ minutes, and LA will win.

205 Drop: Top 10 Historical Lays

Today's list for 205 is one of those classic Dumb Guy hypotheticals: who would you want to have relations with throughout history? I went partly from personal lust, partly from societal responsibility (you, yes you, could save the Beatles), and partly from the dream we all dream of -- being the very worst soul in Heaven. Enjoy the blasphemy!

Cavs-Magic Game Three: Dwight Howard Is Speed Magic

Tonight in Orlando, Dwight Howard was the best player on the floor, despite being on it for barely half of the available minutes. He led his team to a 2-1 series lead in a sluggish, foul-filled game that was compelling more for the stakes than the play, though there were still a half-dozen jaw-dropping moments, not the least of which is that LeBron James scored 41 on a night where his jump shot was less productive than mine. And now, the micro-blog...

In the first, the Magic came out with the usual home court bump and a sudden surge of usefulness from Rafer Alston, but didn't score enough, despite Cleveland turnovers, to take a big lead. In the second, the Cavs bench started with an 8 point surge to get it to one, but an offense of Joe Smith and Delonte West can only take you so far, and the Magic got useful minutes out of Martin Gortat and Mikael Pietrus. At the 7:30 mark, LeBron James was able to get Dwight Howard's third, and Magic Fan shows his Outer Redneck with a LeBron Sucks serenade; the makes cut the lead to 29-25, and allow Mike Brown to try to get Z Ilgauskas some comfortable minutes. Mo Williams hit a three to cut the lead back to a point, and a James make gave them their first lead with 5:44 left.

Orlando Fan sounds like he's not alone in the Amway Arena, which given their curious ticket distribution pattern (if you want to buy two tickets, you have to buy ten and find buyers for the other eight -- thank you, Dirty Davey, for that) isn't too surprising...

Anthony Johnson assaults Mo Williams with an elbow, and almost gets tossed with Flagrant Two, but since Williams is able to return despite looking like he's been in a street fight. Ball karma demands Johnson miss his free throws and WIlliams makes his, and that's exactly what happens; the Cavs then led by three. James went serpentine through the Magic to push the lead to five, and the Cavs have that Pissed Off Road Team feel to them right now. The Magic went cold in the second, and part of this is simply that the Cavs stopped turning it over. The game got chippy/slow with free throws. James let Pietrus go by for a layup, then took the inbounds and immediately counterattacked to get a Rashard Lewis foul, and that's an even or better trade. Sideshow Vareajo wants to guard Lewis, but want and can are two different things. James falls and still controls the ball; the possession ended with another Z miss, but still, holy crap. A Lewis slam cut the lead to one and provoked a Mike Brown timeout. Despite the game not being much on the eyes, it's still tight and clearly leading to something good... and if I were a Cav fan, I'd be a little bent at not being able to get more of a lead with Howard on the bench.

Craig Sager reported that Williams received four stitches from Johnson, and I wouldn't be surprised if it winds up helping him. Z couldn't finish at the rim because that's what happens when you are a finesse 7-footer. James continued to hit from the free throw line as TNT fitted Hedo Turkoglu for goat horns. James had 18 as Boobie Gibson actually gets on the floor; the man who owned Chauncey Billups in 2007 as a rook now isn't even in the rotation. Funny game, basketball. Gortat blocked James twice in the first half, both times kind of amazing. Gibson missed a three with no one within ten feet of him. James goaltends Gortat to give the Magic another lead, and LeBron airballs the three from the corner, then Gortat got to the line with 2.8 left in the quarter, an end game that clearly went to the home team, at least until the big man missed both free throws. Williams misses the three-quarter court heave, and the half ended with the Magic up by a point, 42-41. But of a grind of a game, with only two Cavs (James and Williams) able to do much; neither team can feel too good about their standing right now.

The third started with more Cleveland weaver work, but it didn't end with a make. Howard with his fresh legs burned Z for a super-easy make and old-school three. Vareajo knocked down two on an Alston foul, ans the Cavs have outperformed the Magic at the line. Lee made a corkscrew jumper to push it back to four. James took a head shot from the Turk to bail him out, and Magic Fan is outraged by an obvious call; not exactly covering themselves in basketball IQ there. After a team board on the second make, Orlando Fan really sang hard, just in time to see James make another and give the Cavs a lead. By my count, the madder the Magic's fans get, the better the Cavs played....

Howard collected another down low and made both free throws to change the lead again. James can't buy a jumper tonight, and Howard's half hook converts. James missed his 11th jumper of the night, a three pointer that hit every part of the rim and stayed out, and Lee drops the corner three for an instant 8-0 run, seven point lead, and Cleveland timeout. I realize that every NBA conference final has to go to the wire this year, but with James not hitting anything from outside, I'm wondering exactly how.

Lee steals and slams as Magic Fan sensed blood in the water. A Z miss is followed by Howard getting subdued under the rim, but it wasn't a shooting foul, and James then got to the rim after a miss, picked up Lee's third, and made both to stop the bleeding and cut it to six. Alston fed Howard for a slam, and the big man now had 15 points in 14 minutes. A Williams three answers to five, and Howard got an ofensive board, then punctuates it with an elbow that could have gotten him tossed, had it found a body. The Cavs reacted to it as it were a smoking gun in the parlor, which tells you just how much they are dreaming of Howard not being on the floor. Vareajo sits after a bad foul, and Alston pushed it to seven. Mike Brown puts in Ben Wallace, who is just an embarrassment at this point on offense. James couldn't make another jumper, but the o-board led to an alley-oop slam that sucked the air out of the building, and while the Cavs really weren't the best team on the floor so far, they were still freaking dangerous. The Turk got to the line from a Smith foul and made both. Williams missed from the corner, and while James still hasn't made a jump shot tonight, the Magic are still collapsing on him, giving up open looks to the supporting cast. Wallace is called for a foul on Howard, who cans one, and I guess Wallace still has a use for that. A West make brings it back to six, but Wallace's third is a block on Alston, and ye gads, Ben Wallace Is Terrible. Two Alston makes, and it was 8 again until West answered.

Smith picked Pietrus, then missed; a Wallace o-board led to another West miss, and as we go to commerce, Howard picked up his fourth on a push. Big moment there, as the crowd goes quiet all of a sudden, and compounded the error with a tech, his fifth of the playoffs, but Williams missed it. Howard is just two techs away from sitting, which could be a very big deal later. Worth watching.

West missed and Gortat with the board, but Smith erased Alston, and James feeds Wallace for a slam to cut it to four. James ripped Lewis, but Smith missed the open jumper. Cavs looked much more together with Howard on the bench and Alston missing forced jumpers, but good Magic defense led to Pietrus getting a turnover layup and old-school three; just an immense play in the flow of the game there, and the lead was seven again. Williams tried to do too much and blew the two-for-one possession, as the Cavs did bad things on the end of quarter again. Pietrus traveled baldly for the second time tonight, and the quarter ended with James scoring on a typically brilliant drive. At the end of three, it was Magic 68, Cavs 63.

Z tries to exploit Gortat, but it went the other way, and the teams combine to go 1 for their first 11 in the quarter. Yeesh. West got a call and a make to cut it to six, and with 9:28 left, Stan van Ron Jeremy Gundy gets antsy enough to put Howard back in. The fact that the Cavs are in a game at all while shooting 36% from the floor on the road is kind of amazing. Pietrus made two off a penetration drive, and it was eight again. A Z jumper actually goes down to cut it to six. Lewis drained a three off good ball movement, and that could be a dagger, especially after Mo Williams is whistled for a moving pick. With 8:19 left and commerce happening, it's a 9-point Magic lead and a growing sense that this one might not have last second drama, if only because I'm not sure the Cavs can score enough points to close this lead.

Z stopped Howard down low, and James bulls to the line for instant offense. but only one make. West's fourth foul got the Magic closer to the penalty. Pietrus missed from the corner, and West doesn't; just that fast, it was 75-70, but West got his fifth right after, and since that means Sasha Pavlovic has to come in, not a plus. Pietrus penetrated and finished, rather than take the corner three. James starting to feel it, and just bounced Howard away on a drive and make; wow. After a Magic turnover, James fed Z for a distance miss; Vareajo got the board and a Lewis foul. James missed another three that could have dropped, and the Turk answered with a drive to the line on the Pavlo Virus. Two Turk makes pushes it to seven halfway through the fourth.

Williams with a quality make off the dribble. The Turk might have gotten away with a walk on his driving miss, but Howard collects the board and went to the line, but only after five minutes of Tyler Perry Et Al. These Gatorade ads with Kevin Garnett are a lot easier to take this year!

Two big Howard makes pushed it to seven, and the Cavs haven't profited from putting him on the line tonight. Z avoids an obvious traveling call to draw a foul on Tony Battie, then makes both to get it back to five. Howard gets it down low and powers through a James block attempt to get to the line. A lucky roll on the first was followed by a miss, and we're at six. James draws a 50/50 blocking foul on Pietrus, and ball karma forces two bad misses. On the second, Sideshow Vareajo picks up his fifth and doesn't draw a Howard technical, and I can only imagine that was his intention on that play. With 4:40 left, Howard rams the first free throw in, and the second as well. The lead ws 8 with 4:40 left, and Howard was 11 of 15 from the line.

James finally gets a three to fall, and hmm... but Alston gets it right back in the corner. James airballs a three to Vareajo for an easy lay up. The Turk realized it was the fourth quarter, so he hits. Williams with a bad miss, but Lewis can't hit the killshot three. Pietrus put James on the line with 3:03 left and the Magic holding an 8-point lead; two James makes cut it to six. Vareajo takes his sixth with speed, rather than spend any more time in the presence of Mr. Howard. After commerce, Howard missed the first as TNT wonders about intentional fouls, and hits the second. The lead was 7 with 2:40 left.

James drives the lane, scores, and gets Howard's fifth foul. Holy diver. Old-school three cuts it to 4, and LeBron suddenly has 38. Z sends Howard back to the line with his fifth, and the real problem with fouling Howard at this point is that I'm not sure they'lll have enough guys to do it. It's especially ineffective when Howard makes both, as he did here. Howard with 24 points in 25 minutes. James missed the three but get the board, and Pietrus gets called for a blocking foul with 2:01 left for instant offense as van Gundy throws a rod. Karma misses, and it's six again. Alston's killshot three does not go. Williams boards, then James turns on loose interior passing to Z. The Turk runs clock and misses from the arc, but Pietrus gets the o-board that will more or less end this one, and West adds dumb to bad with a technical. Z fouls out stopping Pietrus, and the Magic are 68 seconds away.

TNT notes that there were 77 combined free throws so far tonight, and I can't say that I haven't noticed. Smith replaced Z as Lewis blows the tech. Pietrus is also not a good free throw shooter, but these two go down smooth, and it's eight and almost done. Pavlovic misses from three, and that makes them 5 of 23 from the arc, 39% from the field in total. The Magic run clock with the Turk missing. James gets Howard's sixth on a bad call from the refs, and he barely avoids the crippling technical on his way out of the game. With 36.1 seconds left, there still should be no way the Cavs escape with a win, but Howard can still eject himself from a future playoff game...

James was 5 of 10 from the line before the three attempts; after three makes, it's 8 for 13, and he now has 41 points for the night, only five of them on jump shots. Wow. Lewis makes just one, but the Cavs miss two three-point attempts, and that's that, really; what might have been a three-point game turns into eight after two Turk makes. James is blocked by Pietrus at the rim to punctuate things, and his free throw makes push the final score out. Magic 99, Cavs 89.

If you want to look at this from a Cavs perspective, they were in a game where they could not buy a jump shot from anyone. If you want to look at this realistically, they are a James miracle in Game Two from being down 3-0. Considering that the Magic were also down big in the first two games of this series, and... well, I'll be honest, I have no idea what to make of this series so far. But Orlando has the lead, the home court, the momentum, a 10-4 record against these Cavs, and a chance to put a hammerlock on this with a Game 4 win.

They also have Howard getting much less mileage than James; if James is losing his legs on jumpers from fatigue, which is very possible given how much effort he's had to put out in these first three games, the Cavs are done. I still think the Cavs are going to win this series, but you've got to give it up for this Magic team, who have lost multiple buzzer-beaters in the playoffs with no carryover from game to game. Give credit where due.

The Yankees Are Hospitable Hosts

I had the Phillies-Yankees game on this afternoon while doing the laundry, and I have to congratulate the Yanks for being so accommodating to the visiting team. After years of a huge and unfair home field advantage, complete with ghosts and full-throated partisans and wall-to-wall Yankee Fans, the most valued franchise in baseball has, in one fell swoop, made the playing field much more level. With acres of empty seats in the close areas, a permanent tourist mindset from the overpriced everything, and the sense from non-locals that they need to see the new yard, you've never heard so many fans happy to see the home team lose... which they did today, to the immortal Carlos Ruiz and Clay Condrey, to drop their series with the Fightin's.

In many ways, it just makes things like the Yankee road games, where they have any number of road fans ruining the experience for the local faithful, and helps us get to that perfect moment for MLB -- a post-modern age where every person in attendance is more or less neutral in their rooting interests, maybe because they're all fantasy sports players and/or corporate greedheads who are too well-heeled to applaud. It's certainly making life easier for the Phillies, who are below .500 at home and far above that on the road. If they could ever get their home and closer problem (Brad Lidge blew his second save of the series today, has an ERA of over 9, and just looks snakebit) dealt with, they could be, you know, good or something.

But in any event, continued thanks to the Yanks for replacing their perfectly acceptable, massive home-field advantage with a massive boondoggle that will, over time, destroy their pitching and retard their player development and talent evaluation. (Oh, and what a fair home run for Mark Teixeria today, who went deep to left when his bat broke all the way into the outfield.) Good work, gents!

Lakers-Nuggets Game Three: Kobe Bryant Has His Way In Colorado (Again)

Tonight in Colorado, Kobe Bryant willed the Lakers to the series lead, with a flat-out dominating performance, especially late. The game was also notable for the continued late-game failures of the Nuggets, which is to say, the Nuggets remain coached by George Karl. If I could double up my wager on Lakers in seven now, I would. And now, the micro-blog.

In the first quarter, Carmelo Anthony made the short-term case that he's the best player on the floor by getting to the line for eight free throws, leading to 14 points. The Lakers started 4 of 10 from the line, and Nene outplayed Andrew Bynum, but the Lakers got close at the end of the quarter on makes by Jordan Farmer and Lamar Odom, and it was 28-26 Nuggets after one. Closing out quarters has been a consistent problem for the Nuggets, and a consistent win for the Lakers; had they made their free throws, they'd be ahead.

In the second, the Nuggets get some early separation as Melo continued to drive the action with boards, an assist and steals; the latter is 3 in the first 14 minutes of action, which shows you just how D'd up he is for this playoff. (Melo, for his career, is a steal per game kind of guy, which isn't all that impressive given his big minutes.) Chris Anderson continued to be one of the best values in the Association this year, and I'm more of a fan of his for Sixth Man of the Year than I am Jason Terry. The Lake Show closed the gap with Melo on the bench, with Kobe Bryant making back to back shots to tie it at 39-all.

After a timeout, the Nuggets ran off five in a row, but a Kenyon Martin miss -- his fifth against zero makes -- followed a Pau Gasol dunk, and Bryant drew a Melo foul -- and that became meaningful later. Denver stretched the lead to 8 on good ball movement, but the Lakers ended the quarter positively with an Ariza three and a Bryant make on a Kleiza technical At the half, it was Denver 52, LA 48.

In the third, the Lakers tied it up in a blink with Bynum and Bryant. Dahntay Jones then had his best sequence of the series with a foul draw on Bryant, two makes and a nice lay up, forcing one of those Coach Phil Jackson is Actually Paying Attention Tonight timeouts. The way that Jackson has managed his timeouts in this series, as opposed to the Rocket one, tells you all you need to know about his confidence level.

Out of the timeout, Bryant had all day to measure and make from the arc. Melo got blocked at the rim by Bynum, forcing a turnover; it's his third block and a big play. The game got really grindy, with both teams jawing at the refs, and Nugget Fan sangs the Bull S*** Song. The Nugs contested everything on defense as Ariza got worked on the sidelines; he would return and be huge. Jones shoved Bryant in the back on a layup, and Bryant's refusal to sell the foul kept it from being a flagrant; since Kobe's had his complement of technicals this year, he held his tongue.

Melo then worked Walton like a speed bag, feeding Martin down low for a dunk. After a steal, the game turned into rugby with multiple floor burns, ending in a jump ball from the blown fast break. The game got increasingly chippy, and Fisher picked up a technical after some back and forth with Martin, with Billups missing the free throw to make up for the bad karma of Martin also not getting whistled. Nugget Fan really getting loud here. Jones drove and scored over Gasol, very impressive, to make the lead six.

Perhaps the biggest hidden play of the game happened with Walton selling Anthony's fourth foul; Melo hooked Walton to get to the rim, and Walton sold the elbow enough for get the call, and it's the right call, but it's also one that isn't always whistled, particularly at home. Walton then fed Bryant for a slam at the cup, and that's also Jones' fourth foul; the old school three tied it up, and that erased the Nuggets 7-point lead for the quarter. As Ariza went to the locker room, the refs hurt the flow some more, and a Billups make gave the Nuggets the lead again.

Bryant got Martin one-on-one, and that's a matchup the Lakers must love, but Bryant settled for the jumper and misses. Walton earns another possession by taking the charge from J.R. Smith. Anderson can't handle Gasol down low, but the big man misses another free throw, LA's 11th of the night. Smith can't get a call on Vujacic at the arc, but the refs make up for the non-call by giving the Nuggets possession, and Billups took advantage with a three; this is clearly the most officiated game of the series, and that's not a compliment. Bryant knew what kind of game this is, and picked up Martin's fourth with a chunky leaner.

Smith with a three from Billups at the buzzer, and the refs got Anthony Carter for a Vujacic flop; wow, the refs are just terrible tonight, and for the road team. Karma demands a Machine miss, which is followed by a Bryant airball from three. Nugget Fan was wild loud as the Nuggets got multiple offensive rebounds, finished by an Anderson putback. Vujacic stopped the bleeding with a three that Billups got right back; great back and forth here. Vujacic feeling it and missed, and at the end of the quarter Smith makes a huge three out of a bad Billups pass, and marks the occasion with a stupid taunting technical at Vujacic as Carter tried to get him away. Unreal talent, unreal knucklehead, unreal play, and unreal officiating. I've watched a lot of hoop in my life, and I don't think I've ever seen a guy like Smith; he makes Stephen Jackson look sane. For once, the Nuggets own the end of quarter, and it was 79-71 with twelve minutes to go. The biggest point about the surge is that it buys time for Anthony to stay on the bench, because no one believes this is going to be decided before the final minutes.

In the Lemur interview, George Karl noted how his team lost composure in the third. And to think, some people wonder about George. Bryant made the taunting tech to cut it to 7. Vujacic continued his bad play with a moron reach in. Smith went again from the arc and missed; only in Denver can a guy who is 2 for 9 take a heat check. Odom owned Anderson down low for an easy one. Kleiza missed a tough shot in transition, and here come the Lakers again, but Anderson made a great weak-side block. Billups misses the transition three, and the Nuggets are 4 for 21 now. Farmer travels on defensive pressure, then compounds the error with a stupid tech that could have got him tossed. Wow, these teams aren't playing smart. Billups makes that one, then watches Anderson miss in traffic; the Lakers turn, but Smith couldn't take advantage, and Carter got the whistle on Gasol down low. Anthony returned with 9:26 left as Karl tries to get the game to stop being so ugly; he was joined by Nene. Good Laker ball movement ends with a Gasol dunk. Nene can't score over Gasol, but he can pick up his fifth foul, and that's a problem all over, as Gasol is starting to make his presence felt. The Nuggets needed Anthony to take the game over, and it just didn't happen.

Gasol drew Anderson's second on another touch call. After two makes, it was a 2-point game, and that's another one for the Conspiracy File. Lakers D up hard and forced a wild Martin miss; that's now 0 for 8 for the quarter. A messy Laker possession is ended with Anderson pulling the chair on Gasol; at the other end, the Birdman blows it at the rim, pouted at the refs, and watched as the Lakers took the lead on an Ariza three. The Nuggets are really showing their knucklehead weakness tonight. Anthony finally got to the line, but only makes one to tie it back up. Bryant scored over Smith, then Smith got it back with a great pass to Martin for the flush. Gasol couldn't finish over Anderson, and Billuips is stopped at the rim, but Martin followed for the lead lay up. Big crowd noise again from the Denver faithful, and you can't ask for more from them. Halfway through the fourth as we went to commerce, it was a 2-point Nugget lead.

The Lemur cameras follow up on Coach Philip abusing Odom in the timeout, but he didn't remove him. Smith got away with touching Bryant on a three, who missed, but the Lakers get the team board. An awkward drive and dish by Ariza finds him again in the corner for the three-ball make. Anthony couldn't get a call on a drive, but the Nuggets get the team board, and Billups hit a corner three on the inbounds, drawing Bryant's fourth foul, and he makes for the three-point lead and Kobe Frustration. Billups was the Nuggets best player this half. Gaosl with an easy make down low, and Anthony's nightmare half continued with a miss. Nene guarded Gasol perfectly to no avail, and the Lakers took the lead back, 90-89, with 3:45 left. Fisher then does the same thing to Smith, and the Nuggets lead. Bryant drives on Anthony, collects the foul on Smith, and goes for the old-school three, but that's the 12th Laker miss from the stripe. Billups missed the three, and Fisher has to call time on the ground. We went to commerce with 2:46 left, and yet another classic game on tap. It's every night this year in the Association, this insane drama...

Smith D's Bryant nicely, and he missed late in the clock. Ariza got his fourth away from the ball on Anthony, and he takes the easy points to give the Nuggets the lead back. 2:15 left. Fisher gets to the rim, but Nene is there first, and the charge call keeps him on the floor and gives the Nuggets the ball. Good ball movement by the Nuggets ends in a Smith miss from the arc, and Martin took an over the top on Odom, sending him to the line. Odom made the first and missed the second to tie it back up. Smith made a great drive and pull up, owning Fisher; 2 point lead, but Kobe Bryant Does Not Care, and his jaw-dropping three changes the lead again. Billups to the rack to Martin, but he couldn't finish, and Jackson called time with 46.4 left and a 1-point lead. Bryant, I think, has had quite enough of the doubts that he isn't the best player in this series.

Bryant to the baseline to draw Smith's fourth foul; no chance for the defender on that. Just one make from the Mamba makes us all wonder if the Lakers are just going to miss too many free throws to win this game; it's a 2-point Lake Show lead with 37.1 seconds left. Martin can't inbound before five seconds are up, and Nugget Fan is having nightmare memories of Game One; and it happens *again*, with Ariza collecting the tip from Odom. Anthony has to take his sixth to prevent the game ender, but Ariza makes that moot with two makes. 99-95 with 35 seconds left. Billups overdribbles and got bailed out by Odom. Billups makes two to keep it in doubt, but the Lakers can actually execute an inbounds pass, and Martin sent Bryant to the line; that was the end of his night as well. With Nugget Fan raining down the hate, Bryant made both. Billups got nothing but air from 35 feet, and Jones put Bryant on the line with violence as Nugget Fan starts leaving. Courtisde mics pick up some ugliness as the Mamba makes it a six point lead. The game ends on Nugget misses.

Pretty great game, despite the over officiating, and that's the first loss at home for Denver in their past 16 games. I can't shake the feeling that the Nuggets actually have a better team here -- the Lakers needed every ounce from Bryant tonight, who had 41 and looked visibly spent for perhaps the first time in his NBA career, as he was bent over double during his Lemur post-game interview -- but when you have George Karl as your coach, you are going to blow big games late with things like taunting technicals and failed inbounds passes. Yeesh.

Lakers 2, Nuggets 1, and if you don't think this series is going long -- Game Four will see a referee free throw correction, I'm sure -- I've got a bridge to sell you.

Oh, and here's a final fun fact for Nugget Fan: Coach Philip is 49-1 in series when he's up after three games. The lesson: you get him early, or you don't get him at all.

Cavs-Magic Game Two: 48 Minutes To A Miracle

The best playoff year ever for the Association continued tonight in Cleveland. I can't state this enough: for sheer night-in night-out amazement, this year is taking a back seat to no sport and no year. But I'm going to take you there with the usual hyper-detailed micro blog, because it deserves it. Every single minute of it.

For the second straight game, the Cavs jumped out to a big early lead -- 15-5 after the first five minutes, and 30-16 at the end of the first -- but unlike last night's game, it's wasn't all LeBron James, and the ball movement was terrific. Midway through the second quarter, the lead was 23, and it looked like the Magic were just going to be happy to go home with a split.

But then the Magic do what they do -- namely, start making threes -- and while Hedo Turkoglu and Rashard Lewis combined to start 2 for 11, they finished 15 for 32. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

With 3:44 left in the second quarter, the Turk got a steal off James, and Delonte West refused to give him a shot at the old school three; even better, the refs didn't give up the flagrant call, showing that there wasn't going to be undue ref involvement to ruin this one. Cavs Fan liked that play a little too much; had this game been in Philly, I'm sure the national media would comment. A slam from LeBron showed the continued good ball movement, but the Magic were shooting better now, and the lead shrank to 14 before commercial.

The Magic then answered one of those Utter Devastation drive and dunks by James with a calm Lewis triple. Another ridiculous make for James was matched by a JJ Redick runner, and the Cavs' defense was starting to fail just like Game One. After a rare Magic miss, James went to the rim again and gets the call, and he's going so good then, he was even making every free throw. The Turk connected with high difficulty over the remains of Ben Wallace. James finally missed a free throw, and at the buzzer, Sasha Pavlovic gets the steal but no call, and that's it.

Now, please note that all of that was just the end of the freaking second quarter. At the half, it was Cavs 56, Magic 44.

TNT -- who, I have to say, I greatly prefer to the World Wide Lemur -- showed Stan van Ron Jeremy Gundy going back to his I Hate My Team routine that is going to cause him to wear our his welcomed in another 2-3 years, but it's working for now, and for the most part, I hated his team in the first half tonight, too.

The first possession of the second half was that old-school Cavs defense, and the fact that the home crowd didn't pick up on it showed just how much nerves they had. An absurd James three, followed by Z stopping Howard one on one, still doesn't quite get them loud as the lead went to 14. A bad Alston miss and a nice pick and roll for a James jumper got them a little more enthused, but a miss trade later, it was Howard at the rim with ease, and a miss later, the Turk abused West to bring it back to 12. The crowd had no confidence that this could end early, and they were right.

Sideshow Anderson made a tough reverse, but the Turk was driving easy to the bucket, and we're back to trade bucket mode, with the next swap being Mo Williams for Courtney Lee. And then Lewis made back to back threes, and in a blink, it was a 14-4 Magic run.

Coming out of the timeout, James went for yet another old-school three, but missed the free throw. I can't tell you, really, how good he is right now. Lewis missed a three badly, and Sideshow followed with an ugly dribble and bank. Rather than get discouraged by lucky offense, the Magic just rain down another three. That's got to be discouraging. James broke the line and got blocked, but recovered and drew Howard's third foul on another old-school three. Alston misses, but runs down Williams for a turnover; and on the trip back, Z and Williams stop Howard at the rim, with Mo calling time on the floor. The Cavs led this game by 10, but it might have been the least comfortable ten they've led by all year.

Midway through the third, Williams didn't want the three, and his runner wasn't any better. Lewis missed a corner three, the kind of shot he normally buries. The Turk picked up an odd loose ball foul, his third, the kind of play that's rarely called even if correct, but the fact that this was the most curious ref decision of the night tells you what kind of game they called. James only got off the floor to get his leg worked on, the same one that got banged in Game One, proving nothing other than that he bleeds like a normal man; as soon as he returned, he just went to the rim like normal. Rather than have any moment of hesitation, Lewis just scored. Howard picked up his fourth defending an alley oop, and with 2:22 left in the third, the Cavs still had that 10 point lead, and maybe a little better feeling with the Magic center looking bench-bound.

Here's the problem with that hope: while it's never a bad thing to get Howard on the pine, it's not like any of the Magic opponents have been able to take advantage. The Magic won Game Six in Philadelphia without Howard; when he's been on the pine, Gortat has played well. They might even move the ball better.

Joe Smith took his fourth foul on Lewis behind the arc, and Lewis reacted to the tap was as if he was shot. Despite the bad free throw karma, Lewis drains all three to make it a 9 point game. The Cavs turned it carelessly on their usual top of the key weave, and Smith got his fifth away from the ball, forcing James to guard Lewis... which just means the Magic use the Turk to hit the three instead, cutting it to six. A bad Cavs possession ended with a long three miss. The Turk missed, but the Cavs couldn't shoot in transition, and Pavlovic ended it by missing from the arc. A Lee runner is waved off as Ben Wallace is able to get the block call; huge stop for the Cavs there. The quarter ends with a flat and short three from James, and that's a 25-19 third quarter for the Magic, who are awfully close to taking a hammerlock on this thing. Yes, I'm amazed. Cavs 75, Magic 69.

Mike Brown notes that his team is having problems with the pick and roll. No, really? And to think, some people wonder about him. A James drive got nothing, and Pietrus fed Gortat at the rim for a stuff; it's a four point game. West answered, and Anthony Johnson sent James to the line as Gortat got crushed. Two makes pushes it to 8, but Gortat converted an ugly finish at the rim. James fed Pavlovic, who gets to the rim and scores over Gortat, who added a potentially justified technical for a blocking call when he was outside the arc. With just one make - Pavlovic has some ridiculous issues at the line -- the lead was nine again.

Pavlovic took a wrestling foul on Lewis on pick and roll coverage. Howard replaces Gortat, and the Turk drove and scored in his Mr. Fourth Quarter way. The Cavs moved the ball well, but they were also antsy about pulling the trigger, and it resulted in a Pavlovic air ball. Courtney Lee got a call and made both to trim the lead to five, the closest it had been since the first quarter. James turned it with a charge as Anthony Johnson got a little lucky; the refs then hit Turk with a make-up turnover. The Cavs continued their tense fourth with a James miss from bad distance, answered by a tough running miss from Lee. James then turned it on a bald charge on Michael Pietrus, who really should get more floor time for the Magic, and just to back that sentiment up, Pietrus drained a three over Vareajo to cut it to two. Vareajo compounded the error with a bad turnover. At the seven minute mark, Lee finally tied it on an easy drive, and wow, wow, wow.

James took the mantle and scored on a drive. Lewis owned West to tie it back up. The 11-2 Magic run had Cleveland Fan ready to tie off. TNT informed us that the Magic are 44-11 when they make nine or more threes, as they had at that point. James missed, got the board and fed West, who also missed from the arc. On the Magic's first attempt to get the lead, they converted -- first one tonight. Williams then refused the goat horns he had been modeling with a huge make to tie it back on a possession where the Cavs look diseased. The Magic turn it as Williams goes to the floor, and Lewis got a shot to the face for his blocking foul trouble. Williams then made a huge three off a James dish, and Cleveland Fan is alive with a three point lead.

The Turk, at this point, simply did not care, and scored on his usual easy fourth quarter drive. Z, of all people, hit a top of the key jumper off a James drive, and the Cavs looked like a basketball team again. The Turk picked up an offensive foul, his fifth, as he nailed Sideshow Vareajo, who sold an actual call for once. Cleveland turned it, but Lee missed. James fed Williams for a wide open three, but he isn't that big of a hero, and you know the game means everything when the 7-foot Z with the four-times surgery legs are hitting the floor and calling time.

After the time out, Z missed an open three, one of those shots that you have to be happy to see if you are one of those theoretical Magic fans. Pietrus converted a runner over a Cavs quasi-trap, but it was answered by Williams with a nice running make. Lewis missed an open three as Vareajo hit the floor. James tried to get to the rim for a killing spike, but Pietrus fouled him en route, and the Magic weren't in the penalty yet. James drove with no call, and the Magic responded with good ball movement and an ice-cold Turk three to tie it again. Good heavens, the Turk is just an assassin.

James called for a travel with 30.9 left, a call that even he admitted to after the game. The Magic were a make and a stop away from a 2-0 series lead that would just stun on every level. I can't imagine how awful Cavs Fan felt, but from the crowd noise, there wasn't a single man alive who believed.

The Cavs had a foul to give, and Pavlovic gave it with 13.6 left on a Turk drive. A bit of a cheap call, and it gave the Magic the shot at holding for the last shot and win. The arena had a clock malfunction just to prolong Cavs Fan Agony, and James needed more work on his leg. Just agonizing; I think if I were a Cavs fan, the temptation to leave would have been huge.

On the inbounds from Lewis, James does not pressure it for some reason. I get that you need to keep an eye on the inbounds passer, and Lewis is too tall to really pressure there... but still, harass the man. Instead, he gets it to the Turk easily, and he converted an awkward half-drive and high arcing jump shot over Pavlovic -- not James -- with a second left. Immediately afterward, TNT cut to a reaction shot of a small boy in a Cavs jersey that was just awful, child abuse, really. In my notes, I wrote, "Absent a miracle, the Magic will be up 2-0 with home court."

And then a miracle happened.

Williams inbounded from half court to James. Having watched the replay a dozen times, the striking thing is how no other Cavs players seems to have hope.

Only James was moving hard.

Only James had any sense of still winning this game.

Only James could drive the Turk to the paint as if he was going for a lob, then get separation for the catch behind the arc.

And only James could rise and can it from 25 feet for the absolute single-out suck-out win.

Cavs 96, Magic 95.

Somewhere, Craig Ehlo is smiling -- crying, perhaps -- because he's off the hook now.

And that, folks, was just Game Two.

205 Drop: Top 12 sports figures that I can't explain to my kid

The link today was a lot of work and something I'm fairly proud of, so go click. Besides, it's got a severely outdated picture of my eldest kid on it, so if you don't like it and click on it a lot, you must hate my kid. How could you?

Lakers-Nuggets Game Two, Second Half: That Only Took 24 Years

Before the start of Game Two, ex-Lakers GM Jerry West made some small waves by talking about how, in his opinion, LeBron James was now a better player than Kobe Bryant. Bryant didn't give the story any extra air, because Bryant is a savvy veteran, but the Laker faithful were less than thrilled. But no matter what, the conversation of Who Es Muy Macho is a James-Bryant affair, with Dwayne Wade fans more or less keeping quiet after the Heat's first round loss to the Hawks.

But no one, outside of maybe upstate New York and the state of Colorado, really thought that the Lakers didn't have the best player on the floor in this series. And... just maybe... they don't.

At least, they didn't in the first two games of the series.

In the third, Carmelo Anthony continued to press the issue on both ends, guarding Bryant on defense in a way that he, frankly, has not seen fit to at any point in his professional career prior to this year. He was physical (much more than Kobe, mostly because he's a half-dozen years and untold numbers of NBA games younger), dogged, able to use his star status to not get called for the kind of ticky-tack fouls that a lesser player would. And when paired with the similar determination of Chauncey Billups (30 free throw attempts between the two of them tonight), you've got something.

The teams played an even-money third quarter that got them to crunch time despite Trevor Ariza's best offense of the playoffs, punctuated by one of those athletic dunk drives that make scouts drool... and then followed up by a scary fall on another drive. Yikes. The play lost flow late with nothing but free throws in the last two minutes, but the game was tight enough that this didn't matter overly much to The Drama, and at the end of the third, it was Lakers 81, Nuggets 80.

The fourth opened with another Linus Kleiza three off of a Melo dish,. Kleiza's fourth make from distance of the night, but his last very good moment of the game. Not to overstate Kleiza's importance in this game, but his 16 and 8 were 80% of their bench points and 50% of their bench boards, and gave the Nuggets a hailing distance performance to the Lakers bench on the road (22 to 21 for the home team in points). More importantly, it let the Nugs overcome 35 minutes of meh from their shooting guards (5 points on 2 of 10 shooting from Dahntay "4 personals in the first six minutes" Jones and J.R. Smith), because with Kleiza in, they simply moved Melo to the 2 on defense against Bryant, and the 3 on offense with Kleiza floating to the perimeter.

Two more Melo makes pushed the lead to 7 with 9 minutes left, and with the Lake crowd getting officially nervous, Bryant nailed a three to bring them back. With 8:18 left, Luke Walton got a whistle on Melo that made him sit, but unfortunately for the Lake Show, it had more to do with George Karl trying to get his star some air, rather than actual foul trouble. In the next minute that Melo watched, Shannon Brown makes a three as part of Phil Jackson's continual craps roll at the point to bring it back to a 1-pint game., and after Kleiza fouls Odom, Melo returns in time to watch the Lakers take back the lead at the line. It wasn't quite as dubious as putting an ice-cold Anthony Carter in the game to inbounds the ball at the end of Game 1, but for people looking for Karl to blow the game for the Nuggets, that's the kind of small moment that you need to see.

After another Laker o-board, Billups fouls Brown, who makes one of two to make it a two-point game, but missed free throws are never a good sign in a close game. Gasol and Martin get double technicals as the refs threaten to over-officiate the end game. Melo gets to the line on a Walton foul and makes both; it's answered by Gasol getting the whistle on Melo and making both. Martin with a make off a Smith dish ties it back up at 95 with 4:45 left, and we'll go to crunch time all square.

A Nene foul puts Gasol back on the line, but he misses both, and the next trip down, the Brazilian gets to the line on an Odom whistle and gives the visitors the end with two makes. Historically, Nene's not good at the line, but historically, he's also incredibly injury-prone and a terrible contract burden for the Nugs; in other words, screw history. Ariza with a steal and gets to the line, but misses one, and if you're counting at this point, that's five fourth-quarter free throw misses for the home team, against the road team's zero. The teams trade missed opportunities for 80 seconds before Melo gets the make to push it to three points, but Bryant's huge three ties it back up at 99 with two minutes left. Give the devil his due; Bryant just has a sense of the dramatic, and that makes lets them treat the last two minutes as a normal situation, rather than a panic one.

Billups leverages his big game reputation with a foul on Gasol, and his makes give the road team the lead again. Unlike in Game One, Derek Fisher's must-have make stays out with 80 seconds left, and Nene's board runs clock. The possession ends with a Smith turn / Ariza steal, and the fact that the possession didn't end with Billups or Anthony taking the shot is, once again, one of those Furious George crunch-time coaching head scratchers. Bryant's inevitable make ties it back at with 45 seconds left, but the Nugs get a huge play from their bigs, as Nene feeds Martin at the rim for a go-ahead layup. Nice ball movement there for the road team, and I can't help but wonder if all of those free throw misses is going to wind up biting them in the ass.

The Laker time out leads to a questionable possession and a jump ball; Ariza controls the tap but gives back the Game One hero status with a turnover to Nene, and Laker Fan is bent over not getting the call on a procedural violation, because we all know everything about procedural violations on jump balls. Fisher gives up the foul to Billups on a long and dangerous outlet pass, because he has to; the Nuggets point guard makes both, because that is what he generally does in his career. 105-101 with 13 seconds left. The Lakers go down low rather than shoot the desperate three, and Gasol gets the foul from Martin; he has to make both, and does. 105-103 with seven seconds left. The Nugs are able to inbound this time, and Billups finally misses a free throw to keep it a one possession game; aii. The final shot of the game is a Fisher miss on good defensive pressure that could have forced overtime, and that's that. Wow.

Laker Fan is going to moan about the refs after this one, but they shoot jumpers and threes while the Nuggets drive and take contact; they should get more ref love, even for having Thug Martin on the roster. The last time the Nuggets have won a playoff game against the Lakers, it was 1985, so I don't mean to overstate this. Anthony has now scored over 30 (tonight: 34, albeit on 12 of 29 shooting) in five straight games; if and when he has a bad game, Denver will lose, and I'm still feeling very good about my Lakers in seven pick.

But the simple fact of the matter is that for 96 minutes on the floor in LA, the Nugs have been the better team for well over half, and that's with most of their bench players doing the usual playoff fold job. The Lakers are going to need more from people like Andrew Bynum (9 and 2 in 18 meh minutes), and especially from their point guards (a combined 5 for 18 tonight), to get this going back in their direction.

Lakers-Nuggets Game Two, First Half: Where A Late Alarm Clock Happens

One of the reasons why I haven't been a big believer in this Nugget team -- I picked the Bugs to beat them in the first round, and thought the Mavs would last longer, but still lose, in the second -- is that I just couldn't shake the idea that they were, well, the Nuggets. For the first time in the playoffs tonight, that was correct.

And then it wasn't.

The first quarter shows the Nuggets looking more like their team of old -- bad body language, technical fouls, defensive lapses on their own glass and the sense that they weren't really into it. The Lakers also got some pretty bad calls to go their way, and Chauncy Billups continued his bizarre and unexpected trouble at the free throw line. A few threes from bench players made the game closer than it looked, and a Sasha Vujacic miss in transition off a buzzer turnover kept it from seeming worse... but if the vibe of this game doesn't change and soon, the Lakers will win by 20 or more, especially if Carmelo Anthony continues to look ordinary. Lakers 31, Nuggets 23.

The second quarter begins with bench players and a careless Nugget turnover and non-board; the Lakers already have six offensive boards. The game got predictably sloppy with the shock troops, with Vujacic looking particularly inept. Pau Gasol is the best player on the floor during this stretch, but Kleiza makes another three to keep the game close, and then the game gets out of hand with good Laker passing leading to high percentage shooting, utterly flat Denver possessions, and a quick expansion of the lead to 14. There is nothing to recommend the Denver effort so far tonight, and to be honest with you, it's a bit of an effort to stay focused on the game -- if the Nuggets aren't really trying, then why should I really watch?

"How many times have we started off kind of soft and uninvolved?" says Karl to his team... and wow, do you really need to say anything else about why George doesn't have a ring?

'Melo picks it up a bit to get this a little closer, and rattles off 10 points of his own, but the Nug defense is just non-existent right now, so it's just trading points for the most part. In 20 minutes tonight, Kenyon Martin has no rebounds; Melo has all of one on defense... and then Anthony Carter lets a ball go through his hands, and the defense gives up a 50-foot pass to Andrew Bynum, alone under the rim, for the old-school three. I haven't seen this Nugget team in a while; I thought Billups made this team go away?

The Nugs pick it up a bit and another Kleiza three cuts it to 8, and parachute defense on Billups leads to another open 3, and voila -- an 8-0 run that cuts it to 5, despite the fact that that Nugs are still jawing at the stripes every chance they get. Kleiza's game is really what's keeping them in this. Two Billups makes cuts it to 3, and Gasol picks up his second over the back on an o-board attempt, and now it's the Lakers with ref issues. Another Kleiza make cuts it to one, amazingly. Odom makes from 20 on a fairly weak possession. Billups goes to the rack for no call as the Nugs ignore Anthony, and then Billups goes Globetrotter on the inbounds by bouncing it off Bryant's back and getting the layup. That's a 14-2 run to close the half, and Kobe's less than happy in his Lemur-mandated interview. Sadly, they don't ask him about that last confetti bucket play. Lakers 55, Nuggets 54, and it's anyone's game again. Hard to know what to make of this game right now.

205 drop: Top 10 live poker player types

Today's list could have easily gone much larger, but I have to leave something to the vibrant commenting community, don't I? I slay me. (And wonder, in my heart of hearts, if I'll ever get stupid enough about this game to go be a Main Event fish in Vegas for the WSOP. The answer is, of course, no, but not for the reason you think. Unlike say, my fixation on one day going to an Eagles Super Bowl win, the WSOP is an annual event, rather than a once in a lifetime one; the potential for getting that itch every year is way too great. Especially if I somehow cash. Anyway, go click...)

And just because I love you, Dear Reader, almost as much as I love hot lesbians, an extra dose of Jennifer Tilly that's probably NSFW. If she really wants to bluff someone out of a pot, she really should just recite this scene...

Cavs-Magic Game One: The World Changes

With a few minutes left in the first half tonight in Cleveland, the hometown team was ahead by a comfortable margin, with King James putting it in cruise control on his way to 26 first half points. Dwight Howard collected his third foul, and had to sit despite his 8-of-11 start. With two seconds left, the Magic converted a dunk on a feed from Rafer Alston to Marcin Gortat to trim the lead to 12, which means the Magic will have won the second quarter, and at least showed a semblance of a pulse despite a big offensive half for the Cavs.

And then the Cavs inbounded the ball to Mo Williams, who was 3 of 13 at that point. He rose up and converted a contested three pointer. From 67 feet away.

At the half, it was Cavs 63, Magic 48, and honestly? I thought the series was going to end right there. The Magic looked dead, the Cavs looked like there were going for the confetti buckets, and seeing how the first half of Game 1 was supposed to be the Cavs Rust Half, the other 3.5 games weren't going to go any better for them, right?

Well, that's why they play the games. After eight straight games of having the opposition roll over and die for them, the Cavs didn't get that kind of service from the opposition. The Magic won the third quarter hard, with good runouts to open threes, and it became clear that both teams were bringing their "A" games. James was able to pick up Howard's fourth foul with a minute left in the third, but he then missed both free throws, and at the end of the third, only James was playing well for the Cavs. After three, it was Cavs 82, Magic 78, with the road team cutting the lead by 11.

Opening the fourth, the Magic cut further into the lead with Rashard Lewis doing damage and James on the bench for a couple of minutes, and an Anthony Johnson three completed the big comeback with a 7-0 run to start the fourth. A hustle hoop then switched the lead back to the Cavs, and Howard returned with 9:24 left. Orlando missed from distance, and James missed a bad three with no dribbling. Howard to the rim for an alley oop dunk to get the lead back, and again, the Cavs settled for a last-second three and miss. Howard dominates Ilgauskas for another easy one and a three point lead; Z answered from 18 to cut it back to 1.

Howard barely avoids Foul #5 on a screen, but Delonte West misses from distance and the Cavs seem tight. Pietrus misses a three. Another terrible Cavs possession with James waiting too long, then turning it over in the lane. Pietrus gets to the line with the subsequent break and makes one for a 2-point lead. James to Vareajo for a make and the 90-90 tie.

TNT can't show me enough of the cute blonde chick being Dragged To Hell. I'm thinking that Tyler Perry is involved.

Howard called for the travel after a very long ad timeout; 5:33 left now. Better ball movement from the Cavs ends with a Z miss; it's answered by a long Turk 3, and it's Danger Time for the home favorites. Z misses again, but Sideshow Vareajo gets the board. Williams misses a three badly. James picks a Turk lob and gets fouled before he can get the shot off; 4 minutes left, and he gets all the way for the stuff. James now has 43, but it's answered immediately by the Fourth Quarter Turk. Magic still by 3.

James to the left hand, rack and score. Alston misses a three that would have been huge, and Mike Brown calls time with 2:47 left. James misses on a drive, and a Lewis corner three makes it a four point game; the road team is just better right now. Williams forces a corner three and makes it; he was 5 of 17 before then, and remember, one of the five was the halftime heave. 98-97 with 1:57 left as the Turk gets to the line and hits both. Big and easy points there. 100-97 now.

Pietrus giving James trouble on the perimeter, but the MVP is able to corral it and get to the line. Courtney Lee got away with some hardcore harm on Williams; had that been on the ball, the Magic guard might have gotten a flagrant. James' single chink in the armor is free throw shooting, and he misses another to make it a 2-point game. The Cavs have lived on defense, but the Turk gets Vareajo in the air and gets to the line. Cleveland Fan serenades the zebras for the call, but the Turk refuses to heed bad foul call karma, and hits both to make it a 4-point game again; he's now 6 of 6, and when you are trying to steal a road game, gaining points at the line is a very, very big deal.

The Cavs move the ball beautifully and get a Sideshow layup. Pietrus take a quick bad three and misses. James finds West in the corner with a very nice feed, and his three point ball over the Turk gives the home team a lead again. Wow. 103-102 Cavs, 40.8 seconds left. James shows the kind of teammate he is; with 43 points and his teammates giving him nothing, he still makes the pass.

The Cavs need a stop for the win but don't get it; Alston to Lewis for a drained jumper and a one-point lead. The Cavs then make the reasoned decision to have LeBron James, and he goes to the rack, scores a ridiculous runner, and fouls out Howard. Howard just seems amused by the whole thing. Unreal. James completes the old-school three for his new career playoff high (49 now), and with 25.6 seconds left, the Cavs lead 106-104.

Once again, the Cavs need a stop for the win; once again, they don't get it. Lewis to Turk to Lewis who hits an absurd three, and the Magic take the lead back with 14.7 left. So much for the Cavs being able to guard the three. Lewis now has 22 points, and now it's the Magic needing a stop for the win. Eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth, the Magic have shown no fear.

James almost loses the inbounds, then gets to the rim and fires it to the perimeter. West has a clean look but misses, and the play ends with a jump ball scramble on the floor with just a second left. James wins the tip to Williams, who gets a better look than you ever get in this situation, but it stays out, and just that fast, the state of the NBA playoffs have changed. And just to give the NBA powers that be and Cavs Fan additional heart failure, James is gimping on his knee with bad cramping after the buzzer. (He seems fine later.)

Wow, wow, wow. Magic 107, Cavs 106, and Orlando leads the series, 1-0, and I really don't know what to think about this series now. Orlando came from 16 down and confetti bucket time to win. They overcame James shooting 20 for 30 from the field, and shot 7 of 12 from the arc in the second half. They also got absolutely must-have makes twice in the final minute on the road.

If nothing else, I now know this: this series is going long. And just like the West, it's going good. Hell of a year for the Association post-season.

Dirk Dangerously

Far be it for me, really, to disparage another man's choice of poon. I have come back from the happy hunting grounds with less than the legal limit, shall we say. But, really, Dirk Nowitzki... this is what you wind up with, as an All-NBA big man with eight-figure annual salaries?

(If you must dwell, the link takes you to her sobbing jailhouse interviews in which she's pregnant, Dirk knew all about her past and called her "his little jailbird", and the scandalous mess of it all is all due to a vengeful German coach. Um, whatever.)

Sin Eater

I was reading the New Yorker this last week, which is just all kinds of cheery about how the current economy is a whiter shade of ghastly, and something that's going to have fairly permanent and long-reaching effects. (And just when you thought the worst was over, probably because you, personally, aren't unemployed. You unfeeling bastard.)

Anyway, the writer makes the point that part of our problem with the current crisis is that we have no villains to blame. Sure, you can scapegoat Bernie Madoff, or the Detroit auto CEOs, the AIG bonus babies or any number of watchpuppy people in the press and SEC... but none of these people are all that satisfying, and the punishments are far from visceral.

It reminds me of the steroid situation, really.

Even the most disgraced roider -- your Sosas, your McGwires, your Palmeiros, your Bonds, your Clemens, etc., etc. -- is more or less free to enjoy the grotesque amounts of moolah that they made from breaking the rules. Sure, their retirements may not be willing, their legacies might be tarnished, and they might be bitter and unhappy about various aspects of how it ended... but it's not like any of them were doing time in the crossbar hotel with Dog Lovin' Michael Vick and friends.

Maybe this eventually changes if Bonds is held up on perjury charges. Maybe someone famous going to jail and/or having their assets seized really wouldn't make anyone feel or act any differently about steroids.

But then again it might, right? And it might even be a deterrent? I'm not asking for much here, really...

All In...digestion

In a small moment that shows you how the economy is still brutal, consider this: your lead sponsor for the 2008 World Series of Poker was Milwaukee's Best Light. Admittedly, not exactly the brew I'm associating with millions of loose dollars, but on the other hand, it's all good for desperate gambling and soul-crushing defeat.

This year, it's... beef jerky.

No, seriously.

I'm just hoping they make the bracelet winners choke down some celebratory jerky when they get the cashish.

And the last people in American to have money for a brand marketing campaign, please turn out the lights...

205 Drop: Top 10 reasons why David Ortiz is struggling

The list today is one of those small moments where we really can't just kick a man when he's down. For the record, I have nothing against Ortiz, despite the fact that the man has killed me in any number of fantasy leagues, previously with competence, and then last year by being on my roster. But at least I was able to avoid him this year, so we're all good.

Yankee Fan, of course, might feel a little bit differently. (And enjoy the list a bit more.)

Lakers-Nuggets Game One: LA Wire Work

I'd like to say that these teams don't like each other -- and they don't, given how the Lakers have treated the Nuggets as their own personal chew toy for the past few years -- but the real story is that the Nuggets just don't like anyone. The Blazers and Mavericks series have established these guys as basically the Pistons of the West, albeit a Pistons team with a better scoring forward and a much worse coach. Well, OK, not really, but you get what I mean.

In the first half, the Nuggets somehow failed to lead despite shooting 14 points better; credit goes to some abysmal free throw shooting and the Laker bench picking up some threes. It was also notable that the Lakers really only have one shutdown on the ball defender, and that's Kobe Bryant, unfortunately, at least on this night. When they put him on Chauncey Billups, Billups struggled; when they put him on Carmelo, the ex-Orangeman quieted down. I'm not sure how he does that over seven games, but this is the Lakers -- Kobe will take entire games off, especially on the road. They, um, pace themselves well.

At the half, Magic Johnson talked about how he knew Kobe Bryant was going to be good tonight, because of the quality of his pre-game sweat. No, I'm not making this up, and no, Magic didn't tell us how that sweat tasted as he slobbed Kobe's knob. Um, I get that it's your laundry and all, Tragic, but you do realize you were speaking in public, right?

In the third, Melo got it back going again, and you know he's white-hot when the three ball is going, too. The Lakers also had one of those classic brain-dead moments in an inbounds play, where Lamar Odom didn't know that the 8 second clock was shorter than usual. I just don't see how that happens at home. The quarter also saw a 9-0 Lakers run answered by the road team, and it was followed by a Bryant technical, his fifth of the playoffs. I'd be comfortable putting an absurd amount of money on the wager that Kobe will someone not get too many more technicals in this playoff, considering that he's going to start missing games fairly soon if he keeps up the mouth. At this point in his career, Bryant does not drive unless he feels it's well and truly necessary, and he squawks on all contact. Something to keep in mind in a couple of years, especially when you are picking for fantasy. The quarter end with a 2-point Nugs lead.

In the fourth, Kenyon Martin goes out on a possible hand injury, following a collision with Bryant. Billups still isn't shooting all that well, but he is distributing, especially to the Nug Bigs, and Annthony and Bryant match makes as we go to the wire. With 5:30 left, Odom blocked 'Melo, leading to a run out that didn't score despite playing 4-on-5. Martin defends Gasol well, but Billups misses a shot that could have made it 8, and on the trip back, Trevor Ariza hits a wide-open three to make it a 2-point game. A Martin miss is followed by Anderson turning Bryant in the lane, and the hustling Birdman has just been huge for the road team. A Melo O-board and make gives him 39 (!), and the Nugs a 4-point lead with 3:25 left.

After the ads, the Lemur shows how much hand-checking has been going on between Anthony and Bryant; that will be a huge post-game opportunity for Jackson. A Bryant make cuts it to three and gets the crowd back into it. A Gasol block on Nene in tight is huge, and so is the Fisher three from the Kobe pass that makes it a 97-96 lead. Gasol gets the charge call on Anthony, and that's the first Denver turnover of the fourth quarter; it's amazing that they can't turn that into an actual lead. Gasol gets to the line against Martin, who wisely refuses any chance at the continuation play, and he misses both as Nene boards.

Billups over-dribbles and launches a terrible three that's all cotton; wow. 99-97 Nugs with 90 seconds to play. Fisher launches a terrible three with a begging move for contact that the refs ignore, but Gasol gets the board and Nene's sixth foul. After two Gasol makes, the game is tied again with 70 seconds left.

Billups feeds Anderson, who can't make a tough runner; the ball goes to the floor with the bodies for a jump ball between Odom and Anderson with 57 seconds left and 7 on the clock. Odom wins the tip. A Bryant iso leads to a miss, but Billups fails to control the board, and we go to commerce with 35.5 seconds left and the Lakers having possession. Mark Jackson more or less dooms the Nugs by praising Anthony's defense on Bryant on the last possession, because that just means Kobe's going to score to close this, right?

Bryant gets the inbound and draws a dumb strip attempt foul from Martin with 30.5 left, but I'm not sure we can expect great decision-making from a guy with tattooed lipstick marks on his neck. Two makes gives the Lake Show a 101-99 lead and more ads. Denver goes small out of the timeout, and Ariza steals the Anthony Carter inbound; it leads to Bryant getting to the line with 10 seconds left. Bryant makes the throws to make it a two possession game.

You really can't overstate the importance of Ariza's steal here, not that there will be any danger of that in the post-game analysis; it took the home team from a position of vulnerability to one of dominance, and the Nugs have to be damn near perfect just to force overtime. But don't overestimate the importance over Furious George Karl blowing his matchup with Coach Phillip by making an ice-cold guy execute an inbounds play over the length of Lamar Odom; that move was downright Dunleavian.

Martin inbounds to Billups, who steps back and nails the corner three while getting away with stepping out of bounds -- holy crap on many levels. Bryant collects the inbounds and is fouled, and makes two more from the line to make him 9 for 9 for the night. The Lakers foul J.R. Smith rather than let him shoot a three with 3.2 seconds left. He makes the first, then needs to miss the second; he does, but Bryant gets the board, and to add insult to injury, Smith goes down in a heap with an ankle injury at the buzzer.

Just a hell of a game, but in the final analysis, Bryant was just better than Anthony tonight, especially late. Lakers 105, Nuggets 103, and I can't see how this series doesn't go long, but make no mistake -- Denver played a really good game tonight, and still didn't win, mostly from bad decision late, but also from the failure to close out quarters. If Jackson had Denver's personnel, I think Denver moves on. But that ain't how the personnel is allocated.

The Blake Griffin Suicide Watch Begins Now

With the Clippers winning the lottery tonight, they get the first pick in this year's draft -- one hopes they do better with it than, say, Micahel Olowokandi -- and while I don't want to depress any of the fourteen remaining Clip Fans in the world, I'm not seeing how consensus number one pick Blake Griffin is going to fix this mess. Not unless he's able to make Baron Davis younger and/or healthy, give Zach Randolph a heart and brain transfusion, and arrange to have Mike Dunleavy killed and replaced by an actual coach.

Seriously, there is no reason -- none -- to be a Clip Fan. The owner is the worst in the Association, the talent and cap situation is utterly beyond repair, and no ping-pong ball bounce is going to change any of that. As an Association fan, I'm actually bummed that he's going to go to NBA Siberia; he might put up fantasy numbers, but he'll play no games of consequence, and being a Clipper means that his chance of catastrophic injury just went through the roof. But if he's got any kind of sense, he won't sign anything beyond the intro deal, and get the hell out of town as soon as he can.

But hey, Griff, it could've been worse. You could have been going to Sacramento!

The WWE Is Making Nugget Friends

The big story on the Internets on the NBA's off day is that the WWE and the Denver Nuggets have an event conflict for Game Four of the Conference Finals. With over 10,000 tickets already sold for the existing event, this is a relatively simple matter of negotiating between two parties... but that means a cheap PR moment would pass Vince McMahon by, and it's not like he's going to miss that, is he?

"Even though the Denver Nuggets had a strong team this year and were projected to make the playoffs, obviously Nuggets and Pepsi Center owner Stan Kroenke did not have enough faith in his own team to hold the May 25th date for a potential playoff game," said WWE Chairman Vince McMahon.

Considering that this would mean that Kroenke was projecting a team finish that was better than they've finished in decades, and that he would also have to know exactly how the television schedule would fall out... well, um, I'd have given Vince the date, too. After all, the building doesn't pay for itself.

As for what happens next? Well, as much as Blogfrica would love to see some kind of hybrid event, I suspect that the NBA's superior dollars (and the fact that Kroenke owns the building) is going to win the day here. But if Kobe wants to pursue any kind of angle with that girl from Eagle? That's the kind of heat you can't buy, folks...

Blogrolling is an insult to capitalism

Far be it for me to tell Yankee Fan how to spend his money... but, um, good grief. On some level, I'm just in awe of how the team sucks the dollars away from its fan base; it's breathtaking how well they do this.

Are you in the market for a new business card? Let Chicago's history of remarkably stupid criminals be your guide. There's some real creativity here.

MLJ is having issues with the MLB rule book and AJ Pyrzinski. Two great annoyances that annoy together!

Joe Newman is perhaps my most obscure musical hero, and in a better world, he'd be taught in schools. Wildly unpopular proprietors need to stick together.

205 Drop: Top 10 benefits of the Celtics being eliminated

The drop today is all about one of the happiest days of the year for NBA fans: Celtic Elimination Day. We didn't get to celebrate the holiday last year, and it was like one of those Year Without A Santa Rankin & Bass specials we watched as children. Of course, with the Association, a year without a Celtics Elimination Day happens far too often, really...

The Conference Finals Pick

Cleveland vs. Orlando

The case for Cleveland: Home court and the best player in the Association generally means a Finals appearance at least. Reasonably seasoned roster. Tremendous home court advantage this year. Sneaky talented, especially in the bench rotation, where useful parts like Joe Smith, Daniel Gibson and Wally Sczerbiak can do some things. Great defensive team, especially on the perimeter. Solid three point shooters who take advantage of the wide-open spaces that playing with LeBron James generates. It's hard to imagine James not getting the calls in the clutch here.

The case against: They have not been tested for more than a quarter at a time this year in this playoff; it's very possible that there is some paper tiger going on here. Have received too much rest for this time of the year. Head coach Mike Brown has demonstrated his ability to eat paste in crunch time against the Celtics and Spurs. If James ever misses time, gets in foul trouble or settles for unproductive three-point shooting, they can be had on offense. As an overwhelming favorite with rust, could get off on the wrong foot this series and be in real trouble. Are just 3-8 in the James Era against the Magic.

The case for Orlando: Have been the better team in both of their series this year, and have been extended only due to poor crunch time work. When they are hitting their threes, can beat anyone -- and frankly, make it look pretty easy. Cleveland has no good matchup down low for Dwight Howard on defense. In Rashard Lewis and Hedo Turkoglu, have definitive matchup problems for an opponent on offense. Stan van Gundy might have a tactical edge on Brown. For the first time in the playoffs, aren't really expected to win, so they could be playing with house money here.

The case against: Struggle in the half court when the threes aren't falling. Can be pressured with Rafer Alston at the point. Like everyone else in the Association, have no good matchups for James; could also be in real trouble to keep Mo Williams down, too. Might not have the front-court depth to compete, especially if Howard wears down or gets in foul trouble. Lewis and Turkoglu might give back everything they give you, and more, on defense. Won't have rest or home court, and are going against a team that just looks unstoppable right now. Have real issues holding a lead due to team-wide trouble at the free throw line; if they are going to pull the upset, they can't leave points on the table.

The pick: Cleveland in five. Orlando is much, much better than the Pistons and Hawks, but all that will mean here is that the Cavs will try harder, and win by a little less. This team is just too much in tune right now to give up more than a game.

Los Angeles vs. Denver

The case for Los Angeles: Best offensive talent in the post-season, especially up front. Huge coaching advantage in Phil Jackson vs. Furious George Karl. Some flakiness, but nowhere near the number of lifetime offenders as the opposition. For the first time in the playoffs, shouldn't get lit up too badly at the point guard position, since Chauncey Billups is more of a power point at this point in his career, and hence, a better match for Derek Fisher. After the Houston series against Shane Battier and Ron Artest, Kobe Bryant is going to feel like he's playing basketball in low gravity against Dahntay Jones, J. R. Smith, and maybe even Renaldo Blackman. Have ended Denver's season with regularity over the years.

The case against: Have been exposed as bipolar at best, and gutless at worse, in getting extended to seven games by an undermanned Rockets team. Have real problems guarding point guards and three point shooters. The scoring bigs can be taken out of the game by physical play, and Denver has the most physical bigs left in the playoffs. Won't have as much rest as their opponent, due to their own negligence. Up until the last game of the Rockets series, Andrew Bynum has looked lost. The bench, which seemed like a huge strength in the regular season, has given them little in the post-season. Soft as tissue paper; when your enforcer is your point guard, that's not a good sign, really.

The case for Denver: Playing with house money. Kenyon Martin and Nene, if they don't get whistled for everything, could really make Lamar Odom and Pau Gasol come up small, especially on the road. Have the rest advantage, and have to like their chances after watching those Rockets tapes. Carmelo Anthony is playing the best basketball of his life, and Billups is a borderline MVP candidate this year. It's hard to see the Lakers just putting the hammer down and crushing their opposition, and eventually that's going to cost them plenty against a quality opponent

The case against: That Kobe matchup is brutal for them. As this week's continued pissing match between Martin and Mark Cuban proves, the Nugget roster is not exactly devoid of meatheads; self-destruction is always possible. While Billups has been great at getting to conference finals, he's not exactly been to a huge number of NBA Finals; in crunch time, he tends to take the shot over better ideas like Anthony. Smith can take them out of their offense with highly dubious decisions. Bryant has, everr since the Eagle, Colorado fiasco, owned Denver at home.

The pick: Los Angeles in seven. They can be had, but in the final analysis, I just can't take the second-best coach and player, with home court. There's also the simple fact that if both teams play their best game, the Lakers win. But a Nuggets win would not shock me, at least not in the same way that, say, a Magic win would.

Our Long National Nightmare Is Over: Our New National Nightmare Begins

Tony the Cornhole out at MNF for the transparent lie that he couldn't hack the air travel. Hell, Tony, if that was all that it was, I'm fairly sure we could have arranged people to come shake the wings of any plane you were on.

Chucky Gruden takes the chair; announces his plan to spend 17 weeks talking about the back-up QB. But that, at least, will have *something* to do with the game you are watching, and should involve less Brett Favre Ball Washing...

Bonus 205 Drop: Top 10 signs of sports gambling degeneracy

The bonus link today comes from me messing up the posting date on my 205 drop, probably as a side effect of my growing gambling addiction. (I keed, I keed -- it's a very persistent gambling addiction, rather than a growing one.)

Anyway, go see where you stack up on the list. I'd put even money on 6 or higher.

205 Drop: Top 10 tips to get cheap heat from sports fans

Today's link is a good list of bad things for worse people, and I'm fairly sure that I've only engaged in some of these (in that the Photoshop work is beyond me).

I can also tell you, from having done this work for a couple of years now, that the big traffic posts are never the ones that you expect. A few weeks ago, I had a Lemur mention on a throwaway line following a Lakers recap; I also had a big traffic burst from a simple moment of appreciation for Stephen A. Smith. The latter also got me some relatively rare troll action (who knew Stephen A. had so much free time?), all for a fairly quick and dirty post.

The lesson: life, as Woody Allen once said, is 90% about showing up. So you just do the work and move on, and maybe get a payday or two if you're lucky. Or hated. That works too.

Lakers-Rockets Game Seven: Goliath Chooses To Show Up

Today in Los Angeles, the Lakers played defense and went up 17-4 in the early going, and that was really all that there was to this one. It was 51-31 at the half and the team traded baskets in the second half, giving the Lake Show a 4-3 series win with an 89-70 win.

The Lakers got a very big game from Pau Gasol (21-18-1, with 3 blocks on 10-of-19 shooting), who finally figured that he should crush Chuck Hayes. They also finally got a decent game out of Andrew Bynum, who was 6-of-7 in 22 minutes with 14-6-0 and 2 blocks. Despite Kobe Bryant being mostly contained by the Battier/Artest combo (4 of 12 from the field, 14-7-5 with 3 steals and 2 blocks), this one was never in doubt, mostly because the defense held the Rockets to 37% from the floor.

For Houston, just simply getting to Game 7 without Tracy McGrady, Yao Ming and Dikembe Mutumbo has to be something of a moral victory, but the simple fact is that this Lakers team is heart-free, so it can't feel that great to lose to them. If they ever get health from their top people -- well, I don't think they ever will -- they might get further than Final 8 status, and their management has managed to find some useful pieces from non-traditional places. I'm having a hard time imagining how McGrady is a part of this team after this year's career suicide, but maybe they can ship him out for a useful piece.

What they really need is for Aaron Brooks and/or Kyle Lowry to develop into a top-flight point guard tandem, rather than simply some guys who can make awful point guards (Derek Fisher, Jordan Farmer, Steve Blake, etc.) look bad. It would also be nice if they could get Testy to actually rebound the ball (5.1 per 34.8 minutes this year, which is just criminally light for a 6'-7" 260 guy who mostly plays the 3) and stop shooting threes (40% this year, 34% for his career), but I can't see how Testy is going to change his spots at age 30, in his 10th season.

Getting back to the Lake Show, they now get a Denver team that they've owned in recent years, with home court advantage. The Nugs are rested, have some very good defensive bigs (Nene, Kenyon Martin and Birdman Anderson) that could give Gasol and Lamar Odom some real trouble, and a potential closer in Carmelo Anthony. The Nugs are also playing with house money, since no one thinks they can make it to the Finals outside of Colorado. But they also aren't likely to hurt the Lakers as much at point guard, since Chauncey Billups isn't the kind of quicksilver killer that destroys Fisher at this point in his career, and they've never been able to stop Kobe Bryant... especially a Kobe Bryant that is going to truly enjoy the absence of Battier/Artest.

Celtics-Magic Game Seven: End Of A Non-Era

Tonight in Boston, the Celtics played their thirty-fifth Game Seven in the past 13 months. And this time, for the first time in their recent history, they weren't up to it. The Magic won, 101 to 82, to end the defending champions' run in the second round.

(By the way, be sure to check the Lemur to see if it's still open, seeing how the Bruins and Celtics were both eliminated in Game Sevens at home in the same week. Oh, and the Red Sox lost to the Mariner juggernaut today, too. Someone put some Prozac in the water, or the nation might lose some very, very special sports fans to highly dramatic suicides tonight.)

The end of the Celtics tonight was due to one player more than any other: Hedo Turkoglu, the much-maligned ex-Sacramento King and Euro player who has been the main reason why the Magic hasn't been as good in the playoffs as they were in the regular season. Tonight, he unleashed a monstrous 25-5-12 night, carrying the passing mail (the Turk had nearly half of the Magic's assists). He was, clearly, the best player on the floor tonight, and if he wants to play at this level in the Cleveland series, the Magic will put a real scare into the Cavs. (Especially if they want to shoot 65% from the arc.)

He was aided by the sizzling Mikael Pietrus, who hit six shots in a row to help the Magic start the fourth with a 19-5 run to build the lead to 19 halfway through the fourth. And every time the Celtics made a shot -- Paul Pierce with a three to cut it to 14 being emblematic -- the Magic answered, once with an improbable old-school three from Marcin Gortat. The fact that the Magic were able to do this despite foul trouble on Dwight Howard (12 and 16 in 36 minutes) makes it even that more impressive.

As for the Celtics, in retrospect, it's clear that they were highly fortunate to get past the Bulls. When your Game 7 bench consists of 34 non-garbage time minutes from Brian Scalabrine, Stephon Marbury and Eddie House, you no longer represent a basketball team, at least not a professional one. Without a heroic effort from Rajon Rondo (10-6-10 with 4-of-10 shooting), Kendrick Perkins (8-15-1, with 2 blocks, but also 3 of 11 from the floor), or, well, anyone with the possible exception of Paul Pierce, it's hard to see how they were supposed to be a Final Four team, home court and 3-2 series lead after Game Five be damned.

The Garden crowd was good and dead in the fourth, even after a Ray Allen three to cut the lead to 12 with 4:12 left, which lead to a timeout... and an utter dagger of a three from the Turk, and after a turnover, another make to push it right back to 17. By the last three minutes, the place was as quiet as a morgue, Doc Rivers was sending in his NBDL bench, and for all of the hue and cry that you hear from Boston Fan about how wonderful the tradition is and all that, I didn't hear much in the way of Thanks For The Memories late in this game. I'm sure you'll read plenty about that from the media, which is always highly critical of Boston Fan. (I keed, I keed.)

Next year, maybe, Kevin Garnett might return after some high risk surgery... but Big Baby Davis is an unrestricted free agent, and so is useful part Leon Powe, and with Garnett's extension just kicking in, he could completely crush this franchise under the weight of a huge and non-productive contract. It also stands to reason that Ray Allen might finally get old, and it's not as if Pierce has no miles on the tires, either. It's very hard to imagine how, even if Rajon Rondo were to gain a jump shot in the off-season (don't you love how people just assume he's going to get one, like he's never wanted one before?), that the Celtics will be better next year, and they weren't good enough this year.

For the Magic, they get to try to steal a win in Cleveland on Tuesday against the best team in the Association this year, who will have had a full eight days of rest. I suspect they'll be highly competitive in the first half of Game 1, until the rust comes off the LeBrons, and if they hit their threes, some actual worry might hit the home team. But not for very long, because I don't see how anyone on the Orlando roster will be able to do anything with LeBron, and Zydrunas Ilgauskas is the perfect type of center (i.e., one who plays away from the basket) to neutralize Howard on defense. But the Magic did win two out of three games with the Cavs this year, and eight out of their last 11, so it could be competitive. (A lot more than Celtics-Cavs would have been.)

But before we really go to full-blown Magic-Cavs analysis, let's take a minute to acknowledge what poor luck the Celtics had in not continuing to get eternal health for a high-energy defensive big man with well over 1,000 NBA games on his knees. Truly, they were cursed by nothing more than Ill Luck. But don't fret, Celtics Fan -- I'm sure your old pal Kevin McHale will trade Al Jefferson back for Garnett now, since the Association knows that the league just isn't watchable unless your team is good...

205 Drop: Top 10 most annoying sports fandoms

The top spot in the list today won't surprise any regular reader of the blog, but with any luck, it will be an equal opportunity cheap heat generator, because hey, that kind of thing is important.

There's also one more thing to say about this topic, which is that it's an entirely modern phenomenon. With the rise of Road Fan (and who can blame them, really, considering that airfare, hotel, rental car and front-row seats to see a top MLB+ team on the road is less than just going locally) and the Internets, we're all putting up with Other Fandoms more than we used to, and that's not going to go away anytime soon.

I am nothing if not cheery, kids.

Anyway, go click and get offended.

Best Bad Tooth Karma Moment Ever

Transcript from the Bad Tooth's live chat tonight. For those of us who don't follow the NHL, the Bruins lost in overtime in Game 7, at home, with the winning goal scored by the most hated player on the opposing team.

* * * * *

Hurka (Philly): Rocky is a Philly movie, I don't care how much you quote it. Boston doesn't get to use that. Not for their hockey team that no one cared about before this season.

SportsNation Bill Simmons: (11:19 PM ET ) Try to sell 10,00 tickets for a Sixers playoff game and you can give us crap.

(...)

SportsNation Bill Simmons: (11:21 PM ET ) Please stop. No more. I am waving the flag.

Dave (Boston,MA): Is there anything Philly isn't bitter about?

SportsNation Bill Simmons: (11:23 PM ET ) You gotta be kidding me.

SportsNation Bill Simmons: (11:23 PM ET ) Worst.

SportsNation Bill Simmons: (11:23 PM ET ) Case.

SportsNation Bill Simmons: (11:23 PM ET ) Case.

SportsNation Bill Simmons: (11:23 PM ET ) Scenario.

* * * * *

Oh, and in the same chat, he also slagged the Sixers for failing to defend their title. From 25+ freaking years ago.

Now, if the Magic could just win Game 7 in Boston...

Rockets-Lakers Game Six: Never Underestimate The Heart Of A Non-Champion

Tonight in Houston, the Lakers slept through the first half and trailed by 16. In the third quarter, with Phil Jackson's footprint in their collective ass, they came out and played defense, and more or less effortlessly cut the lead to 2 with a 16-2 run. Houston had that deer in the headlights, we can't actually score against these guys look that a spent team gets, and I started to write the "Lakers turned the switch on" lede to set up the Lakers-Nuggers preview.

And then the Rockets, well, just kept playing. Luis Scola refused to quit. Aaron Brooks continued to show how he's a sneaky great roto pick for next year (shh!), especially on an Iverson-esque drive where he more or less treated Pau Gasol like a Kleenex. Chuck Hayes made a few defensive plays. And the Rockets shook off the punch and built the lead back up to 9 by the end of the quarter, with their own 20-13 run.

Win or lose, that five minutes showed why this Rockets team demands your respect. No Final 8 team this year, or in recent memory, has gotten more from less against such superior talent. No Final 8 team has fought harder after losing their offensive leader, going against one of the best players in the world, against a coach that has more championships than anyone alive. Players like Brooks, Carl Landry, Von Wafer, Kyle Lowry, Hayes... anyone could have had them, really. They were not very high picks, or well-regarded on talent or attitude. Only the Rockets got them, coached them, got them to work as a unit and won 7 playoff games (so far) with them. If you're a Rocket Fan, you could not ask for more; if you are an NBA fan, you owe them a debt of gratitude for giving you much more compelling action than, say, the immensely more talented Hawks did.

In the fourth, Testy hit an ill-advised three with 7:30 left to make it a 10 point game. That's his third make against 15 misses from distance in the recent games, which means it was just a terrible idea, except, of course, when it works. (It also cost them later, in that Testy kept going back to the fool's gold well, but that's Testy for you.) A Gasol make was followed by a thunderous Hayes dunk to keep the game at 10. Bryant returned and tried to take over, but missed. Brooks then sliced the Lakers defense like old-school Steve Nash, getting Landry to the line, where he made one of two to push the lead to 11. The Lakers had a terrible possession end with an Odom make. Brooks misses, but Hayes boards, and the Rockets wisely ran clock. It ended with a Testy 3 miss, and the Rockets getting a break from a kick ball call that wasn't made. With 4:56 left, the lead is 9, and the Rockets had a better than even money chance at forcing a Game 7.

Why don't I like this Lakers team? Because their coach has to say things like, "When they score, don't whine, don't roll your eyes, just walk it off" when five minutes left in an elimination game. Does he also give them orange slices and Sunny D?

The teams traded baskets after the timeout, and Testy missed another bad 3, but Landry is all about the floor burn and called a timeout on the ground. Brooks with a make out of the timeout. Bryant's 3 is way off, and he's crying for the foul against the best defense imaginable from Battier. Brooks makes another, just channeling his AI 2000 right now. Landry with a huge block on Odom and the lead is still 13, now with 3 minutes left. Landry gets to the line at the end of a ragged clock kill possession, and that's Odom's fifth foul. Landry makes one, and the lead is 14; we're about 60 seconds away from the starters getting pulled and everyone talking about Sunday.

Kobe with a make to prolong the drama. Brooks runs clock, then gets Odom's sixth on a drive to the basket. The Lemur tells us that the Rockets have no fourth quarter turnovers -- and that's really an important point. When they don't turn it over, they play this Lakers team even. When they do, they get run out of the gym. Something to keep in mind for Game 7, and after two Brooks makes, that's where we are heading. Bryant with the missed three, and he's in I Have No Teammates mode. The Rockets turn it over, and Bryant drives and gets to the lane: 110 seconds left after one make, 13 point lead. A Lowry miss at the end of the clock, and the microcosm of the game: Landry ripping the board away from Gasol, because he just cares more than the Laker big. Telling, folks, telling. More clock burn ends with Brooks making two more free throws, and it's 15, and I'm going to stop with the micro-blogging at this point. The Rockets win in a game that the Lakers never lead, and your final is Houston 95, Los Angeles 80.

In the post-game interview, Brooks was asked about the team's lack of respect, and how they could possibly win Game 7 in LA. He smiles and replies, "We still have no chance." How do you not love him, really?

Now, what will happen in Game 7? Unless Brooks brings it for 30 points or more, a Lakers win; unless the Rockets shoot well and don't turn it over, it won't be close. But does this mean that the Lakers are vulnerable for the increasingly rested Nuggets?

Hmm, I say.

Hmmmm...

Celtics-Magic Game Six: A Shocking Lack Of Shock

Tonight in Orlando, Orlando and Boston played yet another meat grinder of a game, with the home team never getting separation and things looking like they'd wind up as another last-second contest. But then a funny thing happened; the team that can't close did, and Orlando ties the series at 3 with an 85-73 win.

The game turned on Kendrick Perkins' fifth foul, which happened halfway through the fourth. Immediately afterward, Rashard Lewis got to the rack (on a night where no one on the Magic, other than the immortal Mikael Pietrus, was hitting from distance) to push the lead to five. Paul Pierce insisted on slightly more drama than that, and made three straight to give the Celtics their final lead of the game. Dwight Howard then missed a couple of free throws just to prove that he's not a viable fourth quarter option, but a sudden and shocking turn from Rafer Alston of all people -- a steal and three -- tied it back up at 75 with 4 minutes left.

Misses and turnovers followed as both teams ratcheted up the defense, but Howard finally made one to give the home team the lead. For a second, it seemed like Pierce had turned the tide by drawing Howard's fifth. But he failed co convert the free throws, and Alston followed with a three and a block on Rondo (post-timeout), leading to Hedo Turkoglu's only very good moment of the game, pushing the lead to 6. The C's followed with a Rondo turnover and the Magic ran clock, finally getting Lewis to the line to make the final 85-73 score.

Before Orlando starts feeling too good about themselves, someone has to tell me how Rajon Rondo gets a 19-16-6 line with 4 steals (and, whoops, 5 turnovers). Sixteen boards for a point guard in 40 minutes? At some point, some one has to actually put a body on that guy, since he can't actually shoot; you might want to start boxing that guy out. Yeesh.

The real trouble for the road team was that while they held the home team to 36.6% shooting, they weren't much better themselves (41.6%). They also didn't get to the line, didn't shoot well from three, and committed ten more turnovers. It wasn't like the Magic played all that well (Howard had 23 and 22, Lewis had 20, and that's about it for guys having good games), either. But that the thing about the Drama Celtics; this will be their second straight year of going the distance in the first two rounds. You can credit them for closing the deal at home, or you can wonder about their game preparation, or age sapping their legs.

Anyway, Game 7 is Sunday, and the Celtics are 32-0 in series where they've lead 3-2. Magic coach Stan van Gundy, in his post-game press conference, then talked about how someone is eventually going to do this, and cited the 2004 Red Sox as his inspiration. You go, Ron Jeremy, and keep equating your team with the one that Boston Fan idolizes. It won't end any better for you, but at least you'll cause more high blood pressure and hurt feelings from the opposition's fans. And who knows, maybe Allen will continue to be old...

Fear Us

Skip Bayless says he was scared to come to Philadelphia as a member of the Dallas Cowboys media team. This, as part of a wide-ranging equalization of another team's bad fan behavior with our own, because we invented negativity. I'm so proud of us for that, but why the hell didn't we take out the patent? We could be swimming in Tastykakes, people. Let's not have another good idea like that without seeing cash from it again, please.

As for Skip being all scared of us, I'm pretty sure that I can speak for the entire region when I say... good? Yay for us? And why can't the rest of America step up and help us move forward, as a species?

But I feel your pain, Skip. Whenever I see you on my television, I get very afraid that I won't be able to find the remote fast enough to get you off my screen. So there's fear all around, really.

When Pigs STFU

I missed last night's mercy kill of the Mavericks last night in Denver, and will miss more NBA action this weekend due to going to site contributor Dirty Davey's wedding, but the wire feed has this juicy little moment.

Cuban, who skipped Game 5 to attend an awards ceremony in Las Vegas, had written in his blog this week that the Nuggets' families and friends could sit in his private suite "when the series returns to Dallas."

Can they still sit there to watch the rest of the NBA playoffs, Cubes? And why, exactly, are you opening up your suite to punks and thugs, anyway?

We all know, by the way, why you don't watch the game there -- no cameras.

I shouldn't be so hard on the Cube, however, since he gives NBA Fans so much. Mostly in the form of an annual holiday when his team is eliminated...

205 Drop: Top 10 moves to increase MLB attendance

Today's snarky list is here. Today's overly long rumination on today's list is below. Who said that we're a wildly unpopular sports blog due to our basic contempt for humanity? At least, who said that out loud?

Today, I'd like to say a word in defense of light crowds at the old ball yard. When I was a partial year season ticket holder for the A's during the stint in NoCal, I took the Shooter Child (now the Shooter Eldest) to about 20 games a year, and in that mix along with the de rigeur fireworks shows were a fairly strong number of mid-week night games where the crowds were fairly, shall we say, intimate. We preferred them, on many levels, to the games where Yankee Fan and Red Sox Fan invaded the park by the thousands to tell us how much of a craphole it was. (Thanks! We hadn't noticed!)

Part of that was simply wanting to avoid Yankee Fan and Red Sox Fan -- honestly, you people are worse on the road than you are at home -- but mostly, it was because baseball without a crushing crowd has its own charms. You can get to a bathroom or concession stand without a major commitment, for one. You don't have to step over people to tend to the needs of your small child, for another. If the person near you has to provide an R-rated soundtrack to the game, you can also just plain move. It's all to the good.

There's also just a more relaxed air to the whole thing. Baseball, on some very basic level, should just not be taken all that seriously. It's the same game that you see played by children without adult supervision, after all, and even if it doesn't have that whole Air of The Drama when the crowds are small, it's still a pretty good game, especially in person. You can relax watching it. Maybe help a kid with the coloring. Savor the taste of that only good at the yard hot dog, because it's only at the yard that you're actually not multi-tasking and grinding on so many fronts that you can, you know, actually taste it.

So to all of the teams that are taking it on the chin at the turnstile, I wish you nothing but continued challenges. And to the rest of us who just love the game, rather than all of the things that you have to put up with around the game... well, good seats available. And maybe, just maybe, not enough security people around to give a damn when we take that mid-game free seat upgrade.

205 Drop: Top 10 train wrecks I want to see in a so bad it's good SportsCenter competitor

Today's link is a fairly esoteric piece of snark, but it speaks to a wonderful and true hope of mine -- namely, that the field is large enough to foster (nay, demand) actual competition, and perhaps on the national level. And no, I'm not talking about going to watch Lemur News instead.

At its core, SC is the network flagship, and it needs to not only serve its constituents with just enough to keep them coming back, but also to do something more substantial on an advertising standpoint. It needs to keep the audience young. (And good luck with that, given all of the forces that are making sports fans gray faster than the competition.) Correctly or no, brand marketers prize younger viewers, who have more time to buy crap, more willingness to try new products, and are increasingly difficult to reach through other television buys.

Which leads us to an opening for more than just disgruntled Lemur watchers, who, to be fair, are probably less gruntled than they should be from the monopolistic Lemur control of the art form. (Yes, yes, I know; you could be watching homer-centric coverage, especially on networks like Comcast, NESN, YES, SNY and a bunch of regional Fox plays. By the numbers, people generally don't. Moving on.)

What might a SC-esque competitor look like? Well, if you start with the idea that the target is in their mid 30s to mid 50s -- not the sexiest demographic to sell ad space to, but still a hell of a lot better than most -- and work backward from that. So the on-screen graphics are a little larger, with the font size upped a bit. Catch phrases and references are reined in. It's probably dryer, with more highlights from each game. Commentators are less apt to scream (and, sadder, be diverse from a gender or ethnic standpoint). Maybe you're just seeing washed-up newspaper guys here, since there's a glut of guys who that group feels favorable towards, and would like to see get work.

And it'll be horrible at the start, and lose money for years until it found its way, assuming it ever does, because that is the nature of such things. So screw it, and just give us the train wreck.

Oh, and today's list also gives me one more chance to consider the wit, wonder and wisdom that is Brian Collins, who really does deserve to have his name remembered for changing the way we look at sports. Forever.

Lakers-Rockets Game Five: Bedtime

Going into tonight's Game Five in Los Angeles, there existed the faintest hope that maybe, just maybe, Team Rocket could continue to make the Lake Show sweat, especially after their shocking Game Four win. With Yao Ming on the bench, the theory went that the team was better on defense, Aaron Brooks had more room to penetrate, and the tag-team of Shane Battier and Ron Artest were wearing Kobe Bryant down.

Um, not so much.

The simple fact is that when the Lake Show wants to play, they've simply got another gear that Team Rocket does not. Despite a quick start by the visitors that led to a 7-point lead in the first quarter, the Lake Show began to force turnovers and get good minutes from Andrew Bynum. Suddenly, the Lake Show just looked much longer, with tons of easier looks, and the Rockets need to hit a ton of threes just to stay close. They didn't and it wasn't: at the end of the third quarter, it was 94-54. No, that score wasn't listed in error. I posted this puppy well in advance of the final score.

How dull was it? Laker Fan was bored enough to do the wave -- the wave? So much for LA being all superior to Flyover Land Fan -- for 100 point tacos. TNT had Craig Sager interviewing Kyra Segdwick and Kevin Bacon, and I found it more interesting than the game. (Bacon seemed chemically altered, and I have to give it up for Sedgwick -- it takes something to get your own show as a post-op tranny. What do you mean it isn't?)

The Rockets took their medicine without ugliness, and who knows, maybe they've lulled the home team to sleep again for Game Six. But with Denver looking like they could close things up early, and Kobe Bryant barely having to work for this one, a road close seems much more likely. It will be closer than this one, at any rate.

Celtics-Magic Game Five: The Magic Of Choking

Tonight in Boston, the Celtics had one of those nights where the defense wasn't very good, Ray Allen and Rajon Rondo weren't good offensively, and they were giving meaningful minutes to Stephon Marbury because, well, they had to. The gym was dead, the crowd worried in that way that only a crowd watching Stephon Marbury can be.

And then the Magic went cold, with jaw-dropping misses on wide-open threes, the crowd got into it, and yes, you have seen this movie before.

With 2:30 left, Allen found Kendrick Perkins for a layup out of a scramble. The Magic looked utterly helpless on their next possesion, eventually settling for a Turkoglu turnover. Big Baby missed a wide open short one. Rafer Alston lost his mind for another turnover. Allen shook Turkoglu on a back pick for a catch and shoot three, and the 11-0 run gave the home team an 86-85 lead, their first since the first quarter. Good grief, why does anyone even watch the first 40 minutes of a Celtics game?

Out of the timeout, the Magic got a clean three look from Alston out of a scramble; he, of course, missed, and the Celtics got the team rebound. Rondo missed the rim from 30 feet for a shot clock violation, and the refs missed the call and decided to give the home team the ball anyway. Yeesh. TNT ran multiple replays that showed the ball not hitting the rim, but what the hell, it's the Celtics, give them the ball and the full 24 second clock. When do they ever get any other break? Though, to be honest, I'm not sure the Magic will ever score again, so it wasn't exactly a game-changing call.

After a scramble drill bad possession, Allen missed from mid range, but the Celtics got the board again, and the game got closer to over. With 8.5 seconds left, the Magic put Eddie House on the line, and he hit both. Pierce wrapped up Lewis to prevent a trying three, and after the Dallas Game Three Tragedy, it's not like he didn't do it with authority. Lewis hit both, Allen responded with two makes, and there's nothing better than the last 10 seconds of an NBA playoff game, is there?

The Magic then put the final touches on this gift by barely getting the inbounds pass in to Dwight Howard, of all people, with 5.9 left. He hit the first, intentionally missed the second, but Davis controlled the rebound and hit his free throws -- the Celtics went 21 for 21 from the line tonight -- and that was that. Your final was Celtics 92, Magic 88, and the home team takes the 3-2 lead.

Game Six in Orlando? Well, if the past is any precedent, they'll air mail this and go to a Game Seven, which they will, of course, win. But after the exceptional fold that the road team gave tonight, you do have to wonder if they're even going to bother playing Game Six. After all, you're just going to lose Game Seven on the road, so why bother?

Strangely Recyclable

Is the head kept hot, and the feet cold?

From my head(phones) to yours

And, well, just because.

205 Drop: Top 10 referee moments from the NBA Playoffs

The most telling thing about today's list is that I was able to fill it before the second round was over. Part of that is bad media, in that the powers that be enjoy going down the path of the ugly rather than actual game reporting (technicals and flagrants are to the NBA what fights are to the NFL, kill shot tackles are to the NFL, and charging the mound is to MLB)... but the bigger part is that the zebras really are bad, noticeable, and a constant source of attention when they shouldn't be.

Here's how you know it's a problem -- when you *haven't* heard of the ref when they are announced in pre-game, you feel better, because everyone else has a bad history. I'm not sure there's an answer to it, or if this is just a matter of where your eye goes when the games are tight, as many of the playoff games this year have been. But for a league that was supposed to make this Priority #1 in the wake of the Donaghy Fiasco, it's still way too big of an issue.

Anyway, go get All Face with the click. Unless you're a Celtics Fan, that's probably your lasting memory of that series anyway. (So very, very sad.)

The Warriors Enjoy Moving Chairs on the Titanic

Word out of the Bay Area tonight that Chris Mullin, the onetime golden child of owner Chris Cohan and a franchise great, has been aced out by team president Robert Rowell.

It's hard to see the quality of this move. On the plus side, Mullin did draft Monta Ellis, Andris Biedrins and Anthony Randolph, and it's not like the Warriors lack for talent. On the bad side, he did make the unconscionable decision to pay huge money for Corey Maggette, has no control over the barely caring Don Nelson, and blown first round picks on Patrick O'Bryant and Ike Diogu; there clearly are worse guys having this gig in the Association, and he should probably get another shot at it at some point, preferably with an owner that isn't, well, a toxic piece of sludge.

As for the Warriors, I'm not going to slam them for going with a blank slate. As the Rockets and Thunder have shown, you don't need to be an ex-player to be good at this job -- hell, as Kevin McHale, Isiah Thomas and Michael Jordan have shown, it might be a detriment.

But the bigger problem is that Rowell has been there for years, and anyone who (a) willingly spends his life around Cohan, and (b) manages to impress him enough over the years to bury the knife in a reasonable hire is inherently suspect. And even if you can get over the presence of Cohan, so long as the W's are running Nellie on the bench, they'll be, at most, an entertaining sideshow. (Assuming, of course, that Ellis can safely avoid off-season mopeds this year... and that Nellie still gives a damn. Neither is a great bet.)

Small Consolation

Tonight in Dallas, the only guy on the Mavericks' roster who didn't more or less embarrass himself at the end of Game Three ensured that there would be a Game Five. Dirk Nowitzki poured in 44 points, 19 in the fourth, including the go-ahead tough make with 65 seconds left. The series moves back to Denver with the Mavs still more or less drawing dead, down 3-1, but at some point, some NBA team is going to have to blow a 3-0 lead, and this Nuggets team does have some Quitter DNA in it, at least prior to the Chauncey Billups transfusion.

Having said that.... it's not going to be these Nuggets, who led most of the game, and have led most of the series. They also have a legitimate crunch time assassin in Carmelo Anthony, who dueled Nowitzki with a career-high 41 points his own damn self.

And in the part of the game that the rest of the non-Association world cares about, yes, there was ugliness -- seven technical fouls, multiple flagrants, a dumb elbow from Anthony and even concerns that civilians will be messed with, all thanks to the bad loser act from Mark Cuban after the Mavs got jobbed at the close of Game 3. Denver will be highly motivated to avoid another trip to Texas, and Nugget Fan will be more than inspired to bring his A Game of Ugly for the incoming Mavs. At least Cuban won't be there, thanks to a highly convenient prior commitment in Vegas. Classic move on his part to light the fuse and walk away.

Still, in a series that seems good on the surface, but kind of nasty underneath -- who, exactly, am I supposed to root for here? Cuban? Furious George Karl? The collection of Nuggets reprobates? -- it's good to see Nowitzki have a decent day. What with him being involved with a grifter, no one would have blamed him for taking his owner's lead in crying over the Game Three ref job. I still think the Nuggets are winning this series, probably going away, but at least Nowitzki will be able to leave the year with some semblance of pride.

Self-Eject

Tony DiLeo, the mostly successful interim coach of the Sixers this year, has withdrawn his name from consideration to continue the job next year.

DiLeo is an organization lifer who seemingly wasn't interested in the full-year meat grinder commitment, nor the family sacrifice. He took the gig after Mo Cheeks was unable to get the team to take the Elton Brand transplant, and righted the ship enough to get them into the playoffs. Things looked really good with a half dozen games left in the regular season, where the team had an outside shot at the #5 seed, but they stumbled until the last game, when they were barely able to win in Cleveland against a LeBron-less Cavs team that was resting all of their regulars. Against the Magic, the team took an early 2-1 lead until the Magic got Hedo Turkoglu up to speed, at which point the favorites closed it out. The fact that they were able to take Game Six in Philadelphia without Dwight Howard was particularly damaging, and there was post-game griping from several players. But I'm still kind of surprised to see him say no thanks to the job.

Under DiLeo, the Sixers were 32-27, able to get good minutes out of rookie Marresse Speights, continued development from Thaddeus Young and Lou Williams, and solid years from the Andres, Miller and Iguodala. Frankly, I think his withdrawal was the right move for him personally, given that the next coach is going to have to revisit the Brand situation -- there is, of course, way too much money there to just walk away and play the kids, and as out of place as he seemed with an up-tempo team, he's clearly a better idea at the 5 than the wildly inconsistent Sam Dalembert -- and I'm not sure that's a situation that's coachable.

Speculation is that GM Ed Stefanski, on the job for a couple of mostly good years, might go to a big-name retread (Avery Johnson, Doug Collins, Eddie Jordan) for his next pick. Johnson has some possible interest, given his past work with Tim Duncan (aka, the very rich man' s Elton Brand), but I'm not sure I'm willing to hold my nose that much. Given the economy, it's also very possible that the team won't go for somone they'll have to pay well-known money to.

I'd like to see them spirit away a top assistant from a successful organization -- say, Clifford Ray from the Celtics (which would also help to weaken that team, especially on teaching their big men), or Mike Budenholzer from the Spurs, who might be getting tired of waiting for Gregg Popovich to give him the job in San Antonio.

But the simple fact of the matter is that the Sixers are seen as a treadmill team right now -- not good enough to threaten for a title, not bad enough to blow up and get acclaim for your rebuilding genius. Stefanski is going to have to sell this job to a really good candidate, and just might not have enough of a story to tell to get the best possible candidate. Which, given that this might be his last hire, puts him in a hard place... but a better one than if DiLeo's heart wasn't really in the gig.

LeBron Sherman Marches to the Sea

Tonight in Atlanta, your punitive favorite for the next NBA championship actually had to play the entire game for the first time in the playoffs. Atlanta led after the first quarter, but not the second, third or fourth, and while the game was close throughout, close doesn't much count when you're facing the best player on the planet at the height of his powers. Despite the worst game of the playoffs for main sidekick Mo Williams, the Cavs were still able to put the Hawks away in four.

The next round might be just as easy, really. Boston and Orlando won't end until Thursday night at the earliest, and if (hah!) that series goes seven, the younger and better Cavs will have a full week to get ready for their home court defense. This much time off at this time of the year can cause rust issues, but when you look at how James is is driving his crew right now, I'm just not seeing that come into play.

Take tonight's game, for instance. Halfway through the fourth, in a game that the Cavs could have easily mailed in so that they could clinch at home, they were up four with the Atlanta crowd in full throat. No one was making anything for the Cavs, but they also were refusing to give up anything from that lead... and then James simply canned a 26-footer off a Delonte West feed, and voila, 7-point lead and Hawk Fan's dream of being the Milwaukee Bucks in LeBron's '82-'83 Moses Malone quest for perfection were dashed.

When the Hawks threatened again at the 2-minute mark, James got the old-school three to make it seven again. And at the 52 second mark, it was his drive and kick to Williams for the dagger three that sealed it. Your final: Cavs 84, Hawks 74, and the Cavs are now 8-0 in the 2009 playoffs. Yeesh.

For the Hawks, it's another year where they made progress -- last year the 8 seed and the first round loss to the eventual champions, this year the 4 seed and the second round loss to the eventual champions -- and the Association is like that; it's crawl, walk, run. But despite their many athletic pieces and appealing home-court advantage, I'm just not feeling the love for them in the long run. Part of this is simply my disdain for Mike Bibby's game (he was 1 of 6 tonight with, um, one assist), some of it is just not liking their bench pieces since they let Josh Childress take Euro dollars: Flip Murray is an NBA journeyman for a reason. I'm also just not getting past the nagging feeling that they made too many whiffs when they had high draft position to ever be a serious contender.

In 2006 with the fifth pick, they take Shelden Williams instead of Brandon Roy, Randy Foye or Rudy Gay; in 2005 it's Marvin Williams instead of Deron Williams or (gulp) Chris Paul. Give me this Hawks' team with, say, Paul and Roy instead of Bibby and Murray, and you've really got something dangerous, rather than just good. As much as I like Joe Johnson, he's never going to be better than he is right now, and what he is right now is nothing that causes James any real worry. And sitting around waiting for the murder of Williamses to be both good and healthy is less fun, really, then watching Paul and Roy.

Finally, we're going to need dangerous in the East soon, because the first time that James burns through the playoffs is entertaining... but the second through sixth? Take another look at that picture of LeBron, and tell me how he stays awake for the other championships...

My Varsity Letter

If secrets constitute us as individuals, and secrets are crucial to storytelling, then it must be storytelling itself that expels us from Eden. Storytelling is corrupt and corrupting. - James Wood, writing about the works of Ian McEwan, in the 4-30-09 London Review of Books

So let me tell you a story.

When I was in high school, I thought long and hard about going out for football. This would have been a spectacularly bad idea, as I was/am 5'-3", around 135 pounds, and not even all that fast or shifty. My role would have been, at best, fourth quarter special teams, mascot/joke, and de facto star jock tutor. But what the hell, right? Life is short, death is long and the writer in me (yes, always) just wanted to hear pre-game motivational speeches from the coach.

Eventually I took the laughter of the coaches to heart and kept the clipboard in my hand as the team's reporter for the school paper, which let me go to all the games anyway. The coach even let me listen to the speeches, because why not, really? You don't have that job unless you like the sound of your own voice. (Or this one, of course.)

The Northeast High School varsity football teams that I covered were pretty mediocre. As with most "magnet" schools, we had a thin level of top-tier talent from the inner city, supported by scrappy/overmatched borderline 'burb candy asses. Let's just say you could really tell who our bench guys were, and that we were not at our best in an endurance contest.

Our best player was our starting QB and CB, a tall athlete who was basically a homeless man's Randall Cunningham. He was also our best basketball player, and while dreams of MVP level stardom came to those who saw his good moments, he was really more of a I-AA player, which is where he wound up.

In my years of following the team, there were two very memorable games. The first came when we played Frankford, who had Blair Thomas (a star RB at Penn State, a first round draft bust with Jets). It was a tight game for a long time, but every time Thomas touched the ball, the difference between his future and everyone else's became more clear, and he eventually dragged his team to the win.

The second was our big annual game against arch-rival Central. The game was played rain and mud that made Scooby Doo-esque foot fumbling common, especially for a reporter without cleats. Closest that I came to that special teams work, really.

At the half, buoyed by the knowledge from my feet and eyes and not noticing the presence of actual real-life reporters, I burst into the coaches room to tell the head coach to call more rollouts, so that our mobile QB actually had a chance at making a defender miss on the only part of the field that still had grass. It got me laughed out of the room so that the real minds could work. Maybe it's coincidence, but we did get more rollouts in the second half.

At the end of the year, I also found that the coaches, who relied on me as the only source of statistics, had voted to give me a varsity letter. Your call as to whether they did that to thank me for not trying out. I had my mom sew it on my gray 80's bomber cloth jacket, and didn't get any action, ever, while wearing it. There's nothing like being the reporter/hanger-on for a dramatic lack of action, kids. One benefit of the death of print journalism, really.

Blogrolling Is unpopular on many levels

Fewer people listen to Jose Canseco than read this blog. Jose, I weep for us both.

Major League Jerk finds an even more rotted tooth than the Bad Tooth. If you're missing your quota of Mass Hate from me this week, by all means click, and take pity the poor Boston fan/columnist, needing his small comforts of shadenfraude on a Sunday in May when his NBA team gets back to even in the Final 8, his MLB team wins a tight game against their division rival, his NHL team won a playoff game, and his NFL team moves another day closer to a year where they'll win their division in a walk. Clearly, they needed to bask in the misery of a team and fanbase that isn't even in their freaking league to somehow get through another day in their vale of tears.

In other news, the temperature in their collective asshole is 75 degrees, with light humidity and a strong southerly breeze. The weather is always nice it's the reason why they spend so much time there!


EMBED-Fan Does A Bruce Lee Flying Kick At Yankee Game - Watch more free videos

It's good to see that the fans at the new Yankee Stadium can still fight each other, rather than have their staff do it for them. I am a little disappointed that the spectators didn't chant "E-C-W! E-C-W! E-C-W!" after the flying kick, though.

An unprovoked Mark Cuban confronts Kenyon Martin's mother to tell her that her son is a thug or a punk. Happy Mother's Day! You know what else he is, Cubes? A member of a team with a playoff pulse. Also, a member of a team who doesn't have a complete asshat for an owner. The only way this story gets better is if the Angry Yellow Man decides to take matters into his own hands in Game Four. Does God love us all that much? Only time will tell.

(Kudos, by the way, to embattled Dallas forward Dirk Nowitzki, for having oceans more class than his owner. With luck, maybe this will enrage the UFL commish enough to move him.)

Update -- God does love us, and Kenyon's said, "I'm going to take care of it." The quote continues, "By violently assaulting him until his smarmy little head leaks brain juice out of his eyes, ears, nose, mouth and a new hole I'm going to call 'Kenyon's Fun Zone'." Oops, I'm sorry, that last part was just in my own mind.

Mike Florio from the Sporting News fingers six 2009 NFL playoff teams that he doesn't think will make it back. My team isn't on it, so he must be right.

205 Drop: Top 10 conclusions from the Manny Ramirez suspension

Today's list of snark concerns a little-known outfielder for the Dodgers, some guy by the name of Ramirez. It's a little surprising that he doesn't get more press notice, having been suspended for 50 games for violating the league's drug policy, but I suppose once this story happened to JC Romero, it's all old hat. Anyway, go click...

Celtics-Magic Game Four: Next Stop, Game Seven

Tonight in Orlando, the Celtics evened their series with the Magic, and in all likelhood, won it. That might sound premature, given that the Magic have led for more of these games than the Celtics, and a last-second 1-point win in a game where you outshoot the opposition by 13 percent from the floor doesn't sound like something to draw a lot of conclusions from. But I've seen the Drama Celtics just enough to know that they aren't losing Game 7 at home, and there's no way the Magic are going to win the next two games. So, you do the math. (You also trust that the Cavs will avoid such drama, especially when they will have a week's worth of extra rest and home court.)

Tonight in the minutes that mattered, Courtney Lee made Eddie House disappear, Brian Scalabrine was helpless, Big Baby Davis continues to be the biggest flopper since Vlade Divac, and the Magic were somehow in the game despite Paul Pierce having the range, and shooting under 40% for their own damn selves. With 8:58 left, Pierce picked up his fifth in a ticky-tack play, and after a make, it was 83-80 and serious worry time for the visitors. But eventually the Magic went back to players like JJ Redick and Anthony Johnson, and that's not exactly a recipe for the Eastern Conference Championship.

With four minutes left, Lee made a nice hesitation jumperr to get things tight, but Rondo was able to draw Howard's fourth foul on an air call. After a single make, it was back to a three point game. Rondo nearly had the steal, but Lee recovered and drained another mid-range shot to cut it to one. Pierce got to the rim but got no call, and Lee missed the go-ahead -- the kind of shot you need to make -- but Davis decided to travel rather than try to shoot over Howard. With 150 seconds left, it was Celtics 91, Magic 90.

After the timeout, Howard missed the Magic's second chance to take the lead. An Allen miss from the corner gave the Magic the ball with two minutes left, and Boston had missed it's last seven shots. Lee's jumped was blocked, and for the third time, the home team didn't take the lead. Pierce missed on good defense from Mickael Pietrus, and Turkoglu's three-pointer clanged out, but not until Rondo failed to control it, giving the Magic possession.

After the timeout, the Magic actually tried some ball movement, and got Howard to the line. His struggles there are well documented, but after two makes, the Magic finally got the lead, with 50 seconds left, 92-91, for the home team's first lead in the second half. It only lasted for 17 seconds, as Davis made a huge bucket. Turkoglu's three pointer missed again, but Pietrus got the board (and was probably fouled), and the Magic called time with 16.7 to go.

Turkoglu has a reputation for fourth quarter greatness, but he's 0 for 5 in this one. Instead of going to Turk Iso, the Magic swing the ball to Lewis, who gets to the line against a Davis foul. Lewis is overpaid and has many holes in his game, but free throw shooting isn't one of them, and he makes both to give the home team the 94-93 lead with 11.3 seconds left.

The de riguer timeout -- doesn't Doc Rivers know that the only way to get Phil Jackson's reputation is to not call timeouts? -- gave us the opportunity to see Ray Allen's clutch bio, which to be fair, is extensive. Rondo feeds Pierce, who gets it to Davis, and Big Baby casually drains a line-drive jumper from 21 feet to win it. Yeesh. You can't blame the Magic too much for guarding Rondo, Pierce and Allen and losing to Davis from distance. But had they made any of those shots in the last three minutes, they might have had the margin for error to avoid a tied series on a last-second make. But then again, what should you expect from a team whose arena is named after Amway?

As for the men from Massachusetts, I'm clearly not a Celtics fan, but Lord, they do deliver the drama. We'll have three more games from them until it stops.

Lakers-Rockets Game Four: Phil Jackson Is Letting Them Play (Badly)

Today in Houston, with neither of their top (and vastly overrated) stars, the Rockets jumped to a big early lead on the visiting Lake Show and refused to let up, tying their best of seven series at 2-2. Give credit to the home team for big effort and great ball movement, along with terrific on the ball defense. No one wants to say this out loud, but the Rockets are just better on defense without their big man, because while he's good at weakside help and rebounding, you can more or less kill him down low. But that's for another day.

Rather, it's time to give it up for the home team in refusing to just accept their role as tragically undermanned. With Aaron Brooks and Shane Battier leading the way, they more or less controlled this one for all 48 minutes.

How bad was it? I wrote the lede 90 minutes before the game ended. I had no fear of the Lakers coming back and making my work irrelevant. I polished it as the Lakers went on a 13-2 run to start the fourth, because that run made it an 18-point game. And that faith was rewarded, even though the Lakers did make the final score a lot closer than the game.

Not to overreact to a single loss, but today was one of those moments where you have to wonder why, exactly, Phil Jackson is universally regarded as a genius. If you want to chastise the Lakers for not showing up for this game, how about their coach? It was 17-4 in the first quarter with Philip sitting on his ass, refusing to call a timeout or make a substitution. Shane Battier rained down three pointers, Chuck Hayes was never exposed on offense, the Lake Show couldn't keep a handle on the ball... and the ABC/Lemur team gave Phil the mouth job for letting his team play through it.

Um, well, OK... but at some point, does anyone want to note how he never wins unless he's got the best player on the planet? The Lakers are still going to win this series, because they've got home court, Team Rocket's role players won't show on the road, and Testy will eventually take the bait of Kobe Bryant putting him on the express train to Crazytown.

But very good teams don't play extra games in the playoffs, because people get hurt: halfway through the third quarter, Lamar Odom went down in a heap on a charge, on one of those scary to watch plays that could make him less effective in the coming weeks, and he didn't return to the game with back spasms. They also don't have their coach more or leas telling their players to just take their lumps, as Jackson did to Odom late in the third. And finally, they actually have some semblance of planning on their rotation. Right now, the Lakers rotate three not very good point guards, keep giving minutes to a helpless Andrew Bynum, and have no idea who will show up on a game to game basis after Bryant and Gasol.

Today's Confetti Bucket Moment came from an inbounds play to end the third quarter. Testy threw the ball from 60 feet, finding Brooks at the rim. Brooks caught the ball up high, then made the short one... and if you are wondering just how in hell the Lakers allowed a six foot guard to catch a 60-foot pass with a second left in the quarter, well, you haven't watched enough Laker basketball. There's a reason why the team with the best offensive bigs and Kobe Bryant doesn't win championships, and the answer is heart. They just don't have one.

Also this aside: the halftime showed clips from Spike Lee's mouth job on Kobe Bryant. Let's just say that between this and Stuart Scott's continuing pimping of Vitamin Water -- seriously, can he just wear their swag now and get over it -- let's just say the Association and the Lemur have had better moments. They do realize that many Association fans actually hate the Black Mamba, don't they?

Finally, there's this: so long as Battier wants to outplay Bryant, sweat all over the sideline reporter and basically be the best player on the floor, I'm willing to forget that he went to Duke. Dude is on the verge of becoming lovable, really.

Shockingly, the Mavs aren't happy with the refs

I did what NBA detractors say you should always do with Game 3 of the Mavs vs. Nuggets series -- turned it on at the end of the third quarter. (Blame it on Mother's Day prep, and the fact that watching Mark Cuban gives me hives.)

So I tuned in at 80-79, just in time for the Lemur to tell me how the Nugs have ran the Mavs out of the building in the fourth in each of the earlier games, and it looked like more of the same as Carmelo Anthony exerted his will on both ends. But Melo giveth and Melo giveth away, and his bad turnover got the home team back in it. The Denver bigs were also in big foul trouble, with Birdman Anderson fouling out with nine minutes left, and Nene replacing him with five.

I have to say, I'm relieved to have missed a lot of this one. When the game has 80+ free throws and the teams are never more than six points apart, that's old-time Pistons basketball, and when you add that to reaction shots of Mark Cuban, that's not exactly what I think of as an afternoon well-spent. But at least the fourth quarter had some flow and drama.

In crunch time, Chauncey Billups crushed the Mavs -- he had 32 tonight -- as part of the continuing proof that Jason Kidd can't guard anyone, but at least he can punish people in the post. Both teams got the D up late, with matching turnovers, and with 1:28 left, Anthony got called for a foul on a loose ball on the floor, his fifth, on a fairly weak call; the subsequent free throw put the lead back to three at a time where the Mavs looked fairly lost on offense. Billups then missed from point blank range, and Nowitzki missed badly on a shot that would have been a dagger. Nene then showed his previously dormant chops on a baseline spin move to cut it to 1. Jason Terry then made a corner three with 31 second left to make it a four-point game, and you start to think this series was going to go longer. But Carmelo Anthony had other ideas.

The Syracuse man converted to get it back to two. Dallas called time to run the highly innovative play of Give It To Dirk And Hope; Kenyon Martin's defense forced a miss there, and the Nuggets got the board with 6.5 seconds left. Dallas, and this is critical, had a foul to give. The Nuggets inbounded to Melo, and as he rolled around the top of the arc, Dallas's Antoine Wright committed a foul... but the refs didn't call it, and 'Melo kept playing, rising up to hit an off-balance three that was absolutely huge. The last play og the game was Dirk missing again, and just like that, it's 3-0 Denver, and all over except for the crying (from Josh Howard and Mark Cuban, who admittedly is an old hand at feeling aggrieved by the refs).

Now, I have to say, I've got no sympathy for the Mavs on this one. If you're going to foul a guy, you need to make it more obvious than what he did to Anthony. You also probably need to go tell the ref in the dead ball before it happens. And if Nowitki can do anything in the fourth -- he ha 33 and 16 tonight, but none when it mattered -- the road team isn't close enough to steal it.

As for the Nuggets, they continue to look like an interesting dark horse, except for the fact that Kobe Bryant treats them like he treated that girl a few years ago. (Hey-o!) If they can sweep the Rockets and the Lakes get taken deep by Houston, maybe they can steal the first game on the road and make it a series. But since Yao Ming is now out for the rest of the playoffs due to a broken foot, I'm thinking it's looking more like two fast series in the West. And that's not such a bad thing, because less Mark Cuban on the television is just good for everyone, really.

LA With The A Game

Tonight in Houston, we saw why the world thought the Lakers were a lock for the Finals, as they simply brought a higher level of game than the Rockets could match.

The game was intense but not chippy, well-officiated, and everything you could hope for, except drama. The single biggest difference was that while the Lake Show went 8 of 35 from the arc in the first two games, they were 11 of 20 tonight. They led by double digits most of the way. For Fisticuffs Lovers, there was a questionable moment with 9:13 left when Von Wafer edged into a parachuting Sasha Vujacic, but honestly, the biggest problem from the play was hearing Jeff van Gundy pule about the state of the world today. You also had a late Testy ejection on a really borderline flagrant foul call against Pau Gasol, which more or less proved that the refs have one standard for Testy, and one for the rest of the NBA world. Not a great thing for Houston, that.

The signature play happened at the end of the third quarter, off an inbounds play with 3.5 seconds left. LA ran the old straight line pick play for Bryant to catch and shoot, the way the Bulls used to run for Jordan. Artest defended it perfectly, using his gym muscles to face the basket and force Bryant to make the catch near the sideline, 35 feet away from the hoop. Bryant went sideways to line it up from straightaway with Testy all over him, then rose up and drained it from just outside the tip-off circle. Just sick, really, the kind of play that only he and LeBron James can be expected to make in the Association this year. The shot capped a 24-14 quarter for the Lake Show, and gave them a 12-point lead. (And with 7 minutes left, Bryant had another ridiculous make when Shane Battier blocked it clean, and he just made a falling backwards runner while just trying to draw a foul. Shane Battier made him work, but he still had 33-6-3.)

For Houston, Testy missed with volume misser (10 of 23, 2 of 8 from distance, most of the misses early to build the hole), Yao Ming limped at the close and didn't overwhelm with his 19 and 14, and they just didn't get a very good game from anyone. I suspect they'll take another Game in this series, because I don't see the Lakers being disciplined enough to win again on the road in Game 4. But if Ming is hobbled again in Game 4, all bets are off... and he really didn't look all that good at the end of this one.

The Team That Can't Close Keeps Closing

Tonight in Orlando, the Magic took the series lead behind the two players that turned the Sixers series for them -- Hero Turkoglu and Rashard Lewis -- and the home team overcame the one-game suspension loss of Rafer Alston to thump the Celtics. Dwight Howard had 17 and 14 with 5 blocks in just 28 foul-plagued minutes, and the team actually increased the lead with him on the bench. They even got 11 points from Phantom of the Opera Courtney Lee, and held Ray Allen to 3 of 13, and Paul Pierce to 6 of 15. Your final was Magic 117, Celtics 96, and that's about how close it was.

Frankly, this series is starting to resemble Hawks-Heat, in that both teams can't seem to show up for the same game. And the final score could have been even worse if it weren't for another hot night from Eddie House, who went 6 of 7 from the floor and had 15 points in 19 minutes.

But if you really want to know what's going on here, it's simple -- the Celtics don't have the legs, and maybe at this point the heart, to play good defense every night. The Magic shot 60% from the floor tonight, and 50% from the arc. It also didn't help much that their bigs (Perkins, Davis, Scalabrine) combined for 14 fouls in 81 minutes.

There's also this: the Magic are said to have a big problem late in games, because they get scared to give the ball to Dwight Howard, for fear that he'll miss too many free throws. But this really doesn't work, because while Howard is a bad free throw shooter, he's not utterly helpless: he'll make 6 of 10, which is only a point or two worse for every ten shots than most of the other big men in the league. If you play Hack-A-Dwight, you're going to lose; that strategy really only works, if it works at all, if the shooter is sub-.500, especially late. If the Celtics want to win games here, they'll need to ramp up the defense and stop running up big deficits.

I still expect the Celtics to prevail in a long series; no matter how bad you look, one loss is one loss, and Allen and Pierce aren't likely to be MIA for two straight games. But at this point, the series has had 154 minutes, and the Magic might have been the better team on the floor for over 100 of them. If the Magic win Game 4, they will win this series.

Blogrolling Will Fight, Scream, Pinch Nipples, and Stop Crime

Sign of the Apocalypse #3006 -- guys running around in superhero outfits for real, working to stop crime. Call me when you get costumed adversaries, boys, so that I know when I've got even bigger losers to mock...

Howard Eskin is now pinching nipples. No, wait, actually worse: stealing them. And dressing up as a Star Trek nerd. Oddly, it doesn't really change the way I feel about him.

Nick Underhill does the Manny thing better than most.

Your hero and mine, with, QUITE FRANKLY, the most important site on the Web. Everything he blogs is important! (And it must be, considering he's posted five times in the last six weeks.)

And finally, presented without undue comment, the top-ranked story on Ballhype this fine day. Hockey Fan sure does like it when the guys with the most pads throw down. Every mention has a video clip, and the blogger feels much shame.

205 Drop: Top 10 signs you'll never make it to the start of the NFL season

Today's list is more or less directed at the people in my life who can't get into the cornucopia of spring sports goodness, because it has no football. I'm here to mock your pain, of course, because it's fun and I'm mean and there are 125 days until that first Thursday night when the only league that matters for you returns. Enjoy!

The Manny Taint

I'm not going to dig too deeply n the ManRam story here today. Someone in Blogfrica has to avoid it, and frankly, there's nothing here that we haven't seen a hundred times before, and with each time it happens, it shocks a little less. It also says something that the biggest story here isn't that he cheated, but that MLB caught him, and is actually going to subject him to the same punishment that it has given to the borderline players that have been caught before. JC Romero and Manny Ramirez, equal in the eyes of the law. That's a little refreshing, on some level.

Assuming no further complications (a big assumption, but one that's relatively safe, given the amount of money that's behind ManRam's rehabilitation), he'll return in early July. The Dodgers will still be in first place in the mostly putrid NL West. Given Manny's advancing age and interest in proving the world wrong after this scandal, they might even be better off for this in the long run, given that they'll have a much fresher Ram for their playoff run.

The only thing this does is take the Dodgers down from a 100-win team to a 96-win team, because even though ManRam makes their whole lineup better, it's not like they don't have a good lineup without him, and a weak division to kick around. The biggest hit in the Man Ram saga is all of his fantasy owners, who now get to hate him just as much as his non-owners. It's a bonding moment for all of us, really.

But before we put this thing to bed, I'd like to talk about the New England major sports champions of the last decade, and how every single one of them -- yes, amazingly, all of them -- are now more or less trading in dirty trophies. (And before Boston Fan jumps to conclusions as to how I'm clearly a New York Fan to go here, um, nope. Sorry about that.)

The Patriots, you know about, and the NFL's remarkably tone-deaf treatment of the matter means that we'll never really be able to put that team to bed. The 2004 Red Sox are loaded with guys that fit the profile of Roid Achievers, and their right-handed offensive linchpin is now an admitted cheat. ManRam is still a major contributor in 2007, along with a number of other likely suspects. The 2008 Celtics are the cleanest of the bunch, and they get to the Finals when a Hall of Fame ex-player packages his franchise player for a package of guys that play on just one side of the court, if at all.

This causes me no real joy. A tainted title is a wound that doesn't heal, and makes you wonder, really, why you bother watching the games.

But on the plus side, we get to hear Boston Fan cry about how awful this all is, and how everyone cheated and... zzzzzz... sorry, nodded off there. Enjoy your ignominy, Manny. Especially if, as some in Blogfrica are speculating, your cheating came from sexual performance doping, rather than pure athletic performance cheating. Nice legacy.

The Worst Playoff Team Ever

The Atlanta Hawks have played nine games this postseason. Nine times, the game has been unwatchable; tonight's game was over, charitably, at the half, when LeBron James hit from 45 feet, more or less just to see if he could hit from there. Adding to the misery was a blown ankle for Joe Johnson; add this to the injuries to the big men, and this series could end in 3.

See for yourself. I think this happened in the third quarter.



Oh, and don't let the final score (105-85) fool you; this was 85-55 after three quarters, and the fourth was all deep bench players. Atlanta has a home crowd, and maybe they actually give the Cavs a game into the third quarter in game three, but if the Hawks win a game in this series, it's the upset of the year. They'll be well-rested for the Eastern Conference Finals.

The Man Ram Goes Down

Manny Ramirez gets 50 games for steroids today, according to the LA Times. I'd say more, but the Bad Tooth will probably get you 5,000 words by close of day, and I've got a day job...

Socially horrifying

In this week's issue of the New Yorker, professional provocateur Malcolm Gladwell talks about the David vs. Goliath dynamic, and how the underdog wins more often than not... which is to fight a different battle. (David broke ranks and used artillery; the Philistines stayed in classic battle formation.) He also goes into a long examination of an unheralded girls' basketball team from Redwood City, CA that used the full-court press every game and wound up going to the national championships, despite not being very good at anything but the full-court press. Relentless effort beats superior talent, because in the words of the late great Fred Shero, relentless effort is a talent.

In between lots of sniffing about how the outsider perspective is better, and that many teams should press (highly debatable, but besides the point here) rather than lose while fighting Goliath's battle, Gladwell hits on a central truth: to win using the David tactics is to consider options that are socially horrifying to the status quo. If you are used to a half-court basketball game with set plays, head to head defensive matchups, visible coaching stratagems and all of the other conventional bells and whistles, 48 minutes of trapping is about as appealing as a stick in the eye. It's ragged, without flow and prone to big runs in either direction, leading to a drama-free conclusion. If both teams press and run and do it well, it can be great, but most of the time, the styles won't match, and you get a mess. The same goes for any court sport (hockey, soccer, tennis, and for all I know, lacrosse and rugby).

And this is a key point: court sports have a higher standard to meet than games driven by individual actors (baseball, boxing, golf) or rare events (football). Listen to the Bad Tooth's podcast following the Celtics winning Game 7 against the Bulls (ok, actually, don't), and you can hear the palpable disappointment that the last game also wasn't close and a classic. That's not just a ridiculously spoiled fan's perspective; that's what someone who is watching pro hoop even if he doesn't have a rooting interest in the laundry feels. It's also why football and baseball fan thinks that hoop fan is something of a snob and/or ridiculous. In those sports, it's enough -- hell, much more than enough -- if your laundry wins. In court sports, the laundry has to win in a way that's easy on the eyes.

Socially horrifying shows up in football and baseball too, of course. In football you have the run and shoot or spread offense, the Wildcat formation, a million different ways to try to recover an onside kick and so on, and so on. In baseball, you have the Three True Outcome sabermetric softball players and the pitch count injury worriers, respectively. But the games are too closed for even radical innovations to have that much impact, and there is no socially horrifying way to play the game, really; you just can't get that far away from the median to reach that level. Though Lord knows, Andy Reid does try.

Anyway, something to keep in mind the next time your favorite team is going down to defeat against a heavily favored team, Are they prepared to take socially horrifying actions -- say, a blow to the head that prevents a game-tying layup, or a standard-setting elbow that prompts referee overreactions that favor the less physical team... or performance enhancing substance use? And if they aren't, are you OK with them really not doing everything they can to win the game?

205 Drop: Top 12 ways to fake an interest in the NHL Playoffs

Today's list of snark plays on my 20-year-old knowledge of the NHL, a league that I used to geek so hard on, I used to organize Strat-O-Matic tournaments over it, and started my own pre-Internt stat league. Nothing, and I do mean nothing, says Geek Thug Life like running a league before the Net, and yes, this was The Before Women Era. How did you guess?

Anyway, I used to know everything there was to know about the league, to the point of winning the dork crown (and paying for my Steve Yzerman jersey) three years in a row. So what happened? Well, all sports viewing went away for a while in the '90s when music was my unpopular side career choice (rather than, well, this), and the NHL did everything they could to become less relevant to my life. Dull games -- the New Jersey Devils' "zone trap" alone made the game unwatchable -- work stoppages, crazed cable money grabs (you can still make old-time NHL fans shudder with the words "Sports Channel") and the worst management decisions ever made by a purported major league made me question why I was here, and if I really had to stay.

When a hockey game is low-scoring, it can be fascinating... but it can also feel like the outcome is more or less random. No player in any sport has more impact on a game than a hockey goalie; if he's terrible, you lose no matter what, and if he's great, you win no matter what. Most of the time, the games aren't decided by the difference between the pipes, but it happens enough of the time, and kept happening to my Flyers, to make me wonder why I watched or care.

Being a Flyers fan also didn't help, as it meant my team would routinely kill my hopes in the post-season and make me hate management (Bobby Clarke, the player, good -- Bob Clark, the GM, horrifying) and my fellow fan. People talk about Philly Fan as if he's always the same guy, but he really isn't. Sixer Fan is not Flyer Fan is not Phillies Fan is not Eagles Fan; there is a different mix of defeatism and rancor that ratchets it up the line as you move away from sports where both teams have to play well to make it watchable for anyone but the laundry enthusiast (basketball, hockey), to activities where domination by your team isn't ever boring (baseball, football). This makes your fan base more or less tolerable to be around, in my opinion.

Anyway, as the blog has now greatly exceeded its yearly quota of NHL talk and given hope to the folks who are desperate for any non-NBA post, go click and enjoy the cheap heat already. With any luck, I'll have Canadians insulting me soon enough, because it's just adorable when they try to do that...

The Lakers and Rockets Are Starting To Dislike Each Other

Tonight in Los Angeles, order was restored. Kobe Bryant came out like a house on fire, and after the first quarter, it was all Lakers, 39-25, and we looked well on our way to the home team shaking off all rust and exerting their will.

And then the second quarter started, and the Rockets showed how things were going to be very different.

With a 16-point turnaround engineered by Ron Artest and the bench, the visitors shook off the first quarter blitz and foul trouble on Yao Ming to take a lead. More importantly, they showed the Lakers bench to be a weakness, especially when it came to converting from distance with a hand in their face. The game turned around so much, Testy was chatting up Jack Nicholson and Coach Philip was actually involved. I'm not a Laker Fan or a Rocket Fan, but hearing the dead LA crowd and seeing Coach Philip upset is, I confess, starting to sway me towards the road team. And I'm starting to suspect that TNT feels the same way, in that they were giving love to Testy's barber. (No, seriously.) It was tied at the half at 57.

In the third, the Lakers put Ming back on the banch with his fourth, Bryant got it going again, and the Lakers were able to push it back to a double-digit lead behind Lamar Odom controlling the boards. Then it got stupid chippy, with Derek Fisher clocking Luis Scola in the face a play after Scola and Luke Walton had beef, and honestly, Fisher would have gotten five minutes and an ejection in the NHL, let alone in a game where the players don't wear pads. It was so bad, even the refs got the call right with an ejection. See it for yourself here.



And that, more than anything else, tells you all that you need to know about this series. The Lakers don't go to this level of dirt unless they are feeling well and truly threatened, and with bench guys like Carl Landry (21 points and 10 boards on 7 of 9 shooting, in just 23 minutes) giving the road team big benefit, you can see how comfortable the road team feels in this matchup. So long as the Lake Show is getting next to nothing from Sasha Vujacic, and the Rockets are getting hyper-effective play from Testy (tonight he was 8 of 14 for 25 points), they are going to be a very, very tough out...

But only if they don't implode from their own damn selves. Reserve Von Wafer got tossed for arguing with coach Rick Adelman, and when you say things that Ron Artest's coach can't abide, you must be kind of special. Then, Testy got tossed his own damn self with 6:57 left, after Artest got called for a foul after Bryant got away with an elbow to the throat. After getting no satisfaction from the refs, Testy got into it with Bryant, and with the refs on amber alert after the Fisher ejection, a quick-trigger toss of the most infamous player in the NBA wasn't all that surprising.

It also was pretty terrible, flow-free basketball, which is just what happens when the refs get scared these days. When actual basketball happened in the fourth, the Lakers were able to get enough on the break, especially form Houston turnovers, to finish out the win. That's how Lakers will win this series; with Team Rocket turnovers, because every Houston offensive option is prone to do bad things under good on-the-ball pressure, and the Rockets aren't explosive enough on offense to overcome late deficits.

But great pressure and third quarter leads are not the kind of thing that an erratic and thin defensive team does on the road, and that more than adequately describes this Lakers team now. The Rockets have home court advantage now, and if the refs ever let the teams play again, this one's going long, nasty, and good. Especially if Bryant loses his temper with the refs, the Rockets, or his teammates. There's all kinds of ticking time bombs in this series, on both sides.

House of Slap

Reasons returned in Boston tonight, as the Celtics evened their best of seven series with the Magic with a decisive 112-94 win. The home team overcame what might have been the worst playoff game of Paul Pierce's career (1 for 4, only 16 minutes due to foul trouble) to tie it up at 1-1, and they did it with the same player that iced Game 7 of the Bulls series for them -- back-up guard Eddie House. House shot 11-of-14, with 5-of-6 from the arc, for a game-high 31 points in 28 minutes. He also allowed Rajon Rondo to do what he does best -- penetrate, go to the boards and distribute -- which led to a 15-11-18 line with just three turnovers. (For the worrisome Boston Fan, Rondo was still just 7 of 19 from the floor. If the man had a jump shot, he'd be illegal.)

I suppose I need to get you to the only play from this game that will resonate for the general public, which is when Rafer Alston showed himself to be the Magic's weakest link by reacting to a House make and elbow with a bitch slap upside his head. Spinning the headband makes it especially potent on the visuals. Let's just say that you shouldn't expect to see Mr. Alston in Game 3, and how he wasn't ejected in Game 2 is yet another one of those Man, These Refs Suck moments.



If you want to beat House, who almost single-handedly gave the home team the edge in bench scoring tonight (43 to 29), you do the things that have made 7 other NBA teams decide they could live without him: make him defend and pass, rather than shoot by coming off screens. For his career, he averages 1.6 assists per game (in 17 minutes) against 0.8 turnovers; that's not quite Nate Robinson level, but it's getting there. He's also listed as 6'-1", 175, and both measurements look generous to me. But hey, big ups to him for a great post-game quote. (Skip to around the 50 second mark for ass-busting goodness.)



In Orlando, House will disappear (he shoots 48% from the floor at home, versus 40% on the road), but Pierce will give more, and unless the Magic get Courtney Lee back fast (which gets JJ Redick to the bench), the C's will steal a game and make it a best of three. You know, like what they do every series, really...

205 Drop: Top 10 ways the NBA will try to spice up the rest of the NBA playoffs

Just in time for the Blowout Round of the NBA playoffs (you'll forgive me, dear readers, for catching up on my sleep and day job, rather than watch the Cavs roll the Hawks or the Nuggets roll the Mavs last night, in all likelihood ending both of those series), it's a fresh list of snark for your perusing enjoyment. Sharp-eyed readers will note the 28th attempt to push the meme of Cheerleader Catfighting, which puts that meme somewhere in the realm of running site gag and uncomfortable personal admission.

And since the list was written before the Rockets upset the Lakers in Game One (I know, I know, it's shocking how these things are written in advance, isn't it?), there's always the chance of Rocket Fan getting all bent out of shape, which is always fun. Of course, this assumes the existence of Rocket Fan, or that he can pry himself away from the gun range and secessionist Web sites to put thumbs to keyboard. (Bonus round for people who enjoy reading angry comments: see how many of them assume that I'm a Laker Fan.)

I'm Shocked, Shocked, To Find...

Oh, just when it was safe to go back to Blogfrica... the prodigal interception machine is going to meet with the Vikings and Brad Childress about their quasi-vacancy at QB, given that Gus Frerotte and Tarvaris Jackson don't exactly inspire confidence.

Nor, for that matter, does Quitter Boy, who is free and clear of the Jets now that they've got Matt Sanchez and, well, didn't want his sorry ass around.

One wonders, really, when the national media will finally wake up and smell the coffee here. I don't particularly care what Favre does or doesn't do; hell, as a fantasy stat hound, I might even draft his ass in a dome with Adrian Peterson to hand the ball off to, though it's not as if he has a track record of success under glass.

I would also completely change my tune about him if, for the love of Vince Lombardi, he just came out and said something like this.

"Look, I might have talked about going back to the farm and being a family man and being old and tired before, but let's face facts. I'm going to make a boatload of money from playing, and I won't if I'm not. I'm also not so good that I want to be in a situation where a team has any other option but to put up with me and my 20+ picks a year. So New York made sense last year, and Minnesota makes sense this year, and so long as I can keep doing this without getting benched or wearing a Raiders jersey, I'm going to keep getting paid."

Honesty, Brett. It might not sell as many pairs of Wrangler jeans, but it will recover what's left of your soul.

Don't Hate The Pasta Dude

Dominos Pasta DUDE!


Thirty second of surreality from a bygone era. I especially like the whitest kid ever informing us that this is tight. (H/t, Deadspin/Leitch)

205 Drop:Top 10 effects of the swine flu pandemic on US sports

Today's link is ripped from last week's headlines and this week's lingering paranoia, especially from your less-savvy Internet-using relatives. It's the usual chucklefest, and will hopefully get those delightful commenters to tell me that (a) poker is not a sport, (b) soccer is popular so there, and (c) CC Sabathia doesn't consume so much pork in a week as to have his name and picture hung up somewhere in a porcine revenge cult's hall of murderers. In other words, the usual crowd of people making the tragic mistake of taking life too seriously.

As for the pandemic itself, as I turn off the Snark Light and punditize for a moment, I have to say that I was amazed at the Mexican authorities reaction to it. Imagine, if you would, baseball, football and basketball games that were played, but closed to the public. I think you'd have the lawyers involved, and heavily, on a million fronts: people suing for the right to go to the game (particularly if they had tickets already), others crying that their right of free (well, far from free, but you get the point) assembly had been violated, to the vending and parking and other temp jobs that would go bye-bye without a crowd to serve. Maybe those house seats from across the street at Wrigley go for five figures then. Etc.

I'm also certain that we'd have untold amounts of Lemur coverage as to how the home team was being made to lose an incredible advantage from the non-home game, and stat geeks and degenerate gamblers working every last kernel of information to see if there was an edge in the de facto change of venue. To wit: would a silent stadium aid or abet free throw shooting? Would the lack of tens of thousands of bodies (and their subsequent, albeit probably infinitesimal, effect on the wind, humidity and temperature) help the pitcher more, or the hitter? Would offensive teams go to a silent count for fear that the clearly held QB would tip off play calling? And so on, and so on, and so on.

Heck, at this point, I'm a little intrigued by the no-crowd game. Bring on the plague!

Oh, and the Mexicans? They just played soccer and moved on; I think they're going back to normal this week. Something to be said for that, of course, but dammit... I thought you people were supposed to be more fun than the gringos, no?

HowEVAH!

A small note to the Lemur's Jonathan Coachman, who the Internets tells me used to do the wrestling thing and now has the highlight job: you don't really need to punctuate every highlight with this word. Quite Frankly, it's a bad career path...

Yao Doesn't Need Paul Pierce's Magic Wheelchair

Tonight in Los Angeles, with his team leading in the fourth quarter in Game 1 of a series that no one really gave them much of a chance to win, Yao Ming banged knees with Kobe Bryant and went down in agony. Pau Gasol converted a slam dunk to make it a six point game with just under five minutes left, and Team Rocket's medics quickly hobbled the big man off to the locker room. The Lake Show looked like it would escape with a rusty win on a night where Kobe Bryant wasn't getting to the line or hitting enough shots, and was fighting off illness.

And then Ming, a guy who's career has been defined by injury, waved off the trainers and came back. He also did more than just return, scoring eight points in crunch time and ensuring the road team win the start of a suddenly interesting second round series. And it's not like the Lakers are going to be able to just work the refs for next game (they were just 12 of 19 from the line, compared to Houston's 25 of 29), since they were the ones causing a huge cut on Shane Battier's face on a Trevor Ariza no-call, and they also just didn't seem all that interested in going to the rack against people like Ming, Battier and Ron Artest.

To be sure, the Lakes played their worst game of the playoffs, but that's what happens when the Rockets win; they make you look terrible with Battier's brand of effective hoop on the small points. They also exploited the Lakers' Achilles heel at point guard, with Aaron Brooks and Kyle Lowry outscoring Derek Fisher and Jordan Farmar 25 to 11, and fought the bench to a draw (16 to 18), which basically means that Lamar Odom didn't do much. Andrew Bynum had some moments tonight, but he still seems like a fifth wheel to me, and more than a little lost on defense.

I still think the Lakers will win this series, but tonight's game was the perfect starter for the Rockets... in that they not only got the win, but they also had the Lakers standing around watching Bryant (31 shots for him, 57 for the rest of the team), which sows the seeds of distrust for later. The Lakers lose when the big men aren't involved as passers, and that can't happen when Kobe is doing his Atlas Shoots routine. The playoffs just got more interesting.

Celtics Fan Shows The Love and Loyalty

Tonight in Boston, as the home team staggered off after a leg-dead first half that created a deeper hole than even the drama boys could overcome, what did Celtics Fan do? Boo. My dears, don't you know that only Philly Fan could do such a thing? Shocking!

As for actual analysis here, the C's aren't going to win games, home or away, when Rajon Rondo and Ray Allen each shoot 2 for 12. I don't see that kind of thing continuing, but it is noteworthy that Kendrick Perkins gave the C's something (6 and 16, with 3 blocks, in 36 non-foul plagued minutes), which is a hell of a lot more than the Magic saw in the Round 1 series against the Sixers. The Magic are now 3-0 against the C's when Kevin Garnett is a spectator, which describes the rest of this series... but I still feel good about my C's in 7 pick.

But before I end on this... what the hell is wrong with the Magic's willingness to piss away huge second half leads? Tonight, they were 28 before crapping the bed with quick misses and turnovers, and needed late Rafer Alston heroics and some awful return turnovers from the C's to ice it. There wasn't even any rampant free throw bricking to explain this; it was just the Magic losing their minds and almost giving away another game. Let's just say the Cavs aren't going to get scared watching the tape on this one.

Blogrolling sets fires and creeps you out

Far be it for us to avoid the Stephen Strasburg hype. The College Baseball Blog does it better than most.

The Ghost of Wayns Fontes with the love for the Off Track Betting Parlor. Who doesn't love this place?

MLJ with the extremely depressing five-year recap of the MLB first round. What a waste. No wonder the good teams give up picks for free agents like water.

Minor league baseball -- it's fantastic! And by fantastic, I mean, really regrettable and kind of sad.

We're getting closer to legal online gambling, folks. You know, like grown up countries.

And you people wonder why I don't like hockey. It comes in black and white with creepy puppets! (But only if you are a Bernie Federko fan. Yes, I'm old.)

Come After Me

On the off chance that you read the blog, aren't on my e-mail list and want to come celebrate me finally becoming, after 40 years and 2 days, A Man... well, email me at dmt shooter at gmail dot com. (Aka, my 40th birthday.)

Inspiration, as always, comes from self-righteous college football coaches who are taking life far too seriously.



I especially like the fact that he got applause when he left. That's what you do when you are in the presence of a man -- you show some respect!

Anyway, your date is Friday, June 5, your place is an Atlantic City casino that has a poker room TBD later, and we will eat manly things, drink manly drinks, and make manly wagers. I'll hit you back late next week with the details.

(Oh, and the final word on this was given by the Shooter Wife, who told me not to spend too much on the hooker. When I shot down the idea of paying for it by asking her what I'd do after the first 14 minutes, her reply was "Tell her about your blog?" I married well.)

205 Drop: Top 10 signs the new Yankee Stadium is a bandbox

Some quick words about the usual list of snark this morning that aren't nearly as funny, at least not intentionally...

It's not exactly a done deal that the new yard is Coors East. But if it is, the home town team is in serious, serious trouble.

The Yankee philosophy of winning baseball, such as it is under the Fredo Steinbrenner / Brian Cash and More Cashman regime, is simply this: win with as little risk of not winning as possible. You do that by collecting the most predictable asset in MLB; dependable offensive power, preferably based around the merits of slugging and on-base percentage, on offense, and premium starting pitching on defense.

Year over year, this is the asset that is collected in the Bronx; it is also what they draft for, value in trade, and pay for to such an extent that little, if anything, is left over for injury back-ups (witness what they've trotted out there at catcher and third base during the recent A-Rod and Posada injuries). It's also the asset that is most destroyed by a bandbox yard.

Simply put, when your obscenely compensated power hitter hits a three-run bomb that goes 450 feet in the new place, it's a good thing; it keeps the stands filled, creates nice easy high-margin run wins that cover over your faltering bullpen, and stakes your power rotation arms to just rare back and get outs the old-fashioned way; by themselves. You win lots of 8-5 kind of games, you almost never have a long losing streak, and when a bad pitching team comes to town, or you play an MLB- squad after the All-Star Break, you roll them. It's not exactly a formula for playoff success, but you get there, and what the hey, if a few guys get hot in October, you win it all. It's a game that dozens of MLB franchises would like to play; it's roughly akin to being the big stack in poker, bullying the other players, and seeing every flop.

But if the new yard is a bandbox? Well then, your obscenely compensated home run hitter is matched by my MLB- Jason Kendall clone (that'd be the A's Kurt Suzuki, who is as good of a young catcher as you can have, provided you ignore his absolute lack of power) going opposite-field yard, as he did in a recent game at Yankee Stadium 2, Electric Offensive Boogaloo. Suddenly, what wins isn't the neutralized power hitters or the suddenly overtaxed starting pitching, but defense and pitching depth -- you know, like last year's Phillies team, or the '07 Rockies. Compare the defending World Series champions on defense against this Yankee team, especially at shortstop and the outfield (and yes, Yankee Fan, it helps a lot if the outfielder can throw, rather than just run). Compare the relative stats of the middle relievers, provided you can stand to look at WHIPs that look like ERAs, and ERAs that look like interest rates from a guy who breaks thumbs.

Even if the place is what it seems to be, I don't think that NYY falls off the face of the earth; there's too much talent here for the yard to completely overwhelm it, and they do play half of their games on the road, in front of mo